Funny lighter side story to tell~~~

I love the lighter side of our jobs.......... I had a lady call last night just raising all heck about she wanted her man out of her house "cause he's acting the fool". I asked her if there were any weapons involved (protocol you know) She said "Why no, not yet.....but I do have a kitchen slam full of knives & such." Then she starts yelling at her "Man" and says "Yes fool.... I'm calling the police on your dumb a**. I done told you not to be threatening me. I've had enough of you. You better limp your crippled self down those stairs before I roll your sorry tail down em'" I was trying my best to hold back the laughter and was about in tears. She then tells me the cops are there, and that he's hobbling out the front door. I asked her if he was handicapped or injured and she said "Shoot no, child. He had hip replacement surgery and can only go side to side, not straight. If he tries to give the cops a hard time, tell em' not to hit him in his right hip, cause we done paid too much money for it. They can hit or kick him in the left one though". I thought I would die!!! When I hung up, we played that call back at least 10 times to let everyone laugh! Sherri

You gotta love the funny calls... People will surprise you once in a while, it is a nice break from all the serious stuff. thanks for sharing.. working overnights, we don't get much of anything (that's the problem with a small county) I miss the fun of day shift that is when we got the best calls!

That is too funny. I love when I get stuff like that. It makes the day a lot more bearable. I know what you mean about trying to hold back the laughter. It's not easy sometimes. I once had a really belligerent (sp?) drunk yelling at me that we were violating his civil rights by keeping him in custody. I almost peed myself when I said "Sir, the officer told you you're free to go at anytime. You were never the one under arrest" and he responded by asking me how he could leave when we have locked up in this little cell. I said "Sir, you're in the lobby and the door isn't locked". He said, I am? Well then what the hell am I doing here? I almost fell over. He then proceeded to harrass me about having one of the officers drive him home. I told him I'd call him a cab and he agreed, but he refused to tell me where it would be taking him. We had to spend about 10 minutes explaining to him that if we don't tell them where they're going, they won't pick you up. He was a moron, but very entertaining. Oh, and he claimed to be in the miltary, which was a lie, and called himself Commander Mad Dog. Carol

We have an elderly woman whom our whole center is familiar with. She calls about once every two weeks or so. Her complaint? The Mexican Gamma Ray Machines in the basement of her neighbors' house. There are two of those machines down there and they shoot lasers through the TV antenna to her house and cause the lights to blink, the phone to go out and her fridge to short out. Poor lady. She is sooooo serious about this problem when she calls. Actually, it's pretty tragic. The officers who have responded and gone inside her house say it's just a REALLY old house with REALLY bad wiring. I just hope the poor thing doesn't call in that her house is on fire one day because of a short in the wiring. If and until then, I'll still get a kick out of the Mexican Gamma Ray Machines. ~Victoria

That is too funny!! I love it. We have an elderly lady who calls in at least twice a month that the rapper who got shot and killed a few years back, "Tupac Shakur" is alive and digging up her back yard. I love it though. She is sooooo silly, but serious. She went and got herself a vicious pot belly pig and named him "The Notorious Big" after the other rapper who got killed. Supposedly they were in rival gangs or something. Anyway, our officers always ask her to "lock up the Notorious PIG" when they get there, because he does bite. It ticks her off. She starts yelling "That's Notorious Big, you fools, he's Biggie Smalls" Amazing how funny stuff like that lifts our spirits. Sherri

Hehe. Notorious Viscious BIG Pig. I was in total shock about six months after I started this job. I never realized just how many totally delusional people there are running around out there. My community isn't all that big (105,000 or so in the whole county), but we sure have our share of mentally unstable folks. Some are downright funny, while some are downright scary and a true threat to society at times. You just don't look at people the same when you're in public after you've been doing this for a while. ~Victoria