What do I tell others if I don't want to tell them I am having VSG?

You don't need to tell anyone anything. I said I was going on medical leave, that's it. As for all the reasons and needing to look in to yourself... some people just don't need to know your business! In my personal life, I told a lot of people of my choosing. I'm pretty open about it. I even tell strangers if the subject comes up but I do pick and choose. All that open book **** uhm no. I'd like to see other people wearing a sign that says "I have herpes" "My wife is cheating on me and I'm dumb enough to stay" "I have 6 toes" "I'm gay" "I have a small penis" or whatever else on their forehead. We just DON'T have to share every ******g detail of our life with everyone in the world and there's no shame in that. If you feel it's personal, then it's personal.

BTW, I do have a shirt that says "I'm gay".

Just saying.

Also, think it's a bit unfair to link having WLS to having your partner cheat on you or having herpes.  I think people should be proud to have the couarage to have WLS.

Why is it unfair? There are some things in life that I choose not to share. If someone has the "courage" to go around sharing that they have herpes then they can possibly save others from the same situation. Same with the cheating. My point is that what one person considers personal, another may think it's ok to share. I've read a lot of threads here where people make people feel ashamed for not wanting to be a billboard for WLS and I just think that's crazy. I don't want to be a billboard for WLS, being gay, herpes, cheating, any of that. I just want to be "normal." I think a lot of people feel that way and want to keep some (or a lot of) things private.

Oh dear, I don't know how to tell you this.... but... you're not normal.  You're sassy as hell.  I'm sorry to had to learn about it this way.

Sassy is the nice word for what I am!

And for the record... I don't have herpes! LOL!

This may not sound believable, but I don't really care if people say anything about my weight loss. I am doing this for myself, for my health, not for anyone else. I have no interest in standing out in a crowd...as an obese person or a normal-sized person.  I don't want the main focus of everyone else to be on me. I don't believe my worth has anything to do with how much I weigh. Maybe it's my stage of life, I am almost 60, married, my kids are married, I have a grandchild. I am not doing this for vanity or to be glamorous. ...I just want to be able to lead a more active life and enjoy being active with my granddaughter. :-)

Well, I think everyone has made some good points and it is certainly true that it is your right to choose not to disclose medical conditions/treatment.

However, if these people ever see you near food (meetings? group lunches? a shared refrigerator? someone walking by your office during lunch? celebrations?), they will know. I am sorry to be the one to break it to you, but no matter what you may say, it is likely they will know. 
 
When you go to restaurants, the servers will think you are not eating because there is something wrong with your meal. They will ask if everything is okay. In front of everyone.

Just food for thought while you make your decision.

And while you don't need to be a billboard or be responsible for saving everyone else, if you have any obese friends, they will want to know what you are doing that is working so well. To each their own, but I personally would feel dishonest by saying, "I'm following a low carb diet." While it may be partially true, an important component is missing.

Again, it is your choice and you should do whatever you think is best because only you know you and the work environment you are in, but I just wanted to point these things out while you are mulling it over.

Best,
Lindsey

I too am really struggling with this decision of when and how to tell my coworkers. We are a relatively small department and we all happen to be mostly open about things that are going on with us medically (as I work in a hospital). I am not ashamed of having WLS, but I do not want the opinions of others to deter my decision. I think that many people would be supportive, but there are some people who I do not think would agree with my decision. I will probably be up front with my boss, but maybe wait to tell the others until after the surgery. when I am back at wor****ep going back and forth about the best way to handle it. To complicate matters, I work at the hospital that my surgeon is at. Thankfully, I can have the surgery at our "sister" site. While I still know people there (and am planning on being up front with them beforehand) I think that my privacy will be better handled there. It is a very personal decision to make about when / how much information to share, and just because someone has a different opinion about the best way to handle it, it does not mean that their way is "better." We all have to do what is best for us, given our own personal situation.

Can't you say you are on vacation and then that you are on a strict diet and exercise program.  

I learned the hard way and told my two sisters expressly saying don't tell anyone.  Well one of sisters outed me at a family funeral.  I was furious. Don't tell unless you feel comfortable everyone knowing.  I still don't admit to surgery.  That is my wish. Maybe at some point I will change my mind but not now.

The problem with that is that my coworkers know that if I go on vacation, I am usually leaving the country and have lots of pictures posted on FB while I am away! To have a "quiet" vacation would be totally out of character for me and they would know something is up, lol.