i thought i had this all figured out

Anyone else *think* they were prepared for having this surgery and the lifestyle changes, only to start second guessing themselves pre-op?  I was so prepared for this and now all of a sudden I'm getting cold feet.  Oh, and cold feet isn't an option.

The counselor asked so many tough questions yesterday about how I'll be post-op, and I just can't predict how I'm going to react.  I can think I'm going to be fine w/ the changes, but what if I'm not?  I don't have a crystal ball.

I'm so discouraged right now and overhwhelmed with this entire process.  It would bring me some comfort to know I'm not alone, that others have felt this way.

What were the questions that you had a hard time with?

I think it's very common for people to question themselves and have doubts sometimes.  You are looking at making a huge change in your life.  I don't think it would make sense to take that lightly or not question it.

Questions like,

what are you going to do if you stall or fall off wagon
what are you going to do to stay motivated
what are you going to do if you start having mental health issues again
are you going to return to your old eating patterns


these were just some of the questions.

my husband is asking the same questions and while I think i have answers, they certainly don't seem good enough to him.  I can't say that anything 100%.  That i won't return to old eating patterns.  i'd like to think i will be making these changes for good, but who can predict the future?

he is so afraid of me failing, and it's really discouraging me.

Those are good questions.  See if these help.

Stalling and falling off the wagon are two different things.  Stalls are normal, they happen, you don't need to do anything except stick to your plan.  But falling off the wagon is different because it means you need to change your behavior.

What things have motivated you in the past (not just to lose weight, but to do anything challenging)?

Surgery doesn't cure or prevent mental health issues.  What would you do if you had mental health issues again before you have surgery?

What eating patterns would you like to develop?

It's overwhelming and what you're feeling is normal. We all go through it, The bottom line is do you want to make the changes to lose the weight - no matter what you have to do? It's not as hard as it seems when you read all the posts. You get into a habit of what you can and should eat for breakfast, when to take your supplements and how much water you need per day to not get dehydrated. The up side is you can lose the excess weight you carry around now. You can have a life filled with physical activity, less health problems and more self esteem. You can shop for smaller size clothes, run around with your kids and realize how fun life is when our weight doesn't hold us back. You will be able to take in stride each new challenge you run into as a post op. When you find a food you don't like or it doesn't agree with you , take it off your list, try something else and move on. It's good that you're thinking about what changes you'll have to make, what the counselor said and how you'll react. Many don't go into this with their eyes wide open and end up with problems later on down the road. For me it's the best decision I've ever made. I'd do it over again every single year in order to feel this good. My recouperation time  was minimal, pain was minimal, adjusting to the rules and guidelines post op pretty easy and I've had no complications or problems. Aside from some dehydration early out, but that was an easy fix. I have enjoyed amazing energy, tons of self esteem, met many friends who are also post op and I have no health issues. My weight is stable and about where I want it to be. It's an amazing journey and I wouldn't have missed it for the world.

Jen 10 yrs post op RNY