I guess that I'm lucky?????

I never get the foamies, Never barf, I can eat almost anything--and rarely feel anything when I do eat, but full. I seem to tolerate sugar pretty well , and I don't get sick from eating ice cream , cookies or chocolate....sometimes I wonder if I ever had surgery. I rarely eat more than on spoonful or one cookie or candy --but I can eat them. I know that I did have the surgery(RNY), because I have lost 79.4 pounds in less than 8 months, and have gone from a plus size twenty to a size ten pants, but it scares the heck out of me because I am deathly afraid that I will stretch my stomach pouch, and gain all the weight back. I am terrified that I am one of those who Never have any complications --one of those who fail. I guess I'm lucky that the worse thing that I ever go through is a bout of the runs once a week or so. BUT It also scares me that everything has gone so well --I don't ever want to go back to the fat , physically sick person I was. I don't want to be sick--but I don't want to fail either--I have a friend who has failed and it scares me -- Anybody else out there like me--and if so--how do you handle it??? Be Blessed Marian S.C. 242.4/163/goal 125-130???

Marian, Please don't make a good thing become a bad thing! Maybe it's a combination of good fortune and taking super good care of yourself. Don't scare yourself with things that are not meant to be for you. It's like saying, "the world is full of war, hunger, poverty, and illness, and I'm just waiting for all that terrible stuff to happen to me!" Liklihood is, it won't....That's just a blessing, not a curse! Continue to "be blessed." Hugs, Amy

Hi Amy, Please don't get me wrong--I Know how lucky it is NOT to have serious dumping problems--but sometimes it can be a tiny bit daunting--to know that a cookie won't make me sick--Believe me, I NEVER eat more than one and then only once a month or so. I tend to go for high protein drinks and meats as my favorites. I just need to vent sometimes--When I put things in writing , I often solve my own dilemma. I continue to exercise and stick to the high protein diet--but truthfully--I really don't have ANY complications. I do thank the good Lord that I don't--but sometimes I have to remind myself to be VERY careful to follow the recommendations of my Nutritionist--I go over my rules of the pouch at the beginning of every month. I guess that after sixty years of food addiction --it is difficult to lose the old mindset. I don't want sweets like I use to and I don't seem to ever finish a plate of food--no matter how little I put on the plate--so I guess it's working! I am blessed and I know it! (you know something that I just realized--I was kind of bragging that ,I am, in fact, Blessed --I don't have Complications--Praise the Lord! ) Thanks for you message--I have had a breakthrough revelation ! You have a Blessed Sunday! You are absolutely right ! HUGS right back at you, MarianS.C. 242.4/163/goal125-130???

