Dealing with DOUBT!!

Hello Everyone.. I am a lurker.  Have been one for so many months.  Decided to jump in and participate and take advantange of all your knowledge and experience.   My question.. How did you deal with the doubt? I am a Kaiser member and I have started the "6 Month" counseling and nutritional consults about 3 or 4 times over the last 3 years.  I think I've made up my mind to have the surgery, then the DOUBTS start to crept in.   How did you finally cast away the doubts, put away the fear, and go forth and be HAPPY with your decision???  I have started again and plan to see it though this time.  So hopefully by the end of the year, it will be my time.

You know it just happened for me over night.  I said there is no way in hell I will ever do this. I am on the self esteem train and if you want on, you need to go to the end of the line.  Then I got tired of my diabetes and I am sick of food.  I am ready to give up all that eating to live longer.  I think you really have to dig deep and say to yourself are ready, are ready to live again and let go of the food. I wish you all the luck! I say just go for it! Kristen

First, aI made a list of the pros and cons. Then I looked at my two little girls and realized I had to be here for them, and I wasn't going to let the kids taunt them about having a fat mom. Then, as I thought some more, I realized that I owe this TO ME! I want to be healthy and live a longer life and enjoy it more than ever! (AND I AM!!) The doubt will drift in and out up to the time when you are waiting to go into the surgery room. Then, you will suddenly be overcome with excitement, and it's all over -- you're in recovery and are even more excited to start on your journey. I am 3 mos. out, have no regrets, and will never look back. Good luck in your decision making. Everyone is different and has different reasons; just be able to live with your choice. ~~ Trish

Hi. I just had my DS surgery with Dr. S on 8/14. I did this because I came to the realization and acceptance that I was unable to lose weight and keep it off no matter what I did. My body hurt and I was still lucky to have no real co-morbidities but I knew diabetes and heart disease and high blood pressure was waiting for me right around the corner. I decided that I wanted to enjoy life with my husband and at a 60+ BMI it wasn't possible. I want to be here for my son and be the kind of grandparent who can take grandchildren to disneyworld. I knew I would die prematurly and I choose WLS to live. Best of luck as you make these decisions. Jo

Finding this website is what helped me with my fears and doubts. Everyday beofre I hadmy surgery I would look at the before and after pictures. I am now 10 months post op. I am so glad I found this site and this family.

Looks like you and I are in the same boat. I too am a Kaiser patient.  I have my last visit with the nutrionist this week. Am I 100% sure that I want to have the surgery - no.  Do I know why - no. I have met many wonderful people from this board at the Support Group meetings.  These ladies are extremely honest and go out of their way to answer ANY question you have. Having fears and doubts before any surgery is normal.  This surgery is a big change in the way you currenly know life, but a can truly say that I am leaning more and more towards it. Do your research and don't be afraid to ask questions.  You'll come up with the correct answer for you. Barb

I knew if I didnt. I would never feel better on my own. 5weeks out and I feel great. Never sick once. Thank god. Goodluck to you.  

Hi and welcome to the world of posters.   You've started with a really good question because it's one that many of us have struggled with. The idea of WLS was first presented to me by my PCP in August 2001.   I did some research and was interested .. but also apprehensive.   It took 2 1/2 years of thinking about it on and off and trying yet 'one more diet' several times before I reached the point of .. YES !!!  I need to do this.   I made a couple of appointments for consultations and believe me that was very emotional.   After I made the first appointment I sat and cried because I was so scared.   Once I saw the first doctor though, I was more emotionally ready to see the 2nd surgeon and I chose him for my surgery.   My journey was relatively quick, I saw the first doctor on January 15, 2004 and had my surgery with the 2nd on March 22, 2004.   I 'knew' it was time. My BMI was 50.1, high blood pressure, fatty liver disease, borderline diabetic, probably mild sleep apnea (never had a sleep test), osteoarthritis .. and probably more ... I really cannot say for sure that I will live longer having had WLS, but I can say that I will be able to live the life I have left more fully and enjoy it rather than sit on the sidelines and watch the world go by. Best wishes as your WLS journey continues. Hugs, Mo

I'm so excited to get all your replys...  I really know that this is something I need to do.  Since I had my son almost eight year ago, my weight has just crept up and up...  I now see how dramatic the changes in my life are now because of it:  I limit myself in the things I do, where I go, spending time with friends and family.  I know I am not the wife and mother I should be.  With my BMI of 60+, I know it is just a matter of time before I start to experience more serious health issues.  I am currently dealing with hypertension.   Part of the requirements this go around with Kaiser is to participate in a support group, either at Holy Cross in Silver Spring or GW in DC.  I am hoping this will definitely give my the "boost" to keep going.  Hearing from everyone is also a help. I'm going to keep going.  I feel sometimes in my heart that I can lose the 100+ on my own, but the reality of it is.. If I could I would have already done it.  Don't you think. I'm casting  aside to discouragement and moving forward. Thanks,

Part of the requirements this go around with Kaiser is to participate in a support group, either at Holy Cross in Silver Spring or GW in DC.   I was told the same thing - don't believe it.  Talk with your nutrionist.  I praise this board and these people and she said that it was fine - I didn't have to to to Holy Cross of GW. She did say that the only advantage of going to either one of those support groups was that you may have a chance to meet the doctor. Since Kaiser now deals with hospitals other than these two, I felt why bother driving so far when I have a great support group right in my back yard. Of course, if I do have to go to Holy Cross or GW, then I will attend one of their support groups. Talk with your nutrionist! Barb