Depressed and Hibernating...

Hi Everyone, As you can tell from the title I battle severe depression like alot of people do. But now I am to the point where I am Hibernating again. I just hate going out in public... I am just so sick being treated like crap everywhere I go. I can't do much which makes it even more tough. But once again I am going through a phase where I am missing alot of work again. My boss knows I have it and has been very understanding. However, it does not help when you hate your job because its boring. I just don't even care if I go in anymore. Help I need an attitude adjustment. Things have been very hard for me this summer my older brother passed away at 40 y.o. from cancer this summer on july 4th. And I have been fighting barix clinic forever trying to get a date for my surgery and the longer I wait the more depressed I get. sigh... its going to happen even if I have to drive up there and throw a fit. Thanks for listening, Monica F.

Hello Monica, Hello, I understand what you are going through. I feel the "eyes of judgement" everywhere I go, especially from people that I considered my friends. I feel like they are looking at me thinking.."poor Ginger (that's my nick-name) look at what she did to herself." I don't want to go anywhere that I might run into someone I know..even aquaintances. I don't work outside of the home and that's my comfort zone. It is sooo normal to feel isolated and alone in the situation you are in presently. I'm with you on your sorrow too. My dear brother-in-law was diagnoised with Brain cancer in November of this past year. My B in law finally lost his battle with Cancer May 7th after only 3 days in hospice. This has been devastating to my sister and our whole family. He was only 40 yrs old also. Take the overwhelming sorrow of your brother's loss and add the uncertainty of this whole weight loss soap-opera that you are going through, and you end-up with a whole pile of issues!!! I am so glad that you have a very understanding boss. I'm sure that is a great help to you now. In the mean time..keep coming to this website and sharing your "*****y" personality with the rest of us. You are so funny and we are all just bustin' a gut with your witty come backs..keep on laughing with us till you are laughing on the looser's side!!! Take Care Virginia

Hi Monica You know I am right there with you sweetie. When you're ready to go to barix and give them what for... I've got shotgun! Did you call them again today? Now don't faint or anything, but I was actually able to get through to 'you-know-who' today! Love 'n Huggs, Ruth

Hi Ruth, Yes - I called Barix today and I am so upset to the point where I made myself sick. The MA told me that she still does not have my cardiologist report. And also I call the cadrio doc and he said he sent the Second letter over 2 weeks ago! I am so mad. It just makes me wonder if barix would rather see me stay this way. Seems like they just dont care about you if you are self pay. Monica F.

Try asking your cardio doc to fax it to you. That's what I have had to do with at least 50% of the stuff I sent to her. I had to fax it to her myself to ensure she got it! Shouldn't have to be that way, but as you know, she loses everything! Huggs, Ruth

Actually I did one better I called Hillary the ofice manager. And she found my cardio stuff and my folder is now on Dr. K's desk waiting for his aproval. Fingers Crossed! Monica F. Of course it makes it worse when you dont feel good. Temp: 102 I feel yucky.

Oh I am soooo glad Hillary was able to find it for you and get it to Dr. K's desk! It won't be long now! Sorry you are feeling so poorly though. 102 fever?!? Awwww Huggs, Ruth

Hi I am so sorry you are going through this. I am preop as well and can't really offer any advice only that things will look up and get better soon. I know how it is to lose someone you love as I lost my mom to cancer when I was 16 and to this day it is still devastating for me, but as time goes on it will get a little easier. If you ever need to talk feel free to email me. As for the date I kept on the office staffs rear till I got one Take care, Anita

monica(((((((((((hug)))))))))))))) I am really sorry for the loss of your brother. and I can really commiserate with you about depression. I battle it every single day. I, too have been in hibernation since January. i just hate to deal with the world. This board has been my lifeline. take care, monica willby

(((((((((((((Monica)))))))))))))) We are here for you. Please dont feel like you are alone. You have all of us and I plan on meeting you this week and I am going to give you a real great big hug. I was where you are for many years of my life and remember where there is life there is hope. It wont be long now and you will begin a new healthier, happier life. Hang in there girlfriend, Im coming with your seat. Dont try to cause us biguns will find you. Hugs, Sue