Marian S.C.: Hi, MANY MANY people NEVER get the foamies, (Like I said I had it ONCE when a calcium pill got stuck like 2 weeks out of surgery!); I can eat just about anything w/o vomiting, never did that; only when my adhesions 4wk out of RNY caused a stricture. I haven't touched sugar in the raw form (cake/candies/cookies/ice-cream etc) I fear dumping but not 1/2 as much as I fear NOT DUMPING. Many people NEVER DUMP! It is not a guarantee (RNY and dumping), some dump early on, and not later as the body adapts, some always dump...I THINK THEY ARE THE LUCKY ONES! BUT who will we each be no one knows. SO my philosophy is DON'T find out! Now dumping is also a quantity thing, CONCENTRATED SWEETS/FATS can initiate dumping... one Oreo may not do it 3 could. So a bite is usually ok for anyone...Again farther our one is less chance of dumping usually. According to: pg 308 of "Obesity Surgery" by Louis F. Marin ISBN 0-07-140640-9 Dumping occurs in about 50% of postoperative primary bariatric surgery patients who have operations that exclude the pylorus from the food limb of malabsorbtion this means RNY it further reads CONTRARY to earlier belief presence/absence of dumping has NOT been found to correlate with long term wt loss results. It also reads it is important to adjust behavior and stop behaviors that cause dumping because the GI system begins to TOLERATE higher sugar solutions w/o the dumping as it ADJUSTS! And that this ADJUSTMENT can decrease wt loss. Now, I say STAY FEARFUL of regain, stay VIGILLANT and true to the LIFESTYLE changes (dietary/exercise/psychological) needed to maintain the wt loss. Use it as a motivator not a sabotager....Most anyone loses wt w/ wls, not everyone will maintain that loss. Studies point to the people who CHANGE their psychological ties w/ food and reframe food as fuel eating to live vs. living to eat as most successful, as the people who adopt support and exercise into their routine. WLS is a great tool to lose wt but it is up to us after 6, 12, 18 mo or so to KEEP IT OFF! For me FAILURE I SAY is not an option. I know I have to make healthy/wise food choices 90% of the time, that for me I have to exercise 10 hrs a week/6 of that is cardio, to maintain at 3.5 yrs out, drink my water, avoid caffeine, alcohol, carbonation, sugar and eating/drinking together. I know I have to eat protein first do my 2 shakes a day, take my vits/minerals and follow up w/ labs/dexascans/nutrition MD for life regularly...I have to take care of me! And that is okay. I have had to make many changes to deal w/ my food issues/demons & I know I have changed my relationship w/ food, I can now throw it away w/o dread, I can leave 1/2 or more on my plate w/o guilt, I feel it is only a waste if it is on my waist. I no longer subscribe to the staving children/people in (insert place here) club or the clean your plate club. I no longer feel deprived instead I feel in control, I realize I have CHOICES, ones I may not always like but that all choices have consequences. For me being healthy and thin feels better than any momentary food gratification. I can soothe myself with friends, exercise, writing, online support, music. I can delay cravings and not go crazy. Do I do all that perfectly? Heck no, but I look at progress not perfection in my life, I look to challenges no more difficulties. How we talk to ourselves really matters in how we feel and act. At 1 yr out I had lost all my wt (most in first 7 mo), took me 5 mo to lose the last 15#! I fell into the I can eat bread, sugar free cookies, sugar free ice cfream crap fantasy..Nope I reagained 10# soon after 1 yr out! YIKES what a wake up call. I made many changes adopting the south beach philosophy I think it is perfect w/ shakes for wlsers! Do I eat bread, yes just not each day or even week, Do I eat pizza? Yup maybe 1-2 x month. When the scale is up I go back to lean meats/veggies, I detox off the nasty carbs that make me hungry. I guess for me it is learning about myself. This maintenance is a B_TCH sometimes it is new, I have been a successful loser 100# 3x in my lfe, I never learned how to maintain or the EFFORT it takes! WOW it is a shocker! But its worth it and I am doing it and I know we all can! MANY people see wls as the answer to wt loss and not requiring any effort on their part, sadly those who believe in the magic bullet/pill of wls may find it difficult to maintain the wt loss. Those who did not educate themselves to just how much work it is FOREVER to lose/maintain, those who get lulled into the safety of the honeymoon and do not work on change in lifestyle are the ones struggling from my experience. If I had a nickel for every time I heard I wish I had started to go to therapy, exercise, eat healthier in the beginning...If I only realized this wasn't magic, that this is harder than any 'diet' I have done, If I had only realized how I needed to change my mind/spirit to be successful. It is not to say one cannot change after the honeymoon is over but it sure is more challenging! YOU CAN be successful, it is up to you, and the choices you make will dictate your success! You are in control of that! Believe in yourself ok! HUGS WLS is the jumpstart we need, but that is all it is....I was angry and sad about this for a while, but I learned to accept it for what it is and do what I needed to BE SELF RESPONSIBLE for my body and actions and that is liberating! I have more self-esteem than ever and that helps me maintain w/in 10# of my lowest for this long, where will I be in 5 yrs? IF I keep on keeping on where I am today! I know that! (JAMIE STEPS OFF her soapbox now!) I just bought a great book (one I could of written) you may want to get it! The Emotional First + Aid Kit--A Practical Guide to Life After Bariatric Surgery Price: $24.95 (plus $5.00 shipping and handling) Author: Cynthia L. Alexander, PsyD Synopsis: This book's purpose is to help all those wishing to change their lives through bariatric/gastric bypass surgery. As a psychologist, Dr. Alexander has seen hundreds of people both before and after surgery and has witnessed firsthand their problems and trials, as well as their successes. In this book, Dr. Alexander discusses many of the difficulties a bariatric patient is likely to encounter and some realistic and practical strategies for dealing with them. Most people go into bariatric surgery full of motivation and hope, only to find day-to-day postoperative existence more stressful than they imagined. Here are the psychological tricks of the trade to help make your own journey a successful one. About the Author: Cynthia L. Alexander, PsyD, is a psychologist with the Cleveland Clinic Florida, Weston, Florida, and Adjunct Professor, Nova Southeastern University, in Ft. Lauderdale, Florida. She also works for the 17th Circuit Court of Florida. http://www.bariatrictimes.com/obesity-medical-books.cfm Take Care, Jamie Lap RNY 10/9/02 Dr. Singh 320/163 5'9'' (lost 45# before surgery) Plastics 6/9/04 & 11/11/2005 Dr. King http://www.obesityhelp.com/morbidobesity/members/profile.php?N=c1132518510 "Being happy doesn't mean everything's perfect, it just means you've decided to see beyond the imperfections!"

