Bad mood!!

Someone cheer me up.  Its gonna be one of those days...and theres no one to blame!!!

Grrrrrr....

A couple were married and, following the wedding, the husband laid down some rules. "I'll be home when I want, if I want, and at what time I want," he insisted. "And, I don't expect any hassle from you. Also, I expect a decent meal to be on the table every evening, unless I tell you otherwise. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing, and card-playing with my buddies whenever I want. Those are my rules," he said. "Any comments?" His new bride replied, "No, that's fine with me. But, just understand that there'll be sex here at seven o'clock every night... whether you're here or not."

LOL!! I better watch out befor emy hubby starts using those same words on me.  I've been away from home inthe evenings for one reason or another way too much the past couple of weeks!!

Hey....take a look at your quote!!!!!  I am having new furniture delivered today......you can be happy for me.  If that doesn't work... then you can always call someone over to you and as they get to you...stick you foot out and trip them.   Joe did it to Samantha the other day and the smile on his face was priceless.  I did get mad at him, but only after I laughed under my breath.  She had kicked him in the shin earlier.....he did nothing at that time......just waited......and waited.  As my baby was picking herself up off the ground he told her..."that's what you get for kicking me".   She knew she had it coming to her....instead of yelling or blaming him, she just crawled up in my lap with this pitiful look on her face.   You could try that.  Joseph said it was worth every bit of the pain when I pinched her ear!!! Gotta run my furniture is here!!!!! :kiss:

I know thisis mean and hateful, but you getting new furniture made me jealous and grumpy. BUT THEN, your story about Josephs revenge made me smile. I'm EVIL!! Good thing I see my therapist tomorrow!!  Hehe...

Maybe she can see you today at lunch!!!!   Just kidding

It got crowded in heaven, so, for one day it was decided only to accept people who had really had a bad day on the day they died. St. Peter was standing at the pearly gates and said to the first man, "Tell me about the day you died." The man said, "Oh, it was awful. I was sure my wife was having an affair, so I came home early to catch her with him. I searched all over the apartment but couldn't find him anywhere. So I went out onto the balcony, we live on the 25th floor, and found this man hanging over the edge by his fingertips. I went inside, got a hammer, and started hitting his hands. He fell, but landed in some bushes. So, I got the refrigerator and pushed it over the balcony and it crushed him. The strain of the act gave me a heart attack, and I died." St. Peter couldn't deny that this was a pretty bad day, and since it was a crime of passion, he let the man in. He then asked the next man in line about the day he died. "Well, sir, it was awful," said the second man. "I was doing aerobics on the balcony of my 26th floor apartment when I twisted my ankle and slipped over the edge. I managed to grab the balcony of the apartment below, but some maniac came out and started pounding on my fingers with a hammer. Luckily I landed in some bushes. But, then the guy dropped a refrigerator on me!" St. Peter chuckled, let him into heaven and decided he could really start to enjoy this job. "Tell me about the day you died?", he said to the third man in line. "OK, picture this, I'm naked, hiding inside a refrigerator...."

omg! thats hilarious!

mines not NEAR as good as the st. peters one.. but i thought of Stephanie when writing this one.. Blonde pregnant with twins... A blonde was running down her street screaming and shouting in celebration when her neighbor came outside to see what the commotion was all about.. The neighbor said "Whats going on!" She said "IM PREGNANT!!!" the neighbor knew she had been trying to concieve so she was excited for her.. then the blonde said "WITH TWINS!!!" the neighbor confused asked, "How would you know so soon?!?!" The blonde said, "Walmart makes these AWESOME Test!!! Theyre at home pregnancy test, and they sell Twin-packs!!! I took them and BOTH were positive!!!!"

now that I have found the Edit button thanks to kathy and her mistakes.. i wont let you all see how stupid i am so im editing out my errors.. hahahah  im so smart!!! AHAHAHAHAHH