My concerns were confirmed...

Thanks friend

  Big hugs to you!  My pastor had a sermon two weeks ago about "Beautiful Scars"  and it made me realize then that these "scars" are a reminder of where I have been, what I have been through, and where I am going.  You are a beautiful lady!!!!  You have so much knowledge on this subject and that helps me daily just to read your posts. 

People can be so insensitive and tactless.  Don't mind her!!  Like Meredith at our local WLS center says......"those that mind don't matter and those that matter don't mind"  She doesn't matter!!

We all think you look great!  I only wish I can look half that good with my journey!

Thanks for your thoughtful and kind response... I know she doesn't matter. I think it's the fact that she focused the bright light of reality on my insecurities that got me. I know that I have 'earned' my scars. I'd rather have them than the fat and health/quality of life issues associated with it, but I'd really rather not have it at all. I'd like to look as though I never did this to myself... but then my 14 year old would rather not have a 24 in scar down her left leg and she didn't 'do' anything to cause that scar either. We all have our burdens and insecurities. SOmetimes I think I can tuck mine away and other times they fall out for all to see.

Wishing you all the best as your surgery approaches,

F*ck her.

You've known me for quite some time now.  I think you realize that I speak what's on my mind, damning all consequences.  So here goes:

You don't have a turkey neck.  You don't have a ton of wrinkles or bags under your eyes.

Yes, you aren't as plump as you were preop.  You know this -- but you don't look like some old hag waiting to die, either.

So I go back to my original sentiment:  F*ck her.


Sorry we'll be missing y'all on Saturday -- but if you still have a meetup on the 20th, we'll be there with jingle bells on!

And if you wanna see me anyway, come on out to the fairgrounds to visit me!

OMG!!! You made me LOL! Thanks for the chuckle and the friendship your response represents.

I don't know what makes people think they can say whatever they want and it has no consequences.  I would just love to haul off and slap someone like this!!!!

I had a person tell me at a support group meeting (not yours) that I should have lost more weight already.  I just sat there with my mouth hanging open, then told her I was very happy with a 60 pound loss at 5 months.  I later found out this lady had been on the OR table for her surgery and was sewn back up and sent home to reduce her liver.

You are a BEAUTIFUL lady and don't let anyone take that feeling from you.
I have sags and bags and I have not reached my goal yet.  I am trying to hide as much as I can with turtle necks, spandex, playtex, and any other X I can buy.  Thinking of plastics for my sagging belly in the future, but that will be as far as I go.  I will tuck my boobs in my waistband and cram my flappy thighs in some good undies and hide my residual chin skin and neck skin in scarves and turtle necks during the winter.  But, come summertime,  it will just have to flap in the breeze!!!

((((HUGS)))) sent your way - now wash that woman right out of your hair and go shopping.  It will make you feel better!!!!

Brenda

Brenda,

You are a sweetheart and I appreciate your sentiments and where they come from. 

I think that the issue wasn't that she was so rude ... she was, but it was that it brought to the forefront my own insecurities that I'm having to grapple with. I probably will never be able to afford plastics, but I imagine if I do, it would be my face and neck that I would have done first because I can't 'X' it in spandex, playtex and whatever other type of X we can think of. 

Thanks again,

I am so sorry you had such a insensitive person say horrible things like that to you.
Many times when people say such things yes it tends to put us in a state of shock.
Be proud of where you have come from Barb.
If you do have a few winkles and or scars leftover from being obese wear them with pride you have earned them.
You have fought a battle and have won the battle.
Yes you will always have to keep certain thoughts and or old behaviors in check
You have always been a beutiful woman so as Andrea said F*CK that person.
She has not travelled your road and she may not go as far as you.
                                                                  Annie

Hi Annie,

THanks for the support. I truly do appreciate it. I probably will never be like you and happy to wear my scars with pride, but I am trying to come to terms with it all. I think it's not that I care so much about what SHE thinks. I think that what she said was a reflection and validation of what I think and that what I really didn't like.

 

 

What a bunch of pains - the tactless critter nees a lobotomy not WLS - cause we all kow you just can't fix stupid.
- Iris