Finally broke down.....WARNING-rambling included. LOL
I fianlly broke down and let the DH take some before pics of me yesterday. We had to go to his neice's wedding and I looked really nice so I said that was the best time to get the before pics. Yep I was NOT happy. I cringed and asked, "What the hell have I done to me?" Short answer is, I have no friggin idea. I just know that even though I was smiling and was happy for the day I was not and still am not happy with how I look and feel right now. DH is the best thing that has ever happened to me and I told him that I was scared. Scared of him leaving me when all this is done. He told me I was crazy for thinking that. He said that no matter what- fat or skinny, crazy or braindead he would still love me for me.
On a bright note, the wedding was wonderful. She was absolutely gorgeous. Her and her now husband are the perfect pair. They compliment one another so well. She is loud and boystrous and he is quiet and laidback. The two families compliment one another as well. Hers is laid back and quiet (unlike her!!!) and his is loud and out there (while he is the laid back one.) My DH's dad passed away year before last and her dad who is also a preacher made sure that he was remembered during the wedding service. I blubbered like a crazy woman. My DH's children are older than I am (YES I married an older man, but love him to peices) and his son played the bagpipes. I cried because even though his children are not mine, they are some of my good friends (was NOT like that at first). There was alot of talk about my upcoming surgery, yes the word got out- dunno who blabbed. But overall the talk was positive. Lots of questions, lots of fears and misconceptions laid to rest. I also made it clear that I was NOT to be the topic of conversation because it was not my day, it was Grace's. She approached me and told me that she was proud I was doing for me for once. They have seen how I push myself to the back burner on almost everything. She also told me she is gunna kick my butt if I do not get back on the ball with getting my bachelors degree. This family is a family of teachers and educators. I never really knew how most of them thought of me and felt about me until yesterday. I find it amazing how things fall into place.
Although my mother in law is against WLS of ANY kind, she did tell me that it is MY decision and that I had to do what I felt was right for me. WOW- never thought that would happen.
The food decisions over the past few days have been interesting to say the least. Firday there was a pig pickin aka BBQ and I had to eat, I had not eaten all day but I think I did ok. Got two small pieces of the lightest meat off the porker and some chicken which i peeled the skin and fat from (yes it was fried but it was a drumstick, which I didnt eat the whole thing-gave most of it to one of the younger kids who kept eyeballing ti because it was the last drumstick there). Had 1/2 cup of the coleslaw and some beans. Yesterday was brunch and of course the wedding reception. I had some sausage and egg with cheese scrambles, coffee, and some fruit. At the reception I had half a chicken marsala thigh, half a slice of roast beef, fruit, and some baked mac and cheese. I feelt full. I dunno if it is because over the past several months I have been cutting portions like crazy but I was full at half the plate.
Today is gunna bring up more issues because we had to leave early last night because DH had to work. They are having leftovers for lunch and I have already said I am NOT eating much because I feel BLAH today- dunno if it was the food itself or if it is the overall lack of sleep.
We will see......
Ok realized I have rambled ALOT on this post.
Advice for those pre-ops who are dreading taking a before picture, just do it. It doesn't hurt and the only thing it costs is a smile, oh and maybe a muscle cramp from the inevitable cringe of WTF am I doing.........
On a bright note, the wedding was wonderful. She was absolutely gorgeous. Her and her now husband are the perfect pair. They compliment one another so well. She is loud and boystrous and he is quiet and laidback. The two families compliment one another as well. Hers is laid back and quiet (unlike her!!!) and his is loud and out there (while he is the laid back one.) My DH's dad passed away year before last and her dad who is also a preacher made sure that he was remembered during the wedding service. I blubbered like a crazy woman. My DH's children are older than I am (YES I married an older man, but love him to peices) and his son played the bagpipes. I cried because even though his children are not mine, they are some of my good friends (was NOT like that at first). There was alot of talk about my upcoming surgery, yes the word got out- dunno who blabbed. But overall the talk was positive. Lots of questions, lots of fears and misconceptions laid to rest. I also made it clear that I was NOT to be the topic of conversation because it was not my day, it was Grace's. She approached me and told me that she was proud I was doing for me for once. They have seen how I push myself to the back burner on almost everything. She also told me she is gunna kick my butt if I do not get back on the ball with getting my bachelors degree. This family is a family of teachers and educators. I never really knew how most of them thought of me and felt about me until yesterday. I find it amazing how things fall into place.
