I pose this question to you..

I see allot these words "Perfect"  or " Imperfect"

I have thought and thought about this... to me its come across as a who's better.

I pose this question....  if it angers anyone I apologize its  just my thoughts and I am allowed like anyone else.

 "Should one approach this as trying to do it perfectly everyday knowing ya might not get there but you have that standard.. or give yourself permission to know you wont be."

I only ask this because I sincerely want to know what peoples thoughts are.  My approach to this surgery has been not veering off for fear of gaining or not losing it all and feeling again like a failure. Those are MY fears.
So I set myself up everyday to do it perfectly and at the end by tracking say " OK today I could have done better at this tomorrow I will work on ( something ).
I weigh four times a week so that when that number is up a pound.. it dogs my mind all day and I might make a better choice because of it.

This plan works for me... and if I shout it... enjoy it.. I'm not doing it to rub it in .... I'm doing it because that is what has kept me this weight for three years...........

Hope this makes sense and poses a question that I sincerely want to know every-ones thoughts.

Can it be discussed without causing more division?

 

The most wonderful thing about Internet is the freedom to say whatever it is you want.  And if someone doesn't like it, too bad.  They can stop reading.  Or they can comment.  Who cares.  These are words and opinions.  Not fact.  So post away is what I say.

I am certainly not a WLS poster child.  I am not perfect.  Nor have I ever wanted to be perfect.  I went into this journey for one reason.  To become healthy.  And I've succeeded.  I didn't do it to weigh 140 lbs.  I didn't do it to wear a size 4.  I didn't do it to make myself pretty.  I didn't do it for anyone but myself.  And in my mind, I have hit my goals.  Not perfectly.  But I have hit them.

Every day is a struggle for me.  I fear going back to the fat girl days.  I realize that it takes a lot of work to prevent that from happening.  I don't focus on a certain weight.  I let myself stay in a range.  Because if I focus on one particular number, then my moods will go up and down, depending on how full my bladder is.  I do my best.  And if my best isn't good enough, its myself that I have to be accountable to.  If I try and strive to be perfect, the only person I will hurt is myself.  So why would I do something that sets me up for failure?

I think this is where you were going with your question.  Its different for everyone.  And what works for me won't necessarily work for anyone else.  But you know what?  Life is short.  Enjoy life.  The more positive you can keep your mind, the better off you are.

There is my two cents.   Now I'm off to Burnsville to crash their party. 

Kelly
 
P.S.  The word perfect is a stupid word.  What is perfect?  Perfect in my eyes?  Perfect in your eyes?  Perfect in our own eyes?  I say lets ban the word from the english dictionary!

Great question!  Honestly, that's what scares me the most.  I've never been perfect at any weight loss attempt and haven't lost it.  I keep thinking - what if I don't do this perfectly, either and fail.  I think I have to get out of that mindset.  I need to be positive and know I'm going to be using a great tool that does work, with work from me.  I know I won't do everything perfectly and I'm ok with that.  As long as I do my best and keep on track, I will succeed!

Therese

IMHO....Everyone has to find what works for them.  I'm a rule follower so I've done pretty good with my plan.  In general, I'm not a perfectionist, and if I have a not so perfect day I'm ok with that hoping God gives me another day to work on it.
Again IMHO....perfect or imperfect...who's better....feels judgemental to me and I don't roll that way.

I hope I didnt offend.. I was just posing a question.

Im sorry

Absolutely no offense.  It was a good question.  I believe there are no stupid questions.  Don't be sorry!!  I love a good debate (this really wasn't one but) but only if everyone is open minded and listens to what we all have to say.  I love to hear others opinions, being a Libra I like to hear all sides.  Makes me think.

Its SO interesting to me that the word perfect angers people so much.

I dont use the term Im being perfect... Im trying to honestly work my tool perfectly to my ability.

Thats all......... but I thought it was SO interesting when I came up with it in my  mind. 
But that could be just in my mind its interesting!   LOL

You look SO good.

Hugs happy snowy day

I get what you mean.  Perfection is a good goal to have.
I'm off to Mtka coffee.....have a wonderful day!! 
Hugs back at ya

I like DEEP questions like these! Maybe it is the Libra in me too. LOL

If we all or even some of us strive to be prefect, what will be left for us after that? If everything is perfect we have no room to grow or fail. That is just MHO.

I toss out the word perfect and replace it with " I will do my best this day". That way I do not set myself up for failure. I  know I have a little bit of lead way if  I screw up. LOL

I know there are/will be days I just can't be "my best" if it is a bad food/liquid counting day, if I want just a tiny taste of that cake my SO is having at a party, it is all part of my life in moderation.

SO, that is my take on it with out rambling more LOL

Kelly/tink

I love your thought provoking posts. I know what you are saying and you are not trying to be harsh in any way, but then again, I *know* you and I know how much you care about everyone here and you care about trying to figure this all out so you can continue to be successful on your WLS journey.

I know that you keep your pre picture with you at all times. I know that you are not afraid to whip it out and show others. I know you are scared to go back to being that person. I think that's what keeps you so accountable to your plan!

For me personally, I have never been perfect and I never will be. But that is just my mentality because there is only one person in my world that is perfect and quite honestly, that is my Maker.

Being a new post op, I have a mentality that every day I will do my best (like Tink said). I have a plan for each day. If I need to nap vs. take a bite of protein, so be it. I will look forward to later in the day or tomorrow knowing I probably will not be as tired and I will get in extra protein at that point. If I slacked on my liquids, I add 6 oz. and strive to attain that goal for tomorrow. I set my goals so that they stretch me but they are not completely unattainable either. But I digress...we could have a whole discussion on how to set goals.

Each person finds what works for them. If they consider themselves perfect, awesome! If they are negative self talking and saying they are imperfect, then they IMO are only setting themselves up to fail. But, I personally don't believe in negative self-talk and I don't believe in settling for less.

Now, on a public messageboard, however, you can express your views and so can others. You may agree or disagree. In some ways, that is the beauty of a public messageboard and in other ways, it's the downfall of it. On this particular board, many have formed real life relationships/friendships and so it becomes very intense on here at times. That is where we have to understand the line between getting too personal and the public messageboard factor. Hope that makes sense.

Someone else's perfect may not be your perfect and vice versa. But at the end of the day, we are all battling obesity and we are all winning!!!