Heart Broken...

So after all of the changes that I have been enduring for the past 2 months... The worst ha**** me today.

Jeff my bestfriend and (I thought wonderful) boyfriend decides to tell me that He has been talking to another girl....

I don't think that I can handle this too.... I wish I could just run away...

All of the ups and downs that I face everyday with the WLS is already hard enough to deal with....

What do I do? I feel that everything is coming down around me and I have no where to hide...

I don't know you and I don't mean to make light of your grief and frustration, but things DO happen for a reason. Instead of letting this consume you, take a long, hard look at yourself and your life and ask what you can do to turn this around for yourself.  Empower yourself -- you're not a victim of WLS, you're on a journey to be a better you and its only natural that the journey is full of changes -- some good and some not so good, but keep your eyes on the prize.  What did you want to accomplish when you sought the surgery?  

It's always hard to face a failed relationship, particularly when you're getting the short end of it.  Maybe Jeff just doesn't realize what a treasure he has????  

I used to have a friend that said "nothing easy is everlasting."  Every day I learn a little more of what she was talking about. We couldn't reach our goals if something didn't change so the ups and downs are just part of the deal. 
Hang in there, sweetie!   

Sorry about the boyfriend situation, that sucks! 

While it feels like everything is coming down around you and you can't handle it, you can.  You made a very hard decision to better your life with WLS and you've been DEALING with all changes that has brought to you. 

You'll be ok, I'm sure it doesn't feel like it now, but it will be. 

First off...((hugs))  I'm sorry you are going through this.  I'm sure it hurts.

But I see in your eyes that you are a strong person and you will get through this.

PM me if you'd like...don't hide.

You have no reason to hide.  You have undertaken a courageous journey to change your life.  Some of the people in your life can handle that fact, some can't.  I encourage you to attend support group meetings/coffee gatherings whenever you can as you experience the most dramatic physical and emotional changes related to weight loss surgery.  Enjoy the embrace of those who have or will be on the same road as you find yourself.

Take care,

RP

Okay, this is probably going to sound VERY shallow of me, so I hope you can forgive me for that.

If I was you, I'd look REAL HARD for the silver lining in this.  Chances are, Jeff is not a perfect person.  I don't think there is such a thing.    Were there things about him that bugged you?  Or at least things that you wish were maybe a little different, perhaps even "better"?  Allow yourself to dwell on those thoughts for a bit. 

You made a decision to have this surgery to make yourself a healthier person.  The gravy is that you're also going to be a smaller person, and generally speaking, that makes you better looking to the masses.  Maybe this is YOUR time to focus on YOU - getting healthy, figuring out who you're gonna be when all that excess is gone!  And maybe, once you're closer to your goal, Karma will bring someone wonderful to you!  Stranger things have happened...

Just focus on YOU for now.  Being selfish so that you can make the most of this tool you've been given.  Who knows?  Maybe Jeff will come to his senses and want you back?  Then YOU'LL be in the driver's seat, and get to decide if you want him back!

Sorry this has happened to you. Jeff at least told you the truth. He obviously wasn't the right one for you. Don't beat yourself up over it. Just because he failed the relationship it doesn't mean you did!
Things do happen for a reason. I broke off a 4 year relationship. It almost killed me. I still do love him but it just wasn't meant to be. Leaving was the best thing I could have done for myself.
I had my surgery....I found myself. I took a year off from dating and learned alot about myself. I am stronger because of it.
I have known another man for about ten years. We were just friends. We were both recovering from bad situations. Four months ago be decided to start dating.....the time was finally right. Neither of us were looking for a relationship and WHAM...there it was right in front of us!!

Take this time for you....enjoy your weight loss journey. Find yourself. Yes...it hurts right now....you will recover and life will be good once again!!!

You aren't alone....we are all here for you. PM me anytime!

Hugs....connie d

You've received great advice so far!
Just hang in there!!!
This guy was honest and I'm sorry, but that's got to account for something these days! It hurts, but I'm a FIRM believer in everything happens for a reason even though we don't always know why at the time. It will be revealed to you eventually. Just hang in there & keep focus on your WL journey for now!

So sorry you are hurting!!!  Lots of good advice and insight so far- Best Wishes hun!  Things will get better!!!

I agree with what everyone else has said.  You are in pain right now, but give yourself some time, and you will come through.  Just because Jeff has been talking to someone else doesn't mean he has abandoned the ship.  This may be a wake up call to both of you to examine your relationship. 

Concentrate on yourself - you deserve all of your attention.