Update on the continuing saga of "Me and My Food"
A few weeks back I posted about my issues with food choices, volumes and emotional eating. It was great to get such wonderful feedback and support. I just wanted to post an update for anyone interested, and also as a way to keep myself connected with others on the same path.
In my first post I acknowledged that I needed to get into therapy. One person suggested the Emily Program. I checked out the website and thought "Whoa, this is for eating disorders. I certainly don't have an eating disorder." But the more I read, the more I realized that I have disordered thoughts about food. I make poor choices because I think that food makes me feel loved and enough. Now food can't actually show me love! But the fact that I feel loved by food is in fact quite disordered. So I have done the initial testing and assessment, and will have the follow-up intake appointment this week. I've very much looking forward to it.
But I still struggle. I was at work this weekend. Today someone brought in a huge pan of bars.........with chocolate...........and caramel.........and the great brown sugar-n-oatmeal topping. I was thinking Damn Damn Damn!! Every time I went into the break room I thought "remember why you had surgery." I kept finding reasons to go back there to look at the pan (can someone say "masochist"?). On my last trip discovered that the pan was gone. I went the whole freakin' day without having any sweets even though they were sitting right there!! This was the first time in over a month that I didn't give in to a craving.
I do feel a little more empowered. Now I don't know what tomorrow will bring, but I'm feeling good today.
Just thought I'd share. Thanks for listening!
Wendy
In my first post I acknowledged that I needed to get into therapy. One person suggested the Emily Program. I checked out the website and thought "Whoa, this is for eating disorders. I certainly don't have an eating disorder." But the more I read, the more I realized that I have disordered thoughts about food. I make poor choices because I think that food makes me feel loved and enough. Now food can't actually show me love! But the fact that I feel loved by food is in fact quite disordered. So I have done the initial testing and assessment, and will have the follow-up intake appointment this week. I've very much looking forward to it.
But I still struggle. I was at work this weekend. Today someone brought in a huge pan of bars.........with chocolate...........and caramel.........and the great brown sugar-n-oatmeal topping. I was thinking Damn Damn Damn!! Every time I went into the break room I thought "remember why you had surgery." I kept finding reasons to go back there to look at the pan (can someone say "masochist"?). On my last trip discovered that the pan was gone. I went the whole freakin' day without having any sweets even though they were sitting right there!! This was the first time in over a month that I didn't give in to a craving.
I do feel a little more empowered. Now I don't know what tomorrow will bring, but I'm feeling good today.
Just thought I'd share. Thanks for listening!
Wendy
Wendy - It's a big step to acknowledge issues and decide therapy is needed for your eating issues. I'm so glad I found someone to talk to before surgery, and I can continue seeing her to deal with new issues as they arise after.
And what a great day you had, not touching those evil bars! Not giving into a craving so very empowering, congratulations!
And what a great day you had, not touching those evil bars! Not giving into a craving so very empowering, congratulations!
Kristy (weight loss below does not include 16lbs lost during pre WLS diet)
START: 325 Day of Surgery :309 GOAL: 180
Great Job Wendy!!
It is great that you did the intake through the Emily Program. I have thought about going there, but am going to try working with the therapist that my psychiatrist recommended first.
As for beating out the bars- WAY TO GO!!!! Isn't it an awesome feeling when you can see something that you know is not a good choice and keep on walking! Youmay have gone to look, but you didn't taste!!
Keep up the good work!
Reenie
It is great that you did the intake through the Emily Program. I have thought about going there, but am going to try working with the therapist that my psychiatrist recommended first.
As for beating out the bars- WAY TO GO!!!! Isn't it an awesome feeling when you can see something that you know is not a good choice and keep on walking! Youmay have gone to look, but you didn't taste!!
Keep up the good work!
Reenie
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