Dear Stress, you can go away anytime now!
Life is weird. I say that a lot nowadays. Between marriage and kids and health and friendships and, and, and...it gets to be a bit much some days. Or a lot of days. Or every day. You know what I hate? Probably not, so I'll tel you. I hate the ups and downs. I can handle the ups. I can handle the downs. But the flux of the ups and downs really screws with my psyche. I guess it is probably because I am one of those people that puts 110% into things (depression and anxiety included!) and it is tough to go from the highs of things going well to the bottom-of-the-abyss lows. My mind says, "Whoa, what the hell was that? You were happy 18 minutes ago! Knock that crap off!"
I'm interested in how you handle your super-high stress times. I don't mean my kid got a B instead of an A kind of stress. I'm talking divorce, moving, serious illness, financial problems kind of stress (just examples--not all personal experience for those that might worry). Do you retreat? Do you exercise? Do you drink? Do you post 87 times a day on OH (hmmm, that doesn't sound like me at all!)? Do you do yoga?
I'm hoping someone will share something they do that will help ease the sting of life.
Thanks guys!!
Denise
I'm interested in how you handle your super-high stress times. I don't mean my kid got a B instead of an A kind of stress. I'm talking divorce, moving, serious illness, financial problems kind of stress (just examples--not all personal experience for those that might worry). Do you retreat? Do you exercise? Do you drink? Do you post 87 times a day on OH (hmmm, that doesn't sound like me at all!)? Do you do yoga?
I'm hoping someone will share something they do that will help ease the sting of life.
Thanks guys!!
Denise
Check out my blog--menumealplanning.com. Tales of making meal planning managable, family fodder, and everything else under the sun.
RNY 2/3/09, LBL/BL w/Augmentation 9/16/11
Start weight: 335 Current weight: 185 Goal weight: Whatever the hell I can maintain without driving myself insane!
*6.5 lost preop
I find somebody I can vent to. During a recent time of lots and lots of stress, I was venting here on OH because I did not have anyone else I could talk to. I was really glad to have OH and I got so much wonderful support.
I write. Journal. A lot. I don't journal much when life is going food but when things are bad, I write like crazy.
I go to therapy. Which I do even when things are good, I go almost every week, but it's really good to have that relationship there when things are bad.
I used to eat ice cream. Lots and lots of ice cream. I don't do that anymore.
I write. Journal. A lot. I don't journal much when life is going food but when things are bad, I write like crazy.
I go to therapy. Which I do even when things are good, I go almost every week, but it's really good to have that relationship there when things are bad.
I used to eat ice cream. Lots and lots of ice cream. I don't do that anymore.
Kelly
Please note: I AM NOT A DOCTOR. If you want medical advice, talk to your doctor. Whatever I post, there is probably some surgeon or other health care provider somewhere that disagrees with me. If you want to know what your surgeon thinks, then ask him or her. Check out my blog.
I do vent a lot. Frankly, I get tired of hearing myself talk, so I KNOW those I'm talking to must tire of it! I am also going to counseling every week. Sometimes that just feels like a 100.00 hour-long ***** fest though, although he is very good and makes me dig.
Journaling is something I've never done with any consistency. I've been asked to do so by my counselor. Guess I should start doing like you spoke of and at least do it during tough times, although I often feel so overwhelmed during those times, it would probably feel overwhelming to think of doing it.
OH is a great resource for sure. Wish we all lived closer!!
Thanks!
Journaling is something I've never done with any consistency. I've been asked to do so by my counselor. Guess I should start doing like you spoke of and at least do it during tough times, although I often feel so overwhelmed during those times, it would probably feel overwhelming to think of doing it.
OH is a great resource for sure. Wish we all lived closer!!
Thanks!
Check out my blog--menumealplanning.com. Tales of making meal planning managable, family fodder, and everything else under the sun.
RNY 2/3/09, LBL/BL w/Augmentation 9/16/11
Start weight: 335 Current weight: 185 Goal weight: Whatever the hell I can maintain without driving myself insane!
