hello my name is jen..

and im a shopaholic..  so we've "joked" about this before. but its getting serious! i just found myself daydreaming of going to american eagle to check out their new fall jeans!! and was getting a RUSH thinking about it! i have blown SOOOOOO Much money this year its rediculous. like im ashamed of how much it is that i wont even say.   im out of control!!! if im depressed,, i shop! if im anxious.. i shop! its like my CURE ALL from all feelings.. i shop and im happy! at least for a brief moment until i get back to reality and realize how much money i just spent.. on stuff i didnt need! then im depressed twice as much. i need a therapist. i hate therapist though! i need a budget.. and i hate budgets!!!  ive NEVER used a budget. how ive managed thus far without one i dont know! but its kicking my azz now that im spending and spending and spending.. i dont even balance my checkbook i just know "about how much is in there".. BAD i know. i wish i could take my own debit card away for a month and see how much money i save! i would be shocked im sure.. but seriously if i go a couple of days without shopping for SOMETHING .. i get anxious and fidgety like an alcoholic does with withdrawals! i need help.. crazy in spartanburg- jen

*lol* wished I could shop... my 10's are getting baggy, looks like I've lost a whole family from the butt area...  and some 8's I can't keep up... what's up with the size difference? I hope ya get control for your shopping... Stephie

i wish i could too! haha.. lol thanks stephanie :)

Hi Stephie,   I'm with you on the being cheap end of things, I LOVVVVE to shop the second hand shops!  There's a LOT of very nice clothes there (Rich people, take there stuff there) Example: Best deal we found, 3 years ago my daughter was in need of a ball gown for the ROTC Christmas Military Ball, We found an absolutely gorgeous gown at BELKS for $350!!  There was just no way I could put that kind of money in a dress to wear for one night,  We decided to wait a few days and shop again then, in the mean time,  I told her lets stop by the second hand shop to see if they have any jeans in my size,  We walk in the door and there on the front rack is THE EXACT SAME DRESS FROM BELKS, Same color and miracles of all miracles it was just Jessica's size! And get this .... $350 at BELKS right? Can we say $12.00 yes I said $12.00!! I LOVE THIS STORE!!!! The most I have ever paid for something for myself is $6.00 the price for all their jeans, NAME BRAND JEANS!   But my most favorite place to shop is my best friend closet! ALLL the things she gives me are FREE!!!!  Talk about a shopalholic! She is THE BIGGEST SHOPPER IN THE USA,  I swear!! And she buys the really, really nice stuff. I have a closet FULL of clothes right now, my dresser drawers are so packed I can hardly close the drawers, She has given me many pretty Victoria's Secret bra's and shirts, (I hope to have something to make those bra's look good someday! LOL!) We also wear the same size shoes and she has given me a lot of pretty shoes by Seventh Avenue and even Harley-Davidson shoes! LOL!   The most clothes I have ever had in my life were about 10 outfits at most! 2 pairs of dress shoes and a pair of tennis shoes. So AM I LOVING THIS OR WHAT???!!!   If it were not for secondhand shops and my friend ..... I may be headed to DIVORCE COURT, because I know I would be worse than Jen ever had time to be.   Sorry to rattle on tonight, It must be the pain pill I took for my back.   Love ya!   Debra

Hello Jen I am Melissa..... Do you know anything about addiction transfer????? I think that is a huge problem for so many of us.  We can't get the"high " from eating anymore and we substitute something else.  It would be ok if we substituted it with something like going to the gym.....or something else positive but we usually don't.  You need to PUT AWAY THE DEBIT CARD!!!!!!   Did you hear what I said????  PUT IT AWAY!!!!!

i wish i could!!! and yea i know about addiction transfer.. i can tell it too bc when im shopping i dont care about food! but if im anxious from NOT shopping i wanna eat eat eat.. arghhh

I love you Jen!!!  I think we all have addictions.  I know that I am still addicted to food, well...and now ATIVAN!!  You know I'm not addicted to shopping.  You heard me complain about money I know 1,000 times during our recent endeavor.  I'm so cheap.  But, I understand addiction.  It is real.  I feel your pain. Rachel

rachel i envy your cheapness!!! LOL i really do!!! i have shopped away my new boobies that i had saved up for! think about it.. I bought clothes and other stuff in lieu of getting new boobies!! WTF is wrong with that!!! LOL  i laugh, but im depressed from it.. i laugh when im upset for some strange reason .. (i about put lol there heh) only thing that keeps me from feeling horrible is that alot of it (majority) was stuff for the kids..  hope to see u this week for lunch!

ugh...I hear ya!  Thankfully my hubby gives me a budgeted amount in cash to spend...then when it's gone, it's gone.  But man, as soon as I get it, I'm out the door shopping!!  lol   Shopping always makes me feel better.  :)   Maybe you could budget an amount, then only carry that with you when you go to the store??   It helps me.

Good Morning Jen.... When I first met John... he was bouncing checks all over Atlanta.. He had no clue how to save or budget... When he got a notice stating he'd bounced another check.. he would be shocked.. when I asked him when the last time he balanced his checkbook.. his response was.. I keep it all UP HERE.. (( and pointed to his head )) .. he would also go by the balance on the ATM receipt.  Needless to say.. after we got married.. I put a stop to that crap REALLY QUICK! If he uses the debit card.. he has to account for the transaction... and has to give me the receipt. The quickest way I stopped him from the spending spree's he use to go on.. is give him a set amount of cash. That's all he gets to spend.. with him.. I guess because he wasn't handing over cold hard cash when he would buy something.. it didn't add up to him. Now that he has to hand over cash for everything.. he thinks twice before he spends it.  I know some people think this is a control thing on my part.. but you know what.. our bills are paid.. we have a nice house ... all our cars are paid for... and if we want to buy something.. the cash is there....  Try just using cash for a month... leave your debit card at home... give yourself enough cash to get through the month.. and be firm with yourself... NO DEBIT CARDS.. NO CREDIT CARDS!