Traveling and dealing with grief as a newly post-op.

(deactivated member)
on 10/30/09 11:49 pm

My mother-in-law passed away yesterday. We are driving up to Utica, NY (5 1/2 hour drive) today. Her funeral service is tomorrow.

All I want to do is hold my husband and cry and grieve and not worry about anything else, but I know I have to take care of myself. I am having a little panic attack at the prospect of traveling, dealing with all these family gatherings, and doing everything I need to do for myself. I developed thrush, so now I need to do a 4x daily oral rinse along with the injections, meds and vites I already have to take. Then there's trying to get in my fluids, and protein, and walking around enough so I don't get a blood clot. Not to mention still figuring out what does and doesn't agree with me.

Anyway, I'm just feeling sad and overwhelmed and wanting to vent. If anyone has dealt with a similar situation, I would appreciate any suggestions on getting through it. Thanks for listening.

Lisey
on 10/30/09 11:55 pm - Milwaukee suburb, WI

DS on 03/24/09

Recovering from recent surgery with fresh grief? I've never had both at the same time & I'm so sorry for your struggles - emotionally & physically. I know that you know you need to take care of yourself & are feeling overwhelmed (I would too!). I would guess that in the ensuing days, there will be many moments in which it will be easier to simply ignore something you need to do to take of yourself. Since you're so close to surgery, it's a higher risk period, so I think you should remind yourself in those moments that any kind of negative health effects that might occur from not doing something for yourself will make it worse for absolutely everyone involved. Just focus on small steps - what do I need to do next vs I have 20 things to do today & 25 tomorrow, etc - that's just overwhelming when you think of everything all together. One step at a time & you will make it through!

HW / SW / CW / GW 299 / 287 / 160 / 140 Feb '09 / Mar '09 / Dec '13 /Aug '10

Appendicitis/Bowel Obstruction Surgery 8/21/10
Beat Hodgkin's Lymphoma! 7/15/2011 - 1/26/2012

Ran Half-Marathon 10/14/2012

First Pregnancy, Due 8/12/14 I LOVE MY DS!!!

(deactivated member)
on 10/30/09 11:57 pm, edited 10/30/09 11:57 pm

(deactivated member) has deleted this message.

Tassia
on 10/31/09 12:03 am

DS on 11/18/09

Jenna, I haven't had the experience you're dealing with, but please, take care of yourself. Sending peaceful thoughts your way.

Anna

* Take 1 DS, add a little p90x and stir :)
5' 3" HW 293/SW 253/Goal 130/CW 128

Steph anie
on 10/31/09 12:15 am - Denton, TX

DS on 09/22/08

Of course you are feeling overwhelmed right now--that is completely normal! I am so sorry that you are having to go through this on top of recovering from surgery.

I don't have any suggestions for dealing with this particular situation. However, I do have a few critters around here who are about to start swinging for you.

HW 318/ SW 308/ CW 116/ GW 125 (updated 11/11/09)

Follow my journey at: http://savoringmyjourney.wordpress.com/

Get all the facts at www.DSfacts.com.

Century Club 03/27/09 Onderland 04/15/09 Goal Met: 02/26/10

traciejo1972
on 10/31/09 1:33 pm

DS on 08/10/09

*HIJACK*

Stephanie you are SMOKIN HOTTTTTTT there girl! You are looking absolutely BEAUTIFUL!!!!!! LOVE the new avi!

Congrats on your much deserved success!

Getting excited about my future! God is AWESOME!

HW/SW/CW/GW updated 3/29/11
369/341/194/175

Steph anie
on 11/1/09 1:18 am - Denton, TX

DS on 09/22/08

Thanks TracieJo! You are so sweet for saying something.

HW 318/ SW 308/ CW 116/ GW 125 (updated 11/11/09)

Follow my journey at: http://savoringmyjourney.wordpress.com/

Get all the facts at www.DSfacts.com.

Century Club 03/27/09 Onderland 04/15/09 Goal Met: 02/26/10

Frances S.
on 10/31/09 12:19 am - Zachary, LA

VSG on 05/26/09

I'm so very sorry to hear about your mother-in-law. As hard as it might seem, your No. 1 job is to take care of yourself mentally and physically. Finding a quiet place to breathe or going into the car to listen to music alone might be some good mini-getaways.

I also highly recommend the power of touch -- hugs, kisses, hands. Hold on to those you love and share strengthen and support. When my husband and I have dealt with tragedy, we have taken turns being "the strong one." And I enjoy the comfort of his touch and it helps me relieve my mountain of stress.

Your postop care is like a demanding hobby right now that will pay off majorly in the long run. Anyone who disagrees with you will have to screw off until later.

I will be traveling today also and as I look out my car window into the tranquil trees or rolling hills, I will say a prayer for you and your husband. Be strong and know you are cared for and loved.

Best,
Frances

A Banded Brain! (read blog)
"Banded for life, switched for good, bypassed by none" (revised, work in progress)

Redhaired
on 10/31/09 12:35 am - Mouseville, FL

DS on 07/13/06

I am so sorry for your loss. Just remember the only thing that is an absolute is fluid and clot prevention. You have to get your fluids in and I assume you are referring to lovenox shots. Fluid and shot -- vitamins can wait a day or two if it all becomes too much for you.

Again my most sincere condolences.

Red

Kerry J.
on 10/31/09 12:58 am - Santa Clara, UT

DS on 09/17/08

Wow Jenna, that has to be tough; please take care of yourself first.

Kerry

Traveling and dealing with grief as a newly post-op.

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Traveling and dealing with grief as a newly post-op.