*6.5 lost preop
She's from 339 to 200 as of 6/14/2012.. SOO proud of my bigbabygirl 
I am exactly like you when it come to stress. 110% or go home. To be honest with you I don’t know what to do with “super stress" at times myself. Some days I just sit in the floor and cry. Yesterday was one of those days. I got some very disappointing news financial, emotional, and a big let down all rapped up in one ) and just felt lost afterwards. I didn’t get in the pool, I didn’t want to go anywhere, I didn’t want food, I didn’t…. I finally got up and went to the gym. I did a Zumba class and weight training afterwards. I walked into Smoothie King and got my protein shake. By the time I got in the car, I felt so much better. I even got in the pool when I got home.
The super stres****s at the worst times possible. Sometimes I work out hard, sometimes I just need time to sit in cry. I feel that there is not one “right" answer to handle “super stress". I have to listen to my body to tell me what to do and sometimes its okay to do nothing….I do want to hear what other think about this subject too….
The super stres****s at the worst times possible. Sometimes I work out hard, sometimes I just need time to sit in cry. I feel that there is not one “right" answer to handle “super stress". I have to listen to my body to tell me what to do and sometimes its okay to do nothing….I do want to hear what other think about this subject too….
The gym is a HUGE help. Of course forcing myself to get there when I want to lie down and go to sleep for 3 hours in the middle of the day is another story altogether! But it ALWAYS makes me feel better. It empowers me. It is true that just like how often we weigh ourselves, there is no "right" way to do stress reduction. It is so individual. Today is one of those days that I do feel like doing nothing, but the mess in the house strongly disagrees, so cleaning it is. I need to be clutter-free in the house when my mind is cluttered, so it is a good thing I guess.
I'm off to find the horizontal surfaces in the house!! Thanks for your feedback!
I'm off to find the horizontal surfaces in the house!! Thanks for your feedback!
Check out my blog--menumealplanning.com. Tales of making meal planning managable, family fodder, and everything else under the sun.
RNY 2/3/09, LBL/BL w/Augmentation 9/16/11
Start weight: 335 Current weight: 185 Goal weight: Whatever the hell I can maintain without driving myself insane!
*6.5 lost preop
I cry, vent, and the anxiety drives be batty. I didn't have anxiety until about 2 years ago and had no idea what was going on. I totally shut down shaking and couldn't breathe.
I have good days and not so good days. Yesterday was BAD and I can't even put my finger on it as to why I felt so overwhelmed.
I feel like there is a weight on my shoulder and it can't be lifted some days. I'm a worry-wart and getting things ready for school for my boys, wondering how I'll manage work, helping with homework and/or studying, after school activities, them being home alone after school til I get there (they are 10 and almost 12 and I don't believe mature enough to be alone, even for 1:30) and/or figuring out how financially I can hire someone to stay with them for a short time in the afternoons had me cracking yesterday.
I've been told to journal also, I haven't and I can't say why other than being scared to put it to paper of how I'm feeling at.that.moment. It seems to just add something else to my already super-duper busy life as a single mom.
I wish I had the answer, Denise.
I keeping telling myself it'll get better and I'm learning and growing spiritually, physically and emotionally.
I have good days and not so good days. Yesterday was BAD and I can't even put my finger on it as to why I felt so overwhelmed.
I feel like there is a weight on my shoulder and it can't be lifted some days. I'm a worry-wart and getting things ready for school for my boys, wondering how I'll manage work, helping with homework and/or studying, after school activities, them being home alone after school til I get there (they are 10 and almost 12 and I don't believe mature enough to be alone, even for 1:30) and/or figuring out how financially I can hire someone to stay with them for a short time in the afternoons had me cracking yesterday.
I've been told to journal also, I haven't and I can't say why other than being scared to put it to paper of how I'm feeling at.that.moment. It seems to just add something else to my already super-duper busy life as a single mom.
I wish I had the answer, Denise.
I keeping telling myself it'll get better and I'm learning and growing spiritually, physically and emotionally.
Proximal RNY Lap - 02/21/05
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My thoughts exactly on the journaling adding to an already busy life. I guess there is always something I could give up to make time (OH? Nah!), but that is just more juggling I don't feel like doing right now.
