Why are we not good enough??

My boyfriend and I started dating 5 months after my surgery. I was nervous about telling him about my surgery, but then I thought "I am an awesome person regardless of what's on the outside". We sat and talked about it, I showed him pictures of me at my heaviest and he has seen the weight come off over the past 9 months that we've been together.

I asked him once what he would do/say if I gained the weight back and he said "You're beautiful no matter what you look like. You will still have the same big heart, fun personality and positive soul." I was positively floored! I was hoping he would love me regardless and he does!

Now, I think about your friend- she needs to find someone who love her for her AND except the fact that not everyone is going to think our decision to have surgery was a great one. She deserves the best and shouldn't beat herself up over something she can't control.

-Chanel

What a jerk! I had to respond because I understand your friends rejection... and I haven't even experienced. However I do hide my WLS... I don't tell anyone I had it except my family and close friends. I didn't even tell my husbands extended family and when they found out they were pissed I didn't say something. I honestly didn't want to hear their thoughts... and go through my life long struggle with weight. I take my surgery very personally.. I'm totally ashamed I had to have it... and more ashamed it hasn't worked fully for me. I refuse to hang up my wedding pictures in my own home.... I fear that company will come over and see them... My husband is so upset that I won't hang them... but I just can't.

I am planning a revision soon- I found out that I have no pouch and my first RNY was done incorrectly... I'm not looking forward to living through the secret again. But I don't know how else to do it.

People judge others... and it's wrong.... That dude was insecure and a ***** Super shallow. Your friend is better off... but I feel so bad for her... I know her heart must be so broken that after all her hard work she's still rejected for something she used to be. So sad!

Well, we all know how I feel about society..WaWa, my dad, etc....

Did this guy come right out and say this? or are are you two assuming this is the case?  ...just curious.

No that's the worst part he started acting weird as soon as he saw her fluffy pictures. My friend told me that is the worst part he took the coward's way out and instantly cut her off. I think what upsets my friend the most is that this guy was somebody she connected with online last year but she was in a relationship at that time and he is the one who persued her. Ugh he is just a BIG jerk!!

Shilpa,

Hi its Kate.  I haven't talk to you in such a long time.  How are you?  I am finally leaving OPHM.  I am moving to a new co with j.  Anyway just wanted to say hi and tell you that I was thinking of you

K