One week to go--last minute freakouts!
So, my surgery is a week from today and I am going a high protein, low carb, low fat, lots of water, shrink your liver diet...and last night I freaked out. I forgot to pig out on pi**a for the last time! It reminded me of breaking up with someone and being sad that I didn't know that the last kiss was the last kiss...so I didn't enjoy it.
Of course, that lead to: can I really do this? Can I really spend the rest of my life unable to gorge on certain foods? I am hoping this is normal. I have been craving soup, but have been holding out since I will be able to enjoy chicken and beef broth pretty soon after surgery.
I have also convinced myself in the past 48 hours that: I have a pulmonary embolism, I am the only person in the world who will actually gain weight a a result of WLS, and my surgeon will decide on Tuesday that it would be fun to have a long island iced tea with breakfast.
I am trying to make sure and stay busy for the next week...but it is hard! My surgeon, and primary care doc, and partner, and dietician have suggested laying off of the "side effects" and "mortality associated with WLS" internet pages for the next week. I think they're right! :-)
Thanks for letting me babble...
OMG!! LOL!! Of course, I'm laughing with you, not AT you. I so understand everything you're saying. But please let me assure you that your life is not over, to the contrary, it's just begin.
You WILL eat pizza again, I promise. Will you gorge? Not unless you want to !! But you won't have the desire to gorge, and in fact, you may lose your taste for pizza. Yeah, right, I know. Lots of things change after wls, unfortunately, our minds aren't as quick to catch on as our bodies.
On Saturday night, I had a half a salad, and 1-1/2 pieces of pizza. And that was a lot!! A lot for a girl who used to be able to eat the salad (because that made the whole meal healthy), and 6-8 pieces of pizza!!!
Trust me, you're giving yourself the gift of life. We all go through these fears and emotions, and we've all been convinced that we will be the first for whom wls DOESN'T work. It does - you have to work it - but it's a wonderful tool you're being given.
Hang in there and feel free to PM me any time! And rather than dwelling on the negatives, read the daily Feed Bag, 3 Things and Affirmation posts and look how far we've come!!!
Hugs,
Tia
I remember before my surgery I had my "last supper" at Outback Steakhouse, thinking I'd never eat there again. Yeah, right. I've eaten there at least a half dozen times in the last 2 1/2 years since surgery. Now, granted, my last supper I had 16 wings, the 20 ounce porterhouse steak, huge baked potato and desert and now I usually have a small piece of steak, baked potato and salad with leftovers to bring home. But, the point is I didn't realize I'd be eating Outback after surgery. It wasn't right away, but it wasn't too long after I was back on regular foods. My pouch didn't allow me to get too carried away. What a great tool we were all given.
Anyway, congratulations on your upcoming big day and relax. You will eat "normal" again.
"No matter how hard life may get, no matter how many curveballs you are thrown, keep in mind, if you want to succeed - QUITTING IS NOT AN OPTION"!!!
Your feelings are completely normal and being anxious is to be expected. Try to think about all the reasons you are having the WLS and how your health will improve as well as your ability to enjoy life.
I totally agree with moving your focus away from the morbid websites and focusing on relaxing and preparing to join us on the losers bench! As Tia already said, you can eat pizza again, but you will just want a much smaller portion and won't have it daily, after you get closer to goal. I love soup too. I just enjoyed campbells cream of chicken soup with unjury chicken soup protein powder in it. Yum! I strained out the few chunks of chicken but it was very satisfying and healthy. Good luck next week and keep us posted! Those deep breaths you have to take to prepare your lungs for surgery do wonders to help you relax.