still here

I haven't posted in a while so I will write an update. I'm pre-op and suppose to be dieting so I can start losing weight but I'm having a very difficult time. I started to do the marching in place thing, but then got discouraged and stopped. I'm not sure what got me discouraged. Then I started a project.. I built a new computer desk. That has kept me busy for a week and half. I guess even that is exercise. I haven't been writing what I'm eating and exercising in my journal. I really need to get back to doing that. Sometimes I feel so down on myself that I think this is all a mistake, but then I realize I will never lose if I don't go through with it. I haven't had counseling for about a month. My counselor was diagnosed with cancer and had to have surgery, so he hasn't been available. The good news is that they got every bit of cancer out, so now he is cancer free! So that is good news, was kinda scared there for a while. HOpefully counseling will start back in early June. Another thing is when I'm out with friends shopping or something, they may want to go out to eat and that is a very weak spot for me. I'm not sure what to order. I'm not much of a salad eater, besides what they put in salads is sometimes just as ri*****alories as in a sandwich. I don't know. I'll have to start doing the salad thing more , with light dressing. I went from drinking regular soda to diet soda, but I'm not getting much water in, so I could work on that also. The whole thing seems to be a matter of motivation, but then when ya try to put it into practice it turns into much more then just getting motivated to do the right things. In a way, this surgery is a commitment to dealing with the emotions another way besides what we've always done. And that is a huge task. I guess I'm afraid of failure. Anyways, thanks for listening to my ramblings. Take care... debby

Debby, Hello hun ~Hugs~ Thanks for the update! I am glad to hear that your counselor is doing well. I know this struggle is hard and once you can get back to counseling it might be better for you, keep positive! I know what you mean when you go out to eat but now most places will make things the way you want, I sometimes get: *Grilled Chicken Ceasar salad (i know you do not like salad but you might want to give this one a try, i use the reg dressing as i do not eat that much fat anyways so some is needed) *Grilled Chicken with Melted Muzz, side order of veggies *Any meats without all the stuffing and sauces work good. Also before the food comes you can drink water to help with the full feeling, now that I am almost 1 year out I do that slightly so I do not overeat. I hope that this helps some and keep moving forward hun, you are SOOO worth this effort to get this thing done so you can get moving into your new, healthier life! Debra P

Debby, I was not much of a salad eater either because like you said, what you put in it makes it just almost or just as bad as other foods. I really like the Asian salad from McD's because of the different things in it. We went to the mall yesterday and I ordered that. I forgot how many calories it is, but I do remember the number wasn't that bad. I looked it up before! Kristine

Debby: Glad to 'see' you post. HONEY you hit the NAIL ON THE HEAD when you realized this is about a whole lifestyle shift and a commitment to finding out how to SOOTHE self w/o food. WOW you 'GET IT!" That is the first step in DOING IT as well! I like this motivation saying when I get thinking about letting 'the fear of failure hold me back': I am not discouraged, because every wrong attempt discarded is another step forward. So remember Defeat is simply a signal to press onward, Energy and persistence conquer all things. THINK PERSERVERANCE & CONSISTENCY TODAY! IF you think you are a success you will be! HUGS! Take Care, Jamie Lap RNY 10/9/02 Dr. Singh 320/163 5'9'' (lost 45# before surgery) Plastics 6/9/04 & 11/11/2005 Dr. King http://www.obesityhelp.com/morbidobesity/members/profile.php?N=c1132518510 "Being happy doesn't mean everything's perfect, it just means you've decided to see beyond the imperfections!"