~~~Not-So-Creepy Corny Halloween Jokes~~~

SipeleK
on 10/31/05 3:22 am - Ames, IA

What do you call a motor bike belonging to a witch ? A broooooooom stick ! Was Dracula ever married ? No, he was a bat-chelor! What do you get if you cross a vampire with Al Capone ? A fangster ! Why are skeletons usually so calm ? Nothing gets under their skin ! What do vampires gamble with ? Stake money ! What sort of group do vampires join ? A blood group ! Why do skeletons hate winter ? Beacuse the cold goes right through them ! What do you call an old and foolish vampire ? A silly old sucker ! Who is a vampire likely to fall in love with ? The girl necks door ! What is red, sweet and bites people ? A jampire ! Why are teachers happy at Halloween parties ? Because there is lots of school spirit ! What happened to the girl who wore a mouse costume to her Halloween party ? The cat are her ! What do witches eat at Halloween ? Spooketti, halloweenies, devils food cake and booberry pie ! A boy went to a Halloween party with a sheet on his head. "Are you a ghost ?" asked his friends "No, I'm an unmade bed !" Another boy went to a Halloween party with a sheet on his head. "Are you an unmade bed ?" asked his friends "No, I'm an undercover agent !" What did the really ugly man do for a living ? He posed for Halloween masks ! Why did the ghost go trick or treating on the top floor ? He was in high spirits ! What happened when the girl dressed as a spoon left the Halloween party ? No one moved, they couldn't stir without her ! Why was the little boy unhappy to win first prize for the best costume at the Halloween party ? Because he just came to pick up his sister ! Why was everyone tickled by the fried chicken at the Halloween party ? Because the feathers were still on the chicken ! Why did the boy carry a clock and a bird on Halloween ? It was for "tick or tweet" ! What do stupid kids do at Halloween ? They carve a face on an apple and go bobbing for pumpkins ! Why don't apples smile when you go bobbing ? Because they're crab apples ! How do you get the most apples when bobbing at Halloween Wear a snorkel When can't you bury people who live opposite a graveyard ? When they're not dead ! What trees do ghouls like best ? Ceme-trees ! What did the baby ghost eat for dinner ? A boo-loney sandwich ! Why are graveyards so noisy ? Because of all the coffin ! How can you tell if a corpse is angry ? It flips its lid ! Why are cemeteries in the middle of towns ? Because they're dead centres ! Where do undertakers go in October ? The hearse of the year show ! How do undertakers speak ? Gravely ! What was written on the hypochondriac's tombstone ? "I told you I was ill" ! Creepy Smolloween! Candy & Sipele