down in the dumps

I've had a really rough month & was not sure if I should talk about it. I'm going through a very messy divorce & I found out 11 days before my surgery that my ex had cancelled my insurance during open enrollment. So... I had to scramble to get new insurance at my work  & now have to go through the whole process again!!! My husband & the lovely girl he left me for have both had bypass surgery & I'm not sure if she is on here. At this point I don't care cause I'm so upset about being so close & having to start all over again. It has put my eating into a frenzy as well as my mind.

Hi,
First off a HUG.  I'm sorry about your marriage ending, and about the stress you are feeling right now.

Below your avatar, it says you had surgery July 8th, but in this post you said you were getting really close to having surgery but have to start the process over again, so I can't tell which surgery you mean. 
Your husband cannot cancel your insurance without his employer sending you a letter letting you choose COBRA.  This is your right.  Is the new insurance at your work a different company than the one you had through your husband?  If it's a different one, do they cover your surgery? 

Which part do you have to start over again?  I would think getting authorized and scheduled should be all, right? 
You can still use all the documentation from the pre-op weight program and all your preop tests and weight history for this other insurance and have your surgeon's office send in a request to them for surgery preauth.  Don't give up.  You can do this. 

Thanks So much for the hug, I need lots of them. I was scheduled for July 8th when I found out about the insurance being cancelled. During open enrollment a spouse can make any changes without being questioned. It may not seem right but that is what my lawyer & his benefits department have told me. Yes, it is a different insurance company & it just need to be approved. I had BCBS & was very spoiled with how quick they approved my surgery. I now have Cigna & they have had the paperwork for 4 weeks & still no answer. The mental part of being so close & ready & have it taken away is killing me.

I know what it feels like, because Aetna took 4 weeks before they acknowledged receiving my preauth request.  I had my surgeon's office send it to Aetna 3x and finally they acknowledged receiving the papers.  One week later, I got my approval, so hang in there!  Try to put your focus away from what was lost and toward what you will be getting now that Cigna is going to pay for your surgery.  It will happen. 

OH, I see what you mean about the open enrollment thing.  If your lawyer said so it must be true.  I hope Karma comes and bites your ex in the @$$. You have a right to be angry.

I am so sorry, that is not good. I would have already broken his knee caps at this point and that would just be for sport and then....................

I would talk to my lawyer, something does not sound right, I am not sure he can do that.  It depends on your agreement but I would check that out.  Stay positive, I know it is easier said than done.  This will all pass.  Just think in a year you will be divorce and moving on. You will have your WLS and be healthy for your two girls. STAY POSITIVE!  Time for one of these.
Hugs Kristen

(((HUGS)))

I am so sorry that you are going through all this. I know that no one want to hear that eventually it will get better, but it will. That which does not kill us makes us stronger. You will get through all this and come out a better person in the end. Take care of you and if you ever feel the need to vent you are more then welcome to PM me.

Thanks so much, I'm kinda new so that means a lot

i have a personal question for you.  do you have a separation agreement, legally known as a limited divorce?  i have also been through a divorce in maryland, which by the way ladies.. is different from most states... and the first thing my attorney told me was to not leave without a separation agreement.  our SA spelled out everything, including who would maintain all insurances (health, car, life, etc.) and who would pay for them.  therefore, because i held the health insurance, i was legally obligated to maintain a family policy that included until the day my divorce was final or he sought his own coverage, whichever came first.