Detached from reality (long)
Elena,
When ever I see you at the coffee get togethers I often envy how confident you are and how you relate to others in conversations. You seem outgoing and a very fun person to be around. You seem to me like a beautiful social butterfly! I often wish I had skills like that . I really think you are much farther along in your emotional journey then you think. The fact you are aware of the old you coming in to your thoughts is very perceptive. Breaking the negative thoughts with postive ones is what will take hard work. I think it also takes some courage to put yourself out there in situations that maybe in the past you wouldn't be comfortable with and just practice handling your reactions to the new situations. If you can manage to find a therapist to help with this it would be benefical but I know financially it isn't always an option. I've seen this book recommended Your Body Believes Every Word You Say, Barbara Levine that is suppose to be helpful, but there are also free podcasts you can download for self-help advice.
When ever I see you at the coffee get togethers I often envy how confident you are and how you relate to others in conversations. You seem outgoing and a very fun person to be around. You seem to me like a beautiful social butterfly! I often wish I had skills like that . I really think you are much farther along in your emotional journey then you think. The fact you are aware of the old you coming in to your thoughts is very perceptive. Breaking the negative thoughts with postive ones is what will take hard work. I think it also takes some courage to put yourself out there in situations that maybe in the past you wouldn't be comfortable with and just practice handling your reactions to the new situations. If you can manage to find a therapist to help with this it would be benefical but I know financially it isn't always an option. I've seen this book recommended Your Body Believes Every Word You Say, Barbara Levine that is suppose to be helpful, but there are also free podcasts you can download for self-help advice.
Start 323 ~ Current 199 ~
Elena,
This has nothing to do with "You're young, get over it." Don't let anyone tell you that. I too am going through this.....And it's making my head spin....
Being treated like a "normal women" is making my life topsy turvy......
Yep, I know I'm thinner also.....But I still see that fat person......It's only when I see a photo of me that I see ME.......And I'm like, "That's me?"
Since your single, you can enjoy the attention....Flirt back, etc....For me being an "Old Married women," I have to just smile and walk away or explain I'm married.....
I have a wonderful hubby, and I love him so much.....But the attention has really got me in a tail spin and I've asked him for help to deal with it.....Before I was married I never had this kind of attention.....It's from college Boy's all the way up to 60+ year olds.....It's flattering, but at the same time it's messing with my head......
So just know you're NOT alone.......I'm/were here for you......
That's also why I posted a get together, maybe we all can help each other out.......
Kelly
This has nothing to do with "You're young, get over it." Don't let anyone tell you that. I too am going through this.....And it's making my head spin....
Being treated like a "normal women" is making my life topsy turvy......
Yep, I know I'm thinner also.....But I still see that fat person......It's only when I see a photo of me that I see ME.......And I'm like, "That's me?"
Since your single, you can enjoy the attention....Flirt back, etc....For me being an "Old Married women," I have to just smile and walk away or explain I'm married.....
I have a wonderful hubby, and I love him so much.....But the attention has really got me in a tail spin and I've asked him for help to deal with it.....Before I was married I never had this kind of attention.....It's from college Boy's all the way up to 60+ year olds.....It's flattering, but at the same time it's messing with my head......
So just know you're NOT alone.......I'm/were here for you......
That's also why I posted a get together, maybe we all can help each other out.......
Kelly
I think you crawled in my head and said what I feeling out loud. I hear it from other but still have the old feelings. You are not alone on this. I only reason for not running is that I am already married and don't need to worry about if they are real or not. Although if my situation was different I would be very uncomfortable. That's why I love to go out with my girlfriends for that extra safety net. Please feel free to talk to me about this anytime you are not alone.
Jennifer
(((Elena)))
I don't see this when I've been around you, but I know what you mean...I still see the fat person too, despite a 70 pound loss & clothes fitting better. People say "wow, you're getting thin" and I just want to RUN away. I have no clue how to handle those comments, as you observed - I cry.
I pray you find your peace and if you're meant to see someone to help you deal with this, then I pray you find the right person that can help you through it.
I don't see this when I've been around you, but I know what you mean...I still see the fat person too, despite a 70 pound loss & clothes fitting better. People say "wow, you're getting thin" and I just want to RUN away. I have no clue how to handle those comments, as you observed - I cry.
I pray you find your peace and if you're meant to see someone to help you deal with this, then I pray you find the right person that can help you through it.
Thank you so much for posting this! I am scared of the same thing. I don't like feeling invisible... but I guess that's all I know! I'm also kind of afraid that I could be resentful or angry towards people when I think they are treating me differently after the weight loss. Is it possible for your mind to catch up with your body?! I'm working pretty hard for this and I want to be able to enjoy it, damnit! I want to look in the mirror without thinking about fat or skinny- I just want to see me!
Hang in there!
Hang in there!
I pass on the same advice as those above my post.
Also, Look in the mirror, I mean really LOOK in the mirror, see yourself and say out loud "This is me, I deserve attention from those around me. This is who I am! I love ME!"
Or just say something like this, it is amazing what talking to yourself in the mirror does. (the neighbors may think you are nuts, thats ok let them think what they want)
hugs, lorri
Also, Look in the mirror, I mean really LOOK in the mirror, see yourself and say out loud "This is me, I deserve attention from those around me. This is who I am! I love ME!"
Or just say something like this, it is amazing what talking to yourself in the mirror does. (the neighbors may think you are nuts, thats ok let them think what they want)
hugs, lorri
Lorri
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