Caregiving and RNY

I am a47 year old grandmother who takes full time care of my 2 year old grandson, and my question is will I be able to care for him when I get out of surgery, or will I need to get help for a few days? He weighs 27lbs. and I know I can't lift him for a while, but what do you other mothers do after surgery with your little ones?I'm really starting to worry about the technical stuff before hand and need to make some plans. So I would appreciate any incite. Thanks, Pam

Hey Pam ... !!  It is going to depend on your surgery type . If you have open , you may be out of commision for about 4 weeks . No lifting for sure . If you have lap .. it could be 2 weeks . And as always , you want to consult your surgeon .  I know plenty of Mom's that have WLS .. and they have help a few days out .. but everything work out .  Best to you .  Natalie

Good am Pam, Great question! Kayla our oldest was 2 1/2 when I had WLS and honestly things will come to you like 2nd nature. Meaning that you learn to improvise & do things in a manor in which it doesn't put a strain on you. Things I remember are getting her to climb up on the bed or couch to be changed clothes & diaper wise. They feel like big kids when you get them to do things like asking them to bring you the wipes & diaper and grabbing a shirt & pants if they are in a drawer. Kayla might not have matched but she was dressed lol!  Other things to consider is they are very "knowing" and curious & at times when she wanted to play A LOT I would talk to her about my surgery in kidspeak is what I call it (Nora is 2 1/2 almost 3 now) and I'd tell her Mommy has boo boo's on her tummy so we have to be careful not to jump or hit or run into mommy's belly.  I also suggest that you ask for someone to help you a few times during the day by checking in on you. One thing for me was how often initially I was sleepy & needed to sit & rest for a bit. Something I really became thankful for was being in the living room with a gate blocking access to the rest of the house so that it was a "safe" room with movies, toys, juice cup, snacks, pillow, blanket etc so that she had what she needed as did I so if I did fall asleep she was "safe."  In addition, depending on your type of surgery I would suggest you really have someone help you the first couple of weeks. After that you should be fine just needing to be careful! Let me know if you have any other questions. I hope this helps. All best......

Pam, I was a 48 year  old mother of a 2 year old son  when I had open RNY. I had help to care for him and was glad of that.  How much help you need depends on the surgery you are having  - so I can only speak for open RNY - but the the first few days you really do need to rest and recover from surgery before you do too much.  At least for the first week, learn to walk a lot and sip sip sip before you go caring for someone else.  I did not carry him for weeks after surgery in case I got a hernia. He learned to "help Mommy" by getting clothes and bringing me his night time diaper and climbing up on things for me - and he loved it. He had to learn not to run or jump at me and to be very gentle.... It was a little bit of a challenge but not too hard.  I think it was harder for me than it was for him lol!! Once a few weeks are over you get back to normal and it didn't seem to have made too much difference in the long run.... Hope this helps Jackie

I hope to have lap rny but it sounds like I might need just a little a help the first few days. Thanks for all the good tips, I'll be sure to use them, espesially the climbing up to get to me, Jackie, he'll like that part. I'm sure these good common sense methods will get me through and I shouldn't worry so much. Pam

Pam I sweated it but it really was not too hard on him - I used to worry about how to get him in the car etc but I just helped him climb in and he climbed onto his seat with me just gently guiding him and not lifting him ... he loved being a big boy and me thanking him for helping me....... You get into a routine and they just follow it... Good luck and let us know how you are doing.... Jackie