My Husband has a question????

This may seem strange but my husband was wondering - how the spouse handles eating with the partner eating the tiny amount. He said he is going to feel strange eating a regular amount of food while I have my mini meal. He is concerned about other things like if we go out to eat - how strange has that been for other spouses. Any insight would be helpful to him.( He is very supportive, just concerned.)

it was weird at first.. but now my husband declines the bread before the meal at restaurants.. and asks for crackers for our kids instead.. where as before we would eat 2 baskets of bread with butter.. so its making him healthier too. ive noticed his portion sizes cut down since im not eating as much. it makes it easy if your husband likes things you can have like grilled chicken and steamed veggies.. because then you could share a plate.. of course you would only eat 1/5 of the food.. but he would still have a healthy portion then, instead of the reason americans get so obese , our portions are way to much food at restaurants. it becomes a lifestyle of overeating and thats what we are used to, when in reality our bodies do not need that much food to operate .. it is difficult for me sometimes when i see my husband being able to indulge himself like i used to. because now i realize i had a eating disorder, and loved to binge. i got pleasure out of starving, then stuffing down a huge plate of food. So the first few weeks after surgery i was jealous because i couldnt do that still. and now, it turns me off mostly. for instance i LOVED pizza before.. i mean it was my meal of choice lol.. now it makes me wanna :puke: thinking about eating pizza. which is beyond me! lol. but its like you WANT to be healthy now, and you enjoy seeing that scale move down so much and your body transform that the food is not the obsession anymore, your health and weight loss, and feeling better about yourself becomes your new "obsession" i guess. We eat to live now instead of live to eat. I still treat myself to foods that arent "GREAT" .. but its only a few bites and thats all. and its not often. and when i say foods that arent good i mean like ill take a couple of bites of my kids cheesesburger, and not eat the thicker piece of bread when i bite.. so its more meat, which is high in fat so i only take a couple bites. and maybe 2 fries. just enough to have the "Taste" is satisfying to me. a good place to go out to eat is red lobster, they offer kid crab legs with steamed veggies.. and you feel like youre eating "normal" with everyone else.. just ALOT smaller portion.. and thats that. good luck with everything. Everyone's experience is different. its all about how important food really is in your life, and i didnt realize just how big a role it was until after surgery. and now im learning to deal with the emotions without the food. Hope this LONG book make sense hahah.. Jen

MY HUBBY HE EATS WHAT EVER HE WANTS DNT BOTHER ME I KNOW I CAN NOT HAVE IT.Sometimes well alot now I just dnt cook now like I did he does alot of cooking lol.but we go out & eat just get smaller sizes or take left over home but he helps me eat what I dnt & now he is gainning weight so he has started going to gym lol. when I first had the surgery I could not eat at the table because I was eating to fast I guess trying to keep up with everybody else eating so fast but now I can slow down & eat .you also can eat off a smaller plate that is what I do & it feels like you have a full plate .. good luck with surgery It is comming up right you will have to come to a meeting we would love to have you alot of great ppl come & will answer alot for you. my phone # is 843-760-6046 call any time ok if you need anything

ACTUALLY MS DEBBIE, WE HAVE JUST GONE THROUGH SOMETHING KINDA FUNNY ABOUT THAT ... WE LOVE TO EAT OUT - 4-5 TIMES A WEEK, BUT WE DECIDED TO START COOKING AT HOME TO SAVE SOME MONEY. WELL, WHA-LAH, NICK HAS NOW GAINED ABOUT 8 #s ON MY COOKING ... SO, EATING OUT ISN'T SUCH A BAD THING AFTERALL!! AS FOR EATING OUT ... WE FINALLY GOT TO THE POINT WHERE WE JUST ORDER 1 MEAL & I TAKE A FEW BITES FROM HIS MEAL, OTHERWISE I HAVE LEFTOVERS FOR WEEKS THAT I JUST END UP THROWING OUT. SINCE I'M EATING RIGHT ALONG WITH HIM, & WE'RE "SHARING", IT IS ACTUALLY MORE ENJOYABLE. IF HE ORDERS SOMETHING I DON'T WANT OR HAVE A HARD TIME EATING, THEN I ORDER AN APPETIZER OR AN ALA CARTE ITEM, & HAVE IT SERVED AT THE SAME TIME AS HIS MEAL. I'VE ALWAYS HAD FLUIDS WITH MY MEALS (JUST COULDN'T GET USED TO NOT HAVING A DRINK) SO WHEN I FINISH EATING SOONER THAN NICK, I SIP ON MY DRINK ... WE DON'T ORDER DESSERT SO THAT ISN'T A PROBLEM. INSTEAD, WE HAVE SF POPCICLES, NSA FUDGE, FRUIT & ICE CREAM BARS & NSA ICE CREAM AT HOME. OUR EATING OUT SEEMS MORE FUN NOW AS WE TALK MORE INSTEAD OF BEING FOCUSED ON SHOVELING IN AS MUCH FOOD AS WE CAN. SHARING FOOD IS WONDERFUL ... KIND OF OUR OWN SWEETNESS BETWEEN JUST US. IT'S ALSO A GOOD REMINDER TO NICK TO ORDER HEALTHIER SINCE WHAT I CAN EAT IS MOSTLY SEAFOOD, VEGES & FRUIT. YOU & HUBBY WILL GET YOUR OWN SPECIAL PATTERN ABOUT MEALS IN RESTUARANTS ... IT'S JUST A CHANGE, NOT A PROBLEM!!!! SOUNDS LIKE YOU HAVE A WONDERFUL HUSBAND! CHERISH HIM! GOD BLESS YOU ... DAWN & NICK

Thank you for the reply-I have given my husband the replies and I think it has easied him a little....That is one of the wonderful things about this site-others input on things...Thanks again...Debbie & Bud

Our pleasure, Ms Debbie ... Yes ma'am, this is a wonderful site. The people here are so giving & supportive. God bless ... Dawn & Nick