Sorry I am not around much...

Hi Everyone, Sorry that I have not been around much. I have been in a lot of pain with my infected tooth. I was suppose to get it out today. But.... the doc had a death in the family. So they rescheduled me for later on this week. Plus i have changed my eating habits and trying so hard to take better care of myself. And for some reason it is taking up most of my extra time. I know it sounds weird, but I have not taken care of myself in a long time. Ever since I was 8 years old I have been taking care of family member in my life. And now for the first time since I was 8 y.o. I have time to finally stop being self-less and start being self-full. I just feel so weird. And I feel so strange not eatting all the time. I am hoping to hear back soon for a surgery date. I am really hoping for this month. Fingers crossed. Thanks for listening & I hope that you are all doing well. Monica F.

Hi Monica, When you are ready to socialize, we will be here. Take care of yourself and dont feel bad that you arent around much. Do what you need to do and we will be here for you when you are ready. Hugs, Soos

Hi Susan, Hmmm... I did not realize that it was even a socializing thing that I was not doing too. Maybe I am hibernating again. I never really thought about it that way this time around. I am really stressed out since I have to pay 100% of my surgery out of my own pocket. And my parents are helping me I have to borrow the money from them. So I have to figure out a way to pay them back when I already live paycheck to paycheck. I asked if I could move back home with them into the unfinished basement. I was told no they want me to stay out on my own. Of course living there would probably drive me insane. But I thought well its either that or live in my car or a cardboard box. I am worried about it I am sure you can tell. Plus just not feeling good does not help either. Thanks for listening, Monica F.

Hi Monica, Sorry about your toothache and your feeling just general ookiness (is that a word?) Anyways, my son just brought home a kind of personality test. They use it at his work as a tool to get to know each co-workers personality traits and thus work better as a team. It's called the Matrixx System. It has color and picture cards. You look at each card and pick the one that mostly describes YOU. I took the quiz. It told me so much about myself...much more than any "shrink" could do. My color was blue. I won't bore you with the details, but something you said strikes me as the same. Esteemed for: Being a good listener -- Stressed by: Feeling artificial --- Highest Virture: Loyalty--- Primary needs: To be authentic and care for others ---- Strive to foster: Harmony. When you said that you are having a hard time finding time to take care of yourself because you have been taking care of others since you were 8 years old. It reminded me of this personality test and having some of the same feelings too. Guess what? I'm pretty sure that we are NORMAL....I hope...don't want to be locked-up fat...they won't have any gowns that fit me right....wait at least till I loose the weight right??? Hugs, Virginia

Monica, I'm sorry that your tooth hurts. There is not much in the world that can compare to a toothache. OUCH!! I surely know what you mean about feeling strange taking time for yourself. The last 27 years have been filled with kids/hubby/job etc etc etc. Now i finally have me time and I dont know what to do with it We missed you and please try to come back more often. If you need us to take care of you we will!! willby

Sorry to hear you aren't feeling well, but I'm sure things will start looking up soon. Way to go for taking care of your self now I know how hard it is to put yourself first, as I've always struggled and still struggle with this. Take care, Anita

Hi Again, I only meant the socializing since we were suppose to get together last week and it never happened. I still have the shower chair, so when you are ready,as soon as you are feeling better, let me know. Hugs, Soos

Hope you tooth is better soon. Take care of you. You are worth it.

((((((((((((((Monica))))))))))))) You and your poor tooth! I hope it comes out soon. I am sure you will feel better then. We're not going anywhere... we'll all be here. Miss ya! Huggs, Ruth

hi monica: i'm so sorry you're still having issues with that tooth. it really does take alot of your mental energy just to deal with the ever present pain. i also know what you mean about taking care of yourself being new. i'm sorry to say that it has been so long since i have taken care of myself that i don't even know what i want anymore. i'm serious. i try to think of my dreams and draw a blank. i try to conjure up goals beyond weight loss and draw another blank. i realize that sounds pathetic and sad, but it is what it is. so take care of yourself, monica. it's good to be in practice and the good lord knows everyone deserves it. healing hugs - good luck with the tooth and the self awareness. dorthe