perspective, please???

so i have this hysterectomy scheduled for nov 7th, right. my husband, smart ass that he is, gave me a picture of the 'seven dwarves of menopause'. thought it was funny, i guess. their names are *****y, moody, sweaty, psycho, forgetful, ... you get the idea. have i lost my sense of humor? or was this just cruel? the more i think about it the more i want to cry. where's the sweetheart i married? is he just getting sick of all my problems? guess i'm in a funk, peeps. sure could use a thanks for any perspective, in advance dorthe

OH Dorthe! (((((big warm boys- are- dumb -throw- rocks- at -them hug)))))))))))) Girl! You are old enough to know that men dont have a clue. Maybe in his own male way he was trying to acknowledge your surgery? This is giving him the benefit of the doubt of course. the only other thing i can think of is that what i read on a bumper sticker WAS right..........."when god created man SHE was only joking" Dont you worry, dorthe..........you always have us.(if you want us or not)lol willby

Hi Dorthe... Sometimes these wonderful men we marry think something is funny that is not. They don't mean to be cruel, they are just clueless sometimes. I'm sure if you told him that he hurt your feelings he would be shocked. (Like I said, clueless.) You're sweetheart is still there, he's just caught up in a juvenile joke that he thought was funny. After you feel better, you may want to tell him that jokes like that aren't funny and you would be happier if he kept them to himself. I know how you feel, I'm in a funk tonight too, and my sweet wonderful hubby has already upset me about 6 times this evening. Clueless. Hang in there, Peggy

Hi Dorthe, First of all ((((((((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))))))). I hope that you feel better. Second I would like to hopefully give you a little insight into your husband's poor timing with his joke. My husband is probably the most caring and thoughtful person I know. He would never intentionly hurt mine or anyone elses feelings. Now with that said I can not tell you how many times he tries to use humor to make me feel better about something that is bothering me or worrying me or whatever. I have to tell you that like you I don't ever seem to find his jokes or levity funny at the time. I have a good sense of humor, but I'm also a serious person so if something is bothering me and he makes a joke about it then to me it's like he's making light or fun of something that is serious to me. I know that he doesn't mean ill will by it; it's just him. I think men feel like they have to fix everything, so if you are down they figure "I need to make her laugh" Unfortunatley they may not do it in the best way. I hope this helps, just my two cents. Kim

oh Dorothe, I'm sorry he did that. I don't think you've lost your sense of humor at all. Sometimes when you're worried about something is the worst time for a joke about it! p.s. I had a hysterectomy 10 years ago, and I'm none of those things!

The Seven Dwarves of Menopause The Seven Dwarfs of Menopause arrived at my door without warning: Itchy, *****y, Sweaty, Sleepy, Bloated, Forgetful and All-Dried-Up. One by one they crept into my own private cottage in the woods and started to take over my life. The first to arrive was Itchy. I developed this itch on my right calf that was so irritating, I wanted to scratch the skin right off my body. Then B*tchy came to my door. No longer was my PMS contained to one or two days a month--it felt like constant PMS. Then I would swing from B*tchy to Weepy for God's sake, what was wrong with me? Ding-dong......It's the middle of the night and Sweaty has crawled into bed with me. Oh, yes, Sweaty brought embarrassing hot flashes and introduced me to night sweats where it seemed as if a faucet had been attached between my breasts. Of course Sweaty brought about Sleepy because I was tired all the time. I would wake up so many times in the night and not be able to get back to sleep. Bloated crept in slowly, my once-svelte figure got thick through the middle section, even though I was following my weight-loss program that had worked so well for so many years! I can't quite remember when Forgetful arrived, but one day my brain stopped working. I considered myself a pretty focused woman until Forgetful came and I could not keep a coherent thought in my brain. Am I getting Alzheimer's? I wondered. Last, All-Dried-Up slowly encroached upon my happy marriage. This was probably the most unpleasant of the dwarf family. Sex was no longer on the top of my list...or on my list at all. My husband would give me that knowing look, and I would think, "Frankly, I'd rather have a smoothie."

DOROTHY (((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))) I AM SO SORRY YOUR HUBBY HURT YOUR FEELINGS I THINK HE WAS TRYING TO MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER I DON'T THINK HE WAS INTENTIONALLY BEING MEAN YOUR EMOTIONS R RUNNING HIGH RIGHT NOW AND HE PROB DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO HANDLE THAT AFTER ALL HE IS A MAN HOPE YOU FEEL BETTER SOON WE R HERE FOR YOU REMEMBER THAT LOVE CANDY

Men are simple animals... I know it sounds mean but they just are. In his mind he was being funny and trying to "cheer you up" AS IF you could be facing this and feel cheered up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! While I think he was being INSENSITIVE........ I don't think he meant to hurt your feelings at all and probably has no clue how upsetting something like that really is. If he were facing a major surgery that would change his life like you are then he'd understand... Because as a woman you'd know this is no time for stupid jokes!! Forgive him or overlook this one... OR Me, Margaret and Willby will help ya bury him in the yard....

Men can be very insensitive sometimes. They say or do something as a joke, that we as women are hurt by. I don't think it is done intentionally, it's just a part of their make up. My father has made me cry more times than I can remember with his 'jokes', and I am always told that I am too sensitive. Go figure. ((((((((((dorthe))))))))) Huggs, Ruth