Do You Pull Over and Ask for Directions?
*********************************************************
Do You Pull Over and Ask for Directions?
by Katie Jay, MSW, Certified Wellness Coach
Director, National Association for Weight Loss Surgery
www.nawls.com We've all known men (and women) *****fuse
to stop for directions when they get lost on
a road trip. We might chuckle about the
absurdity of some stubborn soul driving
around for hours on end, lost and unwilling
to ask for help. But isn't that what we sometimes do after
weight loss surgery? Part of the problem is that we have all dieted
before. We've all lost weight before. We've
taken our share of extreme measures. We've also read all the diet books, enrolled
in all the national diet programs, counted
calories, counted carbs, lived on cabbage soup,
eaten only eggs ... okay maybe that was just
me :o). The point is, we're under the illusion that
we know enough not to get lost on our journeys. The reality is, sometimes we get lost. Or
sometimes we are lost and don't even realize
it! Being open to and seeking out help is one of
the most important things a person can do
following weight loss surgery. Sometimes we view needing help as a weakness,
or as a loss of control, but I would argue
the opposite. When we admit we need help, we show a deep
strength. When we are open to input from
others, we have access to the best possible
information available. This doesn't mean we blindly turn control of
our lives over to others. It means we stay
open to the possibility that more and better
information is available to us -- and that we
can choose to adopt an attitude of open-
mindedness and unlimited potential. What does this mean in practical terms? Here
are some examples from my coaching practice. These are real scenarios that demonstrate how
important it is to adopt the belief that
outside help can improve the quality of your
WLS life: 1. Christine, a gastric bypass patient, was
told by her dietitian to use Tums as her calcium
supplement. Because Christine was involved in a
NAWLS coaching group, she learned that her
supplement should be calcium citrate, not calcium
carbonate. (She didn't even know she was lost.) 2. Toni had developed a transfer addiction to
alcohol. Her marriage was at risk and her child
was acting out in extreme ways. Toni reached
out to me, asking for help to find treatment. Because she was open to suggestions, she sought
a counselor who specialized in addiction and
followed the therapist's advice. She saved her
marriage and was able to get help for her child,
too. 3. Susan was baffled when she stopped losing
weight. She truly believed she was, in her
words, "doing everything right." Instead of
giving up, thinking she had done all she could,
she asked someone in her support group to help
her figure out what the problem was. Together,
they did research and eventually solved the
problem. And when Susan decided to make some
changes in her lifestyle, her friend became
her accountability buddy. 4. Donna felt hopeless and unable to take care
of herself, but she didn't realize she was
clinically depressed. When she called for
coaching, I referred her to get evaluated for
depression -- and she began taking medication. Her gray world has become technicolor, and she
feels hopeful and motivated again. 5. Holly felt like a failure. She went from
380 pound to 190 pounds, but had not reached her
goal weight of 150. A few women in her surgeon's
support group had lost to goal and gotten plastic
surgery -- and Holly felt fat and shut out. Rather than retreating to her house and eating
herself into oblivion, which she was tempted to
do, Holly sought help. Over time, Holly was able
to shift from her belief that she was a failure
to seeing herself as a rare success story. She
stopped trying to diet and began to live. All of these women were open to the idea that
getting help is an important part of long-term
recovery after weight loss surgery. All of them
were able to defy the shame-filled voice in
their head that was telling them not to break
their silence, telling them they were a failure,
or that they would be judged because of their
problems. The WLS journey is life long. There is no need
to go it alone. In fact, by stopping and asking
for directions, your chances of getting where
you want to go (or realizing you've already
arrived) are much, much greater. Have a great WLS day!
*********************************************************
Want to Reprint this Newsletter?
If you'd like to reprint any part of this newsletter,
do so with the following credit, including the copyright
line:
From Small Bites, the email newsletter for the
National Association for Weight Loss Surgery.
Subscribe today and get your F'REE report,
How to Regain-proof Your Weight Loss
Surgery at www.NAWLS.com.
(c) 2010 National Association for Weight Loss Surgery,
Inc. All rights reserved.
