It's Monday again...
Chris my take on this is just what you said that he said... he was scared that he was going to lose you or that you would change. I hear this alot with people that are involved too (married, seeing someone) that they don't want their SO to have the surgery because they are afraid of the changes they are going to make. They always say that a relationship that was strong before surgery will remain strong after and if it is having troubles or not too stable that there is going to be more work involved to keep it together.
This is just something I was thinking about 
is it possible that he has some feelings for you that you are not picking up on? Is he worried that you are going to get all sexified and get all these hot men lusting after you and then he will lose any chance that he thought he might have with you? Just a thought 
My suggestion is yeah it might be hard to supportive back to him since he wasn't to you but remember how it made you feel when he wasn't supportive to you. I know it sucks but be the better person.
is it possible that he has some feelings for you that you are not picking up on? Is he worried that you are going to get all sexified and get all these hot men lusting after you and then he will lose any chance that he thought he might have with you? Just a thought
My suggestion is yeah it might be hard to supportive back to him since he wasn't to you but remember how it made you feel when he wasn't supportive to you. I know it sucks but be the better person. 
Hi Barb,
The bad part is....if you're right.....he's married. Although when we first met he and his wife were having problems and he and I got to be very close. We never stepped over the line....but there was definitely something more between us than just friends. However he and his wife worked things out and we remained really good friends. In fact, his wife has become a friend and has never had any problem with my calling him or going out with him.
But what you say makes perfect sense. I do wonder now if the problem is that I'm moving on without him. I mean....after he and his wife worked things out, I was still there for him. He had the best of both worlds...his wife and his 'second' wife (as I was once referred to as being by someone that didn't like how close we were). I was still the same old Chris. Maybe he is jealous/worried that I'll find someone and move on and that we'd lose that strange connection that we've had for years.
Although, honestly, I'm ready to move on. I still want him as one of my best friends....but I don't want the role as 'second' wife anymore. I finally realize that I'm worth more than being second anything....and I'm ready to be the 'first' in someone's life.
So being supportive seems to be what a good friend would do....and I do want to be a good friend. I've just never been very good at turning the other cheek!
Ok you failed to mention that one small little detail "he's married" thats ok. 
But, I guess it is normal persay (I would think) for married men/women to have feelings for another woman/man as long as they are not being acted upon. But if you are getting to the point where you are being considered the "second" anything then there is a cause for concern because you are right you are DEFINATELY better than second best on any account for anything. You definately do deserve better than that.
I personally think that jealousy is playing a HUGE role in this right how. He can't "have you" and so he doesn't want others to have you either. Yeah emotionally you are there to be a sounding board but I think deep down he was probably wishing there was more or at the least that his wife could be there emotionally as much as what you are. You are right he does have the best of both worlds. There are just somethings that some people connect better on while others don't. Now if we could just take all the good of the not so perfect person we found and make one person we'd all have it made but since that is not an option, we gotta take what we can get persay. Does that make sense?
Just becareful that YOU don't get hurt in all this because jealousy can be an evil thing and can hurt alot of people. Just remain true to yourself and believe that you ARE worth it.
You know that poem comes to mind "everyone comes into our life for a reason, season, or a lifetime" or something like that.
I personally think that you came into his life at a time when he really needed a friend and person to confide in but now maybe it is time to cut that tie and just say what I have came to do here is done so it is time for me to move on. Yeah it will be hard but you know that he is not available and if he is thinking more along the lines of I can have my cake and eat it too I will do that and what does that do for you? Especially now if he is not going to be verbally supportive to you.... when you were there for him. Doesn't make sense I am sorry. Weather a person believes in the surgery as an option or not I think that a person needs to be supportive especially if you are friends... if you are strangers.... not so much because they will probably say what they gotta say and you will never see them again. I know I am babbling but I guess what I am trying to say is that when a person has alot of negative feedback or support towards someone that is having surgery it alot of fear, jealousy, the unknown and not being totally educated on the subject.
Take care of YOU chris because YOU are worth it!! ((hugs))
But, I guess it is normal persay (I would think) for married men/women to have feelings for another woman/man as long as they are not being acted upon. But if you are getting to the point where you are being considered the "second" anything then there is a cause for concern because you are right you are DEFINATELY better than second best on any account for anything. You definately do deserve better than that.
I personally think that jealousy is playing a HUGE role in this right how. He can't "have you" and so he doesn't want others to have you either. Yeah emotionally you are there to be a sounding board but I think deep down he was probably wishing there was more or at the least that his wife could be there emotionally as much as what you are. You are right he does have the best of both worlds. There are just somethings that some people connect better on while others don't. Now if we could just take all the good of the not so perfect person we found and make one person we'd all have it made but since that is not an option, we gotta take what we can get persay. Does that make sense?
Just becareful that YOU don't get hurt in all this because jealousy can be an evil thing and can hurt alot of people. Just remain true to yourself and believe that you ARE worth it.
You know that poem comes to mind "everyone comes into our life for a reason, season, or a lifetime" or something like that.
I personally think that you came into his life at a time when he really needed a friend and person to confide in but now maybe it is time to cut that tie and just say what I have came to do here is done so it is time for me to move on. Yeah it will be hard but you know that he is not available and if he is thinking more along the lines of I can have my cake and eat it too I will do that and what does that do for you? Especially now if he is not going to be verbally supportive to you.... when you were there for him. Doesn't make sense I am sorry. Weather a person believes in the surgery as an option or not I think that a person needs to be supportive especially if you are friends... if you are strangers.... not so much because they will probably say what they gotta say and you will never see them again. I know I am babbling but I guess what I am trying to say is that when a person has alot of negative feedback or support towards someone that is having surgery it alot of fear, jealousy, the unknown and not being totally educated on the subject.
Take care of YOU chris because YOU are worth it!! ((hugs)) 
Chris!
Its Monday and my buttocks is sore from riding Carson the 
Have a great day.. I am in need of more 
Hugs
Julie 
Tell Greg to rub your sore heinie for you!
I can't wait to come up and party with you all! We'll have to plan it soon!
Chris 
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