I'll Always Be The Fat Girl

HELLO SMORES!!!!!! I've missed you all a lot!! Thanks to those of you who wrote me and those of you who answered my last post. it felt just like a big warm fuzzy hug!! I now weigh 244. Starting weight was 327. I'm in a size 22 pants and 18 top. before I wore size 30 pants (and that was a squeeze) and size XXXJumbo tops. I havent lost as much as I feel like I should have lost. But I feel about 10,0000 times better than I did this time last year. I dont feel like such a freak show now. Unless, of course you count the 5 tatoos and the red hair with 1/2 grey roots. I have come to the decision that some people werent meant to be thin. I will ALWAYS be the fat girl. In my heart and in my soul. Dont they say that we are shaped by our experiences in life? If thats true, then I have a very pretty, happy, thin girl in me being protected by mounds of fatty fat fatso fat. But I dont mind. I really dont. (gee! either I really have come to accept this or I'm the best BS'er here. I have thought many times about all of you. Wondering how youre doing on your own journey. But sometimes life swallows us whole........I know you all know what I mean. Anyways.........thanks for listening! Thanks for sharing! Thanks for being you....and you..........and you..........and ESPECIALLY YOU!!! willby and

Wilby, You have lost 83 pds in about 7 months. That is good. No one every promised it would just fall off. I am sure it didnt just jump on. I know mine didnt. You are doing a great job. As for the grey roots, I have them too. Yes I think us smo's will always be the fat girl inside our hearts and mind. We learned it well over the years. Anyway I love you and I have missed you. love marie

Marie((((((((((((((((((((HUG))))))))))))))))))))) I didnt even recognize you girlfriend.............where did your blonde hair go??? you look great!!!!!! I've surely missed you! willby

Willby, It is so good to see you posting! I think we all have times we feel like we will never escape our fat, like you said life exxperiences do shape who we are. I say you are doing fine.I have just broke the -101 lbs.I feel like I am losing so slowly and I just keep on trying and if it is slow then it is going in the right direction. I really miss your posts. Hugs, Lori

Lori(((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))) So nice to see youre smiling face! Thank you for thinking about me. You have done a wonderful job on your journey!!! willby

hi girl: i think you're doing really well. you may be stuck, or on a plateau, or done. the point is, you're feeling better and that's what counts. please try to understand, though, that you're loved for who you are, not your size. i guess i feel like you do from time to time. i remember posting here once, not too long ago, and SOMEONE telling me i wasn't allowed to give up and feel sorry for me. i'm not saying you're not allowed. i'm saying i wish you'd think of it as part of your journey. mine has not been without it's struggles, either. but like you, i'm a sight better off now than i was last year. PTL. and guess what else. i'm probably never gonna be rail thin. i'd be happy to get down under 200 lbs and into a size 14 or 16 or so. i think us smoers are just that way. i look at my journey as a lifetime. without the wls, the journey would have been shorter, by a lot. gotta step down off my soapbox now. i'm looking to do some chores around the house today and if there's no rain, we'll have a bonfire tonight. just want to say, again, you're loved for who you are - not your size. and i hope you keep coming back here. cause we all love you - alot. many hugs dorthe

Dorthe((((((((BIG BIGGER BIGGEST HUG)))))))))))) Thank you,Thank you, Thank you for always being here for me. It helps to know we are all in this boat together. willby

Willby, I hope those who are still pre-op read posts like yours and mine and see that this is not as easy as it might look. I've recently adjusted my ultimate goal weight from 168 (which would be the top weight for my height) to 199...I hope I get to 199...I started at 384 and now weigh 241.5 (just a couple of lbs less than you.) But, I haven't really been losing for awhile now and am feeling like I won't make it. I'm going to hang in there and keep working on it. I, too, feel so much better than I did a year ago. My one year surgiversary is in 2 days. There really is no comparison. But, my food addiction is still a struggle every single day. Big Hugs Willby! Lori

Lori, Happy Surgiversary!!! I think youve done a great job! if we could only love ourselves as much as we smores love each other!! Thank you for letting me know I am not alone in this struggle. GOOD LUCK!! willby

Hey there Willby!!!!!!! Good to "see" you posting! You poured out your heart and soul and I admire that! It's true, this weight loss is not as easy as most people think it is! I'm glad to see that overall you are feeling better - I think that's the main goal here, to FEEL better! I know I do. And as far as your progress so far - you really are doing well! I hope you feel good about that, because you are a success! Just hang tough - it'll be ok. Also remember we are always here! Lots of hugs from Miami, Carol