Knocking On The Broom Closet Door....

Hi! I just found this message board and, even though it looks like the door is dusty from lack of use, I'm hoping there are some people who will start chatting here. I am on my state message board...Alabama....yikes! Of all the places for a pagan to be! It appears that virtually everyone is big time christian on the board. I have gotten a lot of support from them in a lot of ways, but it bothers me all the praying that is going on for everyone. They are, of course, entitled to their path, but I know that I would not be entitled to mine, were they to know what my path is. I don't have pagan on my profile because this is, after all, Alabama. I lived in Tampa FL for several years and enjoyed being a part of a large pagan community down there. It was wonderful. My health forced me to move back to my hometown in May and I have just been dying inside for a lot of reasons. I lost my health, my job, my home, my friends down there, my life of freedom to be who I am. I have a consultation with a surgeon on the 17th for this surgery, but I don't know if the insurance will approve it or not. Everyone on my Alabama board has been praying for everyone and talking about how God is so good and wonderful and no matter what post I post, they tell me to pray and God will take care of me. I was reading a profile of a lady on the Alabama board who had surgery at the same place where I have a consultation and as she was going into surgery, she was overjoyed that the nurse asked her if she was saved and prayed with her. Ok, I need this surgery so badly that they can do whatever they want, but I am going to be SO uncomfortable if a nurse asks me if I'm saved and prays with me. Since I am FROM Alabama, I know that my saying I'm not a christian and no thank you on the prayers will not be the end of it. She will still tell me she's going to pray for me and will look shocked, etc. I remember being in the broom closet for years before moving to Florida and I hate having to go back in the broom closet again. But it is SURVIVAL here. You can get killed for being anything other than christian in this area. I would actually be SCARED to tell the medical personnel that I was a witch. Anyway, I chanced upon this message board and am hoping to meet new people who can give me encouragement without telling me they are going to pray for me. Again, it is their right to worship as they choose and I respect that, but I do not want to have to tell some nurse whether I am saved or not. I've heard a lot of people talk about liking a doctor or not because he will pray with the patient before surgery. I think that should be the patient's decision whether christian prayers are forced on them. Anyway, I LOVE my friends on the Alabama board, but I do not wish to be inundated with prayers. And I hope no one on the Bama Board finds this post or I will be an outcast for sure. So thought I would say hello here and hope someone will peek in and say hi. There are a lot of pagans in this world and I am on other email lists so I'm not just totally isolated as I was before Florida (thank the Goddess for the internet!) but it would be nice to see some like minds HERE! Thanks for listening! Love, Joni

Greetings Joni, I've been in your shoes before. I've had so many people say they are praying for me. I just say thank you for their kind words and move on. I don't understand way people just assume you want christian prayers. There are so many other paths out there. I live in Maine and everyone around my area knows I am an ordained Reverend of Wicca. I am excepted by most every one there. How ever right now I am visiting friends in Arkansas. Things are quite differant here in the Bible belt. Those that know me love me, but those that have heard some how that I am a witch do not speak to me. Nor will they look me in the face. Its so sad the stories most christians have been told about Wiccans. I wonder just what it is they think will happen if they look into my eyes? LOL, silly people. Magickal moon beams to you. BB, Barbara

Merry Meet! I totally understand. But I can say this, I refused prayer from a lady pastor that my mother brought to the hospital when I had surgery. I was quite surprized that she was very nice about it and said (with a smile) ok, well can I check on you later? Strange thing about prayer, we as pagans pray to Goddess/God and I think this taught me to be more tolerant of the good xians, yes there are a few good ones, just as there are some not so nice pagans. I live here in Richmond, VA and my parents are pentecostal ministers. Pushy people, my parents, and they can't believe that I am an ordained witch, but my mom is warming to the idea. Anyway, prayer is still a good thing if it is meant in respect and general caring for the individual. And of course that we give permission. (although, I wonder what the xiams motives are most of the time) but I totally understand what you mean about them always wanting to pray to their god about us. Seems like they think we need converting. LOL I don't think it will ever change. I just try really hard to be respectful/tolerant of their belief, mainly because I expect the same, and will settle for no less. I am glad to see we have a board here, it shows you that at least we can have a voice here. A tiny voice can make a loud noise when there are lots of them. I wish you well on your new journey, keep us posted. Love & Light Keep your head high enough that you can still look over the ignorance, intolerence and injustice all around you.

I know just how you feel, Joni. I was filling out a hospital form a few days ago and under "Religion" I put NON-CHRISTIAN in capital letters. Hopefully they will see that and know better than to send a minister or priest in to pray over me. I've asked my husband to watch out for that too, while I'm incapacitated. We have Wiccan/Druid clergy in our area who will be notified when I have my surgery in case they are needed. Morganna in Indiana

' Gagg. I put pagan on mine, and in addition, I told them No Clergy. So who was knocking on my door in the hospital when all I wanted was to sleep? They just won't take no for an answer, and they mostly won't be very nice about it either. And so many are so ignorant about the bringing in of the greens and holly, the grand Yule fires, etc., and tell me I shouldn't be doing these things if I'm not christian. I suppose many mean well, but then, so did Torquemada. I'm not particularly even pagan, just a respecter of Mother Nature. I respected the heck out of Her for many years before I decided to do an end run and have this surgery. Sort of like a catholic getting a divorce? .

The first surgical seminar I went to, there was a woman sitting in the row in front of me and my mom. She started in telling us how much she loved her surgeon, and how she just KNEW she'd chosen the right man to do her surgery because the very FIRST thing he did when he had his consult with her was to take her and her husband's hands and pray with them, then went on to talk about the risks of WLS and how everyting was "in God's hands". Both my mom and I had to chew our tongues off not to respond with something like "I just could NOT have major surgery done on me by a man who tells me it's 'in God's hands' whether I live or die." I know exactly what you're saying about Alabama being a place where it just doesn't do to say out loud you're NOT a Christian.

. I agree. Saying "it's in god's hands" sounds like he's covering his rear well ahead of time. I lived in AL for several years, and the religious climate drove me nuts. Although I must say - I had very good friends who were very religious, but they were cool and just lived their religion, didn't try to force it on me. The only thing they did was decide it was time for me to have a baby, though I wasn't on board with the idea. My friend and her mom said they'd pray for me to get pregnant, and darned if it didn't seem to work. My little presbyterian prayer is now 18. lol .

**knock Knock** (standing on the other side of Joni's door) Glad you could find the courage to at least crack that door open Hun! Merry Meet! I left a message on your surgical support page like an idiot... I should have posted it here....lol... So here it is: I just wanted to leave you a quick message to let you know that you are not alone in all of this "approval nightmare." I have military health care and I have been waiting over a year from my procedure so I know how waiting and commuting and everything can really drain you! I hope that your surgeon or doctor can convince your insurance to make an acception for you after a few months of "good faith effort" to abide by their presurgical diet. Especially since you have some fairly serious complications and comorbids. I will light a candle for you! ANYWAYS ---> )o( By his hoof & his horn may the piece of the Lord forever be in your heart and by the earth that is her body, by the air that is her breath, by the water that is her blood and by the fire of her bright spirit, may the piece of the Lady reside in your heart! Brightest Blessings~ Jamie M.