Why I quit going to coffee groups
I have been doing a lot of thinking and I decided I am going to post about this because maybe someone else can relate.
When I first signed on to OH, the support on the board was just incredible. I found that people actually understood obesity and how it negatively impacted their life. I felt the same way and it was so good to have people around me that could relate. It was a safe place to be in a way.
As time went on, all those I bonded with were getting surgery approvals left and right. I was waiting 'til 2008 so that I could get health insurance through my employer as hubby's employer excludes WLS of all types. 2008 came. Got on their insurance, jumped all the hoops, and was denied. Now we're almost at the end of 2008 and my second appeal is in so this month will be it for me. Either I'm approved or I'm not. Either way, I am okay with the decision because it's not in my hands to decide. I've come to terms with that. And even though I got laid off, I'm willing to pay even a higher price and Cobra their insurance so that if the approval comes, I can go ahead with surgery on 12/23.
But to be honest, I had to quit going to coffee groups. I would see all of you "melt" and I was so excited to watch your progress but inside after I would leave, the pain was overwhelming for me. I want to kick obesity's butt so bad for my own health. I don't talk about the emotional stress and strain of going through this appeal process because I have chosen not to (well up to this point anyhow).
It's known that I am going for the DS and it's a big surgery. Most of the DS patients do have to fight for coverage. I'm not alone in that battle. But it's by choice. I could have had the band or the RNY, but based on my research, the DS was the right surgery for me. I had the time to pursue it. I wasn't a medical ticking time bomb. Well, guess what? That isn't true. We might think we are healthy albeit overweight, but the truth is, we're not at all healthy. At the time, I thought I fairly was. But within 6 months I was diagnosed with Type II diabetes and sleep apnea. Even when we feel healthy, being MO is affecting us every day whether we realize it or not.
I know it's extremely selfish as to why I stopped going to coffee and even being on OH all the time like I used to, but I had to be okay with it because the emotional part was getting to be too much.
Sorry if I rambled...my thoughts are all over the place.
From the bottom of my heart though, I'm so proud of all of you for taking action against your obesity and coming out on the winning side, I truly honestly am! I love seeing your updates. I just cannot wait to be with you!
God bless your day.
When I first signed on to OH, the support on the board was just incredible. I found that people actually understood obesity and how it negatively impacted their life. I felt the same way and it was so good to have people around me that could relate. It was a safe place to be in a way.
As time went on, all those I bonded with were getting surgery approvals left and right. I was waiting 'til 2008 so that I could get health insurance through my employer as hubby's employer excludes WLS of all types. 2008 came. Got on their insurance, jumped all the hoops, and was denied. Now we're almost at the end of 2008 and my second appeal is in so this month will be it for me. Either I'm approved or I'm not. Either way, I am okay with the decision because it's not in my hands to decide. I've come to terms with that. And even though I got laid off, I'm willing to pay even a higher price and Cobra their insurance so that if the approval comes, I can go ahead with surgery on 12/23.
But to be honest, I had to quit going to coffee groups. I would see all of you "melt" and I was so excited to watch your progress but inside after I would leave, the pain was overwhelming for me. I want to kick obesity's butt so bad for my own health. I don't talk about the emotional stress and strain of going through this appeal process because I have chosen not to (well up to this point anyhow).
It's known that I am going for the DS and it's a big surgery. Most of the DS patients do have to fight for coverage. I'm not alone in that battle. But it's by choice. I could have had the band or the RNY, but based on my research, the DS was the right surgery for me. I had the time to pursue it. I wasn't a medical ticking time bomb. Well, guess what? That isn't true. We might think we are healthy albeit overweight, but the truth is, we're not at all healthy. At the time, I thought I fairly was. But within 6 months I was diagnosed with Type II diabetes and sleep apnea. Even when we feel healthy, being MO is affecting us every day whether we realize it or not.
I know it's extremely selfish as to why I stopped going to coffee and even being on OH all the time like I used to, but I had to be okay with it because the emotional part was getting to be too much.
Sorry if I rambled...my thoughts are all over the place.
