Last Night's Support Group Meeting...

Nessa,

The first sentence in Tia's reply shows that she was happy for you.  The rest of her response, as she pointed out, was a result of things she's been thinking about, based upon conversations in person as well as previous posts you've made.  She just happened to include it in the reply to this thread...after she conveyed her happiness at your news.  In no way was she "shooting you down" , attacking you, or saying that in this particular post you were being overly concerned with your husband. 

Now, that being said.  I'm happy about your news and hope that you have a date soonest!!

 

Heather

 

Thank you Heather.

The problem is that it was not the time or the place for Tia to correct my thinking (yet again)

if she felt the need to express concern to me about my inappropirate concern for my husband and her concern about my lack of self-concern, then maybe a PM would have been a better option.

Maybe but many times things that are posted to other people serve to help those that it's not even directed at.  I don't think she was trying to correct your thinking but instead was trying to help ease your journey. 

Of course it's not in inappropriate to be concerned about Brian, and I don't recall reading that word anywhere, but it's VERY important to focus on yourself as well.  In previous posts you've compared your journeys thus far and have expressed dis-satisfaction with yours as compared to his.  That is honestly not healthy because everyone's journey is different.

Just my honest opinion!

and i welcome that.

how sad that Everyone here but me interprets my concern for my husband as lack of concern for me and interprets my reporting on him as my frustration with me.

It's funny I guess if you all see it that way then your concern is justified.

I don't see it that way at all.
And I don't for one second see my being frustrated because HE'S doing BETTER than I am.  I am frustrated that I'm not doing well myself but I would be just as frustrated whether I was married or not.

I dont know what all was said because I was 24 hours without Internet but I am reading some now. I think its hard to tell anyones "tone" from emails or board postings. I can say that everyone is bound to give their own opinions on every topic and we are not all always going to agree. That is what makes the world go around. I dont know what the hype is over you caring for your husband. Cira did that as well when we husband went through surgery as did others on this board when their spouses had surgery too. I would be ALL OVER HERE in suport of my husband. So there is NOTHING wrong with you caring or showing support for your hubby. DO IT PROUDLY! ;o)

I will say I dont think anything too personal and nor should you sweetie. LIFE IS TOO SHORT! And there are NO BOARD LEADERS! Yes some people have a lot more time to be on here then most because they are not as busy at home or work BUT that just makes them a great support. I dont get to post more then a dozen times in a month but it doesnt mean I dont read them or I dont care. I private email a lot of people on here. Some things are not meant to be on this board like conflict and bickering. That is not what this board is for and my world is a DRAMA FREE ZONE! ;o)~

So dust your shoulders off and move on honey. (((Hugs)))) Love ~Jilly~

Charliegirlten, You are on the $$$$$. We all have issues that surround us and most of it is about our weight. I thought this was a great place for support and I have talked to some good people her and got some good advice, but as with anything if you post it you need to be ready for advice and opinions opinion. Just because I feel something or interpret something does not mean that all will feel the same or interpret it the same way.  This is a support board and that's what I have tried to do. I don't want to hurt any ones feelings and I wish well for all here and all coming..

                                                                                     Julie

I'm wondering if my reading skills are getting rusty. I'm not reading the same thing you are here Nessa.

what are you reading Kathy?

since Tia and Candy have me blocked I can't see what they said any more.

I was reading your words, about how things turned negative against you. If your husband was here posting, you'd see the same thing... telling him not to forget about himself while he supported you. But, you are here, so people are telling you not to forget about yourself while you support him. Why you took this so negatively is beyond my understanding, and I'm a fairly intelligent person.

where in my original post did I talk about my husband?