HAVE I FAILED THE TEST?????

I have an 11 y/o aspie daughter. She cannot bathe, dress herself correctly, brush her teeth, etc... Is it because she can't or shr doesn't do it to my satisfaction? How did you handle these things?

I'd suspect it's all sensory. ~KD in WA

Pam, I don't think you can say you failed if you are doing everything to get your daughter the services she needs. I have an 11 y/o aspie son who is high functioning. He is in regular classes with pullouts for services like Gifted/Talented, PE with an OT, etc. He is on Lexapro and we use Panacea Creams transdermal vitamins, plus he sees a child psychologist at least once a month. We have seen tremendous improvements in him. As for as the bathing, brushing teeth...he does it but I would prefer him to spend more time at the tasks. Of course, most of the "normal" boys are pretty much the same way, being forced to bathe and then rebathe, so unsure about that part. Are you involved with the Autism Society? We have a great Families Helping Families Chapter here and most of them are also in the Autism Society. Those Support Groups have been a lifesaver and a gold mine of information. Sometimes just knowing you aren't alone helps. If you aren't involved in a Support Group then I would highly recommend it. Feel free to email me anytime. Anne 254/175/1??

I think we all struggle with whether we do too much for our kids when they can't do things for themselves. My son also had seizures until the last year, so we never, EVER left him alone. Now we're struggling with what things he can do for himself now that we take the seizures out of the equation. At this point, all we've worked up to is letting him take the garbage out to the dumpster in the parking lot. And goodness knows, even at 19, we haven't been letting the boy pour his own cereal because we don't want a mess to clean up! We were just talking today about how WE are the ones who need to work on that more than he does. You are definitely not alone with these questions.