Although my mother in law is against WLS of ANY kind, she did tell me that it is MY decision and that I had to do what I felt was right for me. WOW- never thought that would happen.
The food decisions over the past few days have been interesting to say the least. Firday there was a pig pickin aka BBQ and I had to eat, I had not eaten all day but I think I did ok. Got two small pieces of the lightest meat off the porker and some chicken which i peeled the skin and fat from (yes it was fried but it was a drumstick, which I didnt eat the whole thing-gave most of it to one of the younger kids who kept eyeballing ti because it was the last drumstick there). Had 1/2 cup of the coleslaw and some beans. Yesterday was brunch and of course the wedding reception. I had some sausage and egg with cheese scrambles, coffee, and some fruit. At the reception I had half a chicken marsala thigh, half a slice of roast beef, fruit, and some baked mac and cheese. I feelt full. I dunno if it is because over the past several months I have been cutting portions like crazy but I was full at half the plate.
Today is gunna bring up more issues because we had to leave early last night because DH had to work. They are having leftovers for lunch and I have already said I am NOT eating much because I feel BLAH today- dunno if it was the food itself or if it is the overall lack of sleep.
We will see......
Ok realized I have rambled ALOT on this post.
Advice for those pre-ops who are dreading taking a before picture, just do it. It doesn't hurt and the only thing it costs is a smile, oh and maybe a muscle cramp from the inevitable cringe of WTF am I doing.........
As a single person we make but a whisper, as a crowd we make a roar. A friend.
"I never claimed to be an expert at such matters, but I am an expert at giving my opinion."- My dad
I am going to break down and have my husband take some pics of me too, uh just not sure when. Knowing me, the day before surgery! I just had to reply to this, because you said PIG PICKIN' OMG I am an NC girl and know exactly what your talking about...!! That brought up a whole new issue for me that I had not thought about yet. My husband is in the Army and we are stationed in KY so I am not with my family, but we do visit and good ole' southern foods!! WTF! I will have to really restrain myself when I am home, fresh seafood, pig pickin's, Sunday dinners complete with fried chicken, fresh corn, and a table for just for all the cakes and pies, brownies, cookies, etc! Ah, Aunt Carol's sweet tea..so sweet it almost makes your teeth hurt..lol AH! but WE are all stronger than they temptations so we'll be just fine :)
I actually kind of look forward to my "before" pic. I need the reminder of where I came from so I don't take the same path back again. Will it make me sad? Yeah , and probably angry too. But I know what the fat girl was hiding, and I know now she doesn't have to hide anymore. I'm ready to put a "during" pic up too! (guess I should have the surgery first lol )
You'll do great!
You'll do great!
Sounds like a beautiful wedding!
I just peeked at your photos..you looked very nice.
I sooo understand about being hesitant to take the before pictures. To be honest, I hate to have ANY picture taken of me anymore. I always cringe at the mere THOUGHT of having my photo snapped. I look at the photos and think "Is that REALLY what I look like??"
We went to visit my 25 year old son last week and took some photos, we were standing, so I will use one of them for my before. I think I will wait until my surgery and there is some improvement before I post them!
I just peeked at your photos..you looked very nice.
I sooo understand about being hesitant to take the before pictures. To be honest, I hate to have ANY picture taken of me anymore. I always cringe at the mere THOUGHT of having my photo snapped. I look at the photos and think "Is that REALLY what I look like??"
We went to visit my 25 year old son last week and took some photos, we were standing, so I will use one of them for my before. I think I will wait until my surgery and there is some improvement before I post them!
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