National Association for Weight Loss Surgery, 609A Piner Road, #319, Wilmington, NC 28409
by Katie Jay, MSW, Certified Wellness Coach
Director, National Association for Weight Loss Surgery
www.nawls.com We've all known men (and women) *****fuse
to stop for directions when they get lost on
a road trip. We might chuckle about the
absurdity of some stubborn soul driving
around for hours on end, lost and unwilling
to ask for help. But isn't that what we sometimes do after
weight loss surgery? Part of the problem is that we have all dieted
before. We've all lost weight before. We've
taken our share of extreme measures. We've also read all the diet books, enrolled
in all the national diet programs, counted
calories, counted carbs, lived on cabbage soup,
eaten only eggs ... okay maybe that was just
me :o). The point is, we're under the illusion that
we know enough not to get lost on our journeys. The reality is, sometimes we get lost. Or
sometimes we are lost and don't even realize
it! Being open to and seeking out help is one of
the most important things a person can do
following weight loss surgery. Sometimes we view needing help as a weakness,
or as a loss of control, but I would argue
the opposite. When we admit we need help, we show a deep
strength. When we are open to input from
others, we have access to the best possible
information available. This doesn't mean we blindly turn control of
our lives over to others. It means we stay
open to the possibility that more and better
information is available to us -- and that we
can choose to adopt an attitude of open-
mindedness and unlimited potential. What does this mean in practical terms? Here
are some examples from my coaching practice. These are real scenarios that demonstrate how
important it is to adopt the belief that
outside help can improve the quality of your
WLS life: 1. Christine, a gastric bypass patient, was
told by her dietitian to use Tums as her calcium
supplement. Because Christine was involved in a
NAWLS coaching group, she learned that her
supplement should be calcium citrate, not calcium
carbonate. (She didn't even know she was lost.) 2. Toni had developed a transfer addiction to
alcohol. Her marriage was at risk and her child
was acting out in extreme ways. Toni reached
out to me, asking for help to find treatment. Because she was open to suggestions, she sought
a counselor who specialized in addiction and
followed the therapist's advice. She saved her
marriage and was able to get help for her child,
too. 3. Susan was baffled when she stopped losing
weight. She truly believed she was, in her
words, "doing everything right." Instead of
giving up, thinking she had done all she could,
she asked someone in her support group to help
her figure out what the problem was. Together,
they did research and eventually solved the
problem. And when Susan decided to make some
changes in her lifestyle, her friend became
her accountability buddy. 4. Donna felt hopeless and unable to take care
of herself, but she didn't realize she was
clinically depressed. When she called for
coaching, I referred her to get evaluated for
depression -- and she began taking medication. Her gray world has become technicolor, and she
feels hopeful and motivated again. 5. Holly felt like a failure. She went from
380 pound to 190 pounds, but had not reached her
goal weight of 150. A few women in her surgeon's
support group had lost to goal and gotten plastic
surgery -- and Holly felt fat and shut out. Rather than retreating to her house and eating
herself into oblivion, which she was tempted to
do, Holly sought help. Over time, Holly was able
to shift from her belief that she was a failure
to seeing herself as a rare success story. She
stopped trying to diet and began to live. All of these women were open to the idea that
getting help is an important part of long-term
recovery after weight loss surgery. All of them
were able to defy the shame-filled voice in
their head that was telling them not to break
their silence, telling them they were a failure,
or that they would be judged because of their
problems. The WLS journey is life long. There is no need
to go it alone. In fact, by stopping and asking
for directions, your chances of getting where
you want to go (or realizing you've already
arrived) are much, much greater. Have a great WLS day!
*********************************************************
Want to Reprint this Newsletter?
If you'd like to reprint any part of this newsletter,
do so with the following credit, including the copyright
line:
From Small Bites, the email newsletter for the
National Association for Weight Loss Surgery.
Subscribe today and get your F'REE report,
How to Regain-proof Your Weight Loss
Surgery at www.NAWLS.com.
(c) 2010 National Association for Weight Loss Surgery,
Inc. All rights reserved.
National Association for Weight Loss Surgery, 609A Piner Road, #319, Wilmington, NC 28409
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Seek always to do some good, somewhere. Every man has to seek in his own way to realize his true worth. You must give some time to your fellow man. For remember, you don't live in a world all your own. Your brothers are here too.
Albert Schweitzer
Albert Schweitzer
Tri****hink this is the best one yet. Thank you so much for taking the time and effort to find things like this. When I was a newbie I also thought the honeymoon phase would last forever or at least the feeling that I finally had control but just like driving a car it needs constant steering in the right direction or you'll crash - guess same can be said for us - if we don't have directions and tune-ups (aka support) we will never continue in this wonderful journey.
'One shoe can change your life'...Cinderella
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