I'm sorry you are struggling too. I guess the only thing I can say is that we can't do it all. It is that simple. I try to remember that if I have to give up something the kids want or "need" in regards to activities, that avails me time and patience to parent more effectively otherwise. I mean if we step back and look at our lives, they are busy and stressful even if they are going well. Add drama and man it gets tough. I don't want to be a single mom, but sadly it seems my life is going to be heading that direction. It is a lot to process and to hear you speak of single mothering reminds me that it is going to be tough. But there is tough and there is crazy. Right now I'm living with crazy. I'd much rather live with tough. Crazy is HARD! Hey, we could get a house together! You work, I'll cook, clean and handle the kid stuff!! Can I still get an occasional pedicure? :) Laugh or cry--my new motto!
You are so right though. What's the saying--what doesn't kill us makes us stronger? We should some strong chicks by now!!! LOL!!
Always good to hear from you. Hang in there!
Denise
I'm sorry you are struggling too. I guess the only thing I can say is that we can't do it all. It is that simple. I try to remember that if I have to give up something the kids want or "need" in regards to activities, that avails me time and patience to parent more effectively otherwise. I mean if we step back and look at our lives, they are busy and stressful even if they are going well. Add drama and man it gets tough. I don't want to be a single mom, but sadly it seems my life is going to be heading that direction. It is a lot to process and to hear you speak of single mothering reminds me that it is going to be tough. But there is tough and there is crazy. Right now I'm living with crazy. I'd much rather live with tough. Crazy is HARD! Hey, we could get a house together! You work, I'll cook, clean and handle the kid stuff!! Can I still get an occasional pedicure? :) Laugh or cry--my new motto!
You are so right though. What's the saying--what doesn't kill us makes us stronger? We should some strong chicks by now!!! LOL!!
Always good to hear from you. Hang in there!
Denise
Check out my blog--menumealplanning.com. Tales of making meal planning managable, family fodder, and everything else under the sun.
RNY 2/3/09, LBL/BL w/Augmentation 9/16/11
Start weight: 335 Current weight: 185 Goal weight: Whatever the hell I can maintain without driving myself insane!
*6.5 lost preop
I vent to friends. I have a group of forum friends I've known for 12 years and I can say anything there. I write a lot. I find that if I sort through things in my head and get them all out (verbal or written) that it diminishes some of the anger/feelings.
I'd like to say I exercise when I am angry but I haven't been able to channel bad feelings in that way yet.
I try to find the source of the fluctuations and see if there is anything practical I can do about it. Like, if I am stressed out, is it because I procrastinated? Because I am not prepared? Because I haven't been doing things I should? If I can immediately correct that, I do, and it has a positive effect, I remind myself of that the next time it comes around.
If its something I have zero control over...that is harder...on Tuesday I was majorly stressed so I took off work an early early, took my girls to the pool, and I sat on my rear in the sun for four hours, until the pool closed.
I'd like to say I exercise when I am angry but I haven't been able to channel bad feelings in that way yet.
I try to find the source of the fluctuations and see if there is anything practical I can do about it. Like, if I am stressed out, is it because I procrastinated? Because I am not prepared? Because I haven't been doing things I should? If I can immediately correct that, I do, and it has a positive effect, I remind myself of that the next time it comes around.
If its something I have zero control over...that is harder...on Tuesday I was majorly stressed so I took off work an early early, took my girls to the pool, and I sat on my rear in the sun for four hours, until the pool closed.
WOW!! After reading all these posts I thought I'd have an anxiety attack...lol. It was like reading my life story over and over again...but several years ago when things got too much for me to handle...the ups and downs, the worrying...etc...I broke down to my doctor. I'm soooo glad I did that now. We talked about it and he put me on an anti depressant and my life has changed so much I can't even explain it. Its so wonderful now compared to what it was back then. I was so afraid to tell anyone...afraid they'd think I was nuts... but he explained that its a brain thing. I was able to live happily through the rest of my sons deployment (big source of stress) and ever since.
Its truly been a blessing for me (and my family)
Tammie
Its truly been a blessing for me (and my family)
Tammie
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