Should i feel this way?

Today i went with my husband and 2 sons to get mobilazation ids at the military base.. and i felt embarrased for my family i weigh 448 and my stomach hangs between my legs making it hard to walk..they didnt seem to mind.. Then we drive 2 hours home and i find out my aunt has passed away she was told about 6 months ago to have the surgery and couldnt... I come from a large family my grandmal weighed 500 pounds when she died.. IM scared and embarrsed but with my husband leaving for IRAQ i wonna do all ican with him and the boys. Ihave an appt on july 11th with dr.sonnastine in ky hope they take tricare...thanks for listening

Hey- I think its great that you aren't letting your weight hold you back. I doubt they were embarrassed...but I'm sure they were appreciative of the support you offer as a wife and mother I hope everything goes great at your appointment! ~Katrina

Hi! I think your hott! We should chat sometime! Look at that your in Prestonsburg too!

Hi and welcome to the forum. We are military and if you call tricare they might be able to help you find a provider in their network. With them you Never know what kind of service you'll get. I had to go through three docs before I was finally scheduled with one in their network. If the surgeon you choose is not in the tricare network you will have to pay out of pocke and then fight with them to try and get the money back. I'm very sorry to hear your husband is getting deployed. We've been lucky and my husband hasn't had to go back but I'm sure his time will come when we move back to the Mainland. Is your husband Guard or active duty? You should be able to go on base and see a surgeon there. Hang in there we are all here for you and if you ever need to vent or just want to chat I'm always around. My email is [email protected] HUGS, Jamie

hi rebel i see you are in indiana, as am i! welcome to the board. i'm sorry to hear your husband is being sent to iraq...that must be very difficult for you and your family. how old are your sons? i can tell you that having this surgery has totally changed my life. it's amazing how i can easily do things now that were impossible (or at least were a major effort) before. i started with a bmi very close to yours -- 66.4. that was 17 months ago. it's down to 29.7 currently. if you want to talk, or have questions about the surgery, please feel free to email me anytime. best to you! deb -256

I think I was always more embarrassed than my husband or kids were when we were in public. I felt like everyone was staring and whispering, "Ohmygaawd! Look at that fat woman!" When I voiced this to my husband, he was comforting and supportive and told me that even if they were talking he didn't care. My kids make it clear that they love me, fat and all. I think sometimes we are harder on ourselves than others are. Keep your head up!! Good luck at your appointment! L

Hi all, I dont respond much but felt strongly to reply to this one. My children and hub always told me at 400 pounds that i looked pretty yada yada and that my weight dint matter. Im down t0 256 now and I see signs that they were embarrased, even though i know without a shadow of a doubt that they loved me. My son was putting pics on his myspace.com website..and he said i was gonna put one of you and i on, but i didnt have any recent ones ..and i dont wanna put ur old ones. I asked why not..he just lowered his head and said...cuz. They never complained that i didnt go to school functions..now they beg me to go. Just little things that add up. I remember as a child my mom was about 300 and I loved her..but I was embarrassed because kids are cruel and I didnt want to be made fun of. My flaw I guess. I recently read an article that said overweight females are the class of people that have the most prejudices. People, friends, aquaintances, all treat me different, even though Im still over weight, I am not the morbidly obese person that I once was. Keep up the good work, and look to those goals. Be the person you can be. Deb 400/256/175

It sounds like you're in a very tough situation, I'm sorry to hear that - but you have to take care of your health as well! You should DEFINETLY see the doctor. You mentioned wanting to be with your family, well the thing is that people that are obese don't have very long life expectancys sorry to say. It's the right thing to do. And we ARE DEFINETLY harder on ourselves! Your family must have appreciated you going out with them, just being there - even though it probably killed you. I just had surgery, and I'm so tired of being an embrassment for my family - the butt of everyone's jokes. As much as my family seems to love me no matter what, on more than one occasion I've heard my older brother making fun of me. It just kills me because I think, if he can say that about me - what is everyone else saying? Or being on the metro and having people my own age laughing at the fat girl. Or people not believing my age because I'm a huge whale. I've just turned the legal age but yet I wouldn't dare step into a nightclub or bar. I wonder how different they will all act towards me in a year!