When I look at my before pics I feel...fill in the blank!

I think I feel a sense of disconnect. It's interesting to see my old pics, but I've let go of the shame, anger, embarrassment, etc. A lot of my excess weight was gained when my dad was dying. It was the only way I could cope. I've forgiven myself for that period in my life. Plus, I know everything I went through in my past, including being overweight, shaped who I am today, and I think i am pretty wonderful. Also, if I had been thinner all those years, I may have found someone I wanted to marry and then I would not have my wonderful daughters, whom i adopted. They are my life and I would not go back and magically make myself thin any sooner than I did.

Things happen for a reason. I hope everyone learns to forgive themselves and can embrace how your overweight selves helped shape who you are today. I think it's a big reason why maintenance has been a breeze for me.

Laura

Yall know Im the oddball here LOL..
I feel gorgeous, voluptuous, envious, sad due to the fact that Im no longer at that size, sexy, full of life.

I have mixed emotions when I think about how I might feel. At my highest weight of 360,.. I had some "OMG  what is going on with my weight" moments,..but for the most part up until then I still felt attractive and oh so alluring as a big woman. I realized I was extremely unhealthy and was not able to live the life I wanted to live at 360.  I didn't want to take before pictures because of the negative connotations that seems to be associated with them but I did because this is my journey. I do I realize I am only 2.5 months out and my emotions will change,...however I do hope I do not get to the point where I feel disgust when looking at my before pics,... time will tell,.. we are on a different journey and I'm very much interested to see where mine will take me emotionally.

Disconnected.

Frankly, I don't know who that girl was. I cannot relate to her and as time goes on I cannot remember (on a sensory level) what it was like to be her. I have memories of the way I thought when I was obese and how I related to the world, but inside my skin I am so not that person anymore and everything about that girl seems foreign to me.

But I don't get sad or anything like that. I don't regret who I was then. I don't regret who I was at any stage of life. All that I was makes me all that I am now. It's a part in the process that is my life. And since I don't regret my life, I cannot regret her.

But yeah...I can't identify with her anymore and find myself with reducing patience with other people who think the way she thinks. Thankfully I know how to keep my mouth shut.