Hi Catlady Believe me I don't take anything for granted --and I voice my concerns as a way of verbalizing those issues that could become a problem. I am NOT under the mistaken impression that the surgery was a "magic Bullet" or a "cureall " for my eating addiction. I see a behavioral psychologist twice a week and I exercise at the pool four times a week(in fact I teach a water aerobics class at th local Y.M.C.A.). As for overeating --or eating the wrong things--I think that we all are guilty at one time or another. I don't beat myself up about it but I did want to know if others had the same concerns as me. I often write my concerns as a way of recognizing where I am with myself. I realize that I am extremely lucky to have had a complication free surgery --especially after reading all the posts from people who have had strictures and revisions (I won't even go into the problems Tavia has had). I thank God that my surgeon (the most wonderful Dr. Malholtra) and his team at Long Island Jewish Center for Weight Loss are such an excelent group. I attend my support group meetings and I believe that I am doing everything that I need to do to continue on my journey to good health. I do intend to succeed --that is why I continue to read these messageboards and keep myself in touch --everyday --with my emotions , my physical concerns and spiritual concerns. Truthfully --I wanted to know if others had concerns like mine. Thanks for your input. MarianS.C. 242.4/163/goal125-130???

Marian, Hun I know exactly how you are feeling. ~Hugs~ and as Jamie said if we use that to help keep us on track it will a good thing. I know the thought of regaining all this weight is so scary and is on my mind all the time but it is when I forget what it was to be so heavy then I lost the battle. I want to remember every day how much my life has changed for the better and use that to motivate me more. Does not always work but moving forward is the goal. We just have to believe we are on the right road now, take the time to pay attention to US! Worry about doing what is right in the hear and now, letting go of what "could" happen and take each day as it come. Doing out best is all we can do each and every day! ~Hugs~ I am not sure if that helps any and I am glad that talking about all of this helps you, i know it sure helps me.... I wish you all the best!!! Debra P

Hi Debra, I am so relieved to see that oterer have the same concern--I don't want to fail--that's why I come to the boards every day --to remind myself of my goal Be Blessed, Marian S.C.

Generally speaking, one of the of the worse things you can do is compare yourself to others...especially to someone like myself to whom .03% have my ongoing functional complication and to whom only one surgeon in the New York area has seen besides in me.