From the bottom of my heart though, I'm so proud of all of you for taking action against your obesity and coming out on the winning side, I truly honestly am! I love seeing your updates. I just cannot wait to be with you!
God bless your day.
I completely understand Amy and your feelings are very normal... I, too, would not be able to stand seeing everyone shrink around me. You need to do what you need to do for yourself. That's all that matters. :)
You are not being selfish at all. It takes a special brand of courage to keep on fighting through and around obstacles when you know something is right for you and the path forward proves difficult. While I do understand how hard it is for you to see other people melt away while you wait and wait for insurance approval, it is also kind of ironic since I don't exactly see the changes that have taken place in my own body, even coming up on 6 months post-surgery. I am pretty sure many of those attending coffee groups are in the same boat. In any event, I do hope you will keep posting here regardless of your coffee group participation. I have found your posts here to be both insightful and caring; something many of us truly need after the fact. Trudge on, dear friend, your day will come and the results will be glorious!
RP
Oh Amy, what a HUGE thing for you to come here with! You have been one of the BEST cheerleaders here, and all the while you were hurting because you haven't had YOUR surgery yet? BLESS YOUR HEART!!!
You stay away if you must, but please know that I am SO willing to hook up with you solo, as we've done in the past, if that's easier on you. And for what it's worth, I don't feel any different on the inside than I did when we first met! I often think I will ALWAYS be obese in my head, and that's okay, because I think it keeps a person humble.
THANK YOU for sharing this. I will be SO THRILLED when it's YOUR TURN to have your surgery - I said it when your recent appeal went in, THERE IS NO ONE MORE DESERVING than you!
You stay away if you must, but please know that I am SO willing to hook up with you solo, as we've done in the past, if that's easier on you. And for what it's worth, I don't feel any different on the inside than I did when we first met! I often think I will ALWAYS be obese in my head, and that's okay, because I think it keeps a person humble.
THANK YOU for sharing this. I will be SO THRILLED when it's YOUR TURN to have your surgery - I said it when your recent appeal went in, THERE IS NO ONE MORE DESERVING than you!
Imperfect does not = unsuccessful
I have never met you, but have read your posts and know about your struggle getting your surgery approved. YOU ARE NOT AT ALL SELFISH!!! You have had a really hard time that would have caused most of us to give up, but you have stuck with it, and you are a very admirable person. I don't blame you at all for finding it difficult to watch other people shrinking before your eyes while you're still waiting. Despite that , I've seen you be a tireless cheerleader for everyone else on the board. You have every right to feel however you feel, and I hope you are finding support in your wait for approval. I wish you the very best. God bless! Renee
I truely understand all of your feelings and offer my support any time. It's just so dang unfair that you have to go through such difficulty getting approved. You are not selfish at all.
You are in my prayers sweetie.
You are in my prayers sweetie.
~ SANDY ~ 5'9" HW 291/SW 274/GW 174/CW 155
Starting BMI 40.4 Extremly Obese ~ Current BMI 22.8 Normal
Wow, I don't know what to say, several things actually...........................
I understand
Don't give up
Don't make me slap you
I wish there was something I could say to make you feel better, but believe it or not (and I'm sure you do) it's not easy for anyone, we all struggle from time to time, so it might seem like melting, but it's actually sometimes a slow drip!
hang in there mamma~! and please don't go away regardless
I understand
Don't give up
Don't make me slap you
I wish there was something I could say to make you feel better, but believe it or not (and I'm sure you do) it's not easy for anyone, we all struggle from time to time, so it might seem like melting, but it's actually sometimes a slow drip!
hang in there mamma~! and please don't go away regardless
BUFFY 
I can totally see why you might not want to be at coffee group. I can't imagine what you've been through with trying to get your DS approved. Good for you posting your feelings and being so honest about it. I hope you have good news on the appeal very soon, but it's great you're feeling so at peace with whatever happens. Hope to meet you one day.
Kristy (weight loss below does not include 16lbs lost during pre WLS diet)
START: 325 Day of Surgery :309 GOAL: 180
Most Active
Recent Topics
