scared and angry!!!

hi pam. i appreciate hearing from you and the prayers of everyone here, including you, will be in my thoughts tomorrow. you're right about the great advice. that and the much needed perspective will certainly help me get through my monday. thanks again, pam. hugs dorthe

Hi Dorthe, I just wanted to chime in here alittle late with some well wishes to help you get through this difficult time (surgery) I think that sometimes guys just kinda "check-out" when a big crisis arises..that is a coping mechanism that I am all to familiar with living in a family with all males..even the dog is male!! Last year at this time I had my wls and as you can recall, I was in the hospital for 14 days. I actually got out of the hospital today..one year ago. I remember laying in that hospital bed with complication after complication, wondering why my hubby was not at my side the entire time. He worked and my sons worked and/or went to school and could only visit in the evening. I for the life of me couldn't figure out why he(my hubby) was not as attentive as I would had been, I felt that maybe he just didn't care ( can you tell I had allot of time to think about stuff?) One night I just lost it when he came to visit cause he got there around 8:00 and the visiting hours were over at 9:00. Come to find out later...my guys were decorating the house with Christmas lights and stuff so I would be surprized when I got home..I was! Keeping busy was his stress mechanizm! I just know you will be feeling sooo much better healthwise, when you have recovered from this surgery tomorrow..Then...no more surgerys till...ever!!! You are in my thoughts and prayers Dorothe! HugsGinger

hi ginger: thanks so much for sharing that memory with me. i found myself comparing my husband's behavior for my previous surgeries with how i reacted when he had his heart attack two years ago. you're so right. there is no comparison. i did have a short conversation with him again yesterday re: my opinion of his seeming to not even care. what i brought from that talk is that he wishes me well and knows i'll be able to cope, but he'll try to get off work early if he can. so that, along with the messages i've received from the boards here, have given me the sense that I WILL SURVIVE. with or without his presence, i can do this. so i've found at least some of my courage - or is it the meds i'm taking which are making me calm? at any rate, at least i'm going into it with a renewed sense of wanting to come through it and move on. God bless, Ginger. i hope your monday is a good one. i appreciate the thoughts and prayers and will be thinking of them as i head into my procedure. take care, hun hugs dorthe