I'm here lyrking in the background

Elaine- I am so sorry for your loss. I wish I had something wonderful to say, something that would comfort you or something that would some how lift the hurt from your heart, but I do not have the words, I can only offer my friendship and my love to you at this time and tell you that you are not alone. You are in my thoughts and in my prayers. Please take care of yourself. Red

My dear Elaine, I wish I could find the words to comfort you during this sad anniversary but I'm at a loss. I do know the devastating feelings can be utterly unbearable for the parent. I lost my sister when I was 9 and she was 12 and to this day, some 40 years later, my parents still go through a greiving period during her anniversary month. Allow yourself to grieve my dear. Please try to take care of yourself during this time. It's oh so important for you to get that protein in now that you're getting further out. Tuna fish is a good, high and inexpensive way to get in protein. You have my number if you ever feel like calling - I'm always here. God bless you and comfort you. Hugs, Maureen

Well, wow ... I don't think there can BE a worse pain than losing a child. My thoughts and prayers are with you right now, Elaine. Alison

I know there are no words, no words. Nothing worse than outliving our precious children. My tears are shed with you. We lost an infant son, a twin, and before his birthday I always wonder what if. . . . And of course, there's my dear, departed, beloved husband. I've learned that I start unconsciously grieving him a month ahead of the anniversay. So much death in my family. My mother's anniversary is tomorrow. She was 86 and I still think it was too soon. In the end, we endure, don't we. Roz

(((((((hugs))))))) I'm so sorry you're in such pain. There is nothing like the pain of loosing a child, it becomes part of your life tapestry that despite wanting to tear it out, would unravel the fabric...and so you keep it and try to go on and work around it...although it is always there. I've heard it described as being similar to the "phantom pain" amputees sometimes experience when they "feel" the missing body part. There is a group in our area called Compassionate Friends, I don't know if they are national, but they may be worth looking into...also, is there a hospice organization in your area? They usually will offer bereavement groups as part of grief therapy. You've come to learn that eating through the pain does not make it go away, and being depressed makes it hard to feel motivated to try anything new to cope with the situation. My prayer for you right now is that you feel your daughter's presence in your heart and can find comfort in your loss through people who love you (like us).