Surgery Date March 6th
Okay, so my backstory is this . . .
Was always like 140-160 in my 20's but got sick with an autoimmune illness in 2000 - Sarcoidosis. When my mother died 8 months later, it mutated into Necrotizing Sarcoidal Granulomatosis (lungs). Went on 100 mgs of prednisone for 3-4 years and shot up to 350lbs at 5'3". Finally got off prednisone and was in remission and started Jenny Craig. Lost 150lbs and down to 200lbs. Went of JC and then gradually over the next year or two got back up to 260lbs. Decided on the Lapband in Dec 2007. Over a 4 year period, I lost 80lbs and got down to 180lbs. Not the success I had imagined. Throw in the having to sit upright because of acid getting aspirated into my lungs and constant 5 hr trips for fills and loosening and it wasn't really worth it. Finally in March 2011, I got Gallbladder disease and had had enough with the band, so I told them to take out the band when they took out my Gallbladder. I wasn't really considering another WLS, I thought I could keep it off.
Once the band came off, it was like I was a convict in jail for years and I was making up for lost time. Within about 3 months I rebounded back to 233lbs. At that point, I went on the HCG diet and dropped to 210lbs in 3 weeks. Massive mood swings and hot temper due to Phenteramine app suppressant, so stopped it. Then an FDA audit of my business began (I'm in Pharmaceutical Research) in September and I knew I was in trouble. So, I joined JC again, by this time at 222lbs. JC saved me from gaining a single pound during the 4 month audit, but I didn't lose either.
In January 2012, I decided to go hardcore with my weight loss. I resolved not to let this defeat me another year. I had a good friend of mine, deep into nutrition and exercise start to tutor me. Since then I've been gaining and losing 10lbs every week. I realized in early February that this wasn't going to work and it was my last option. Then I said, OK! Big girl panties now! Gastric Bypass!
So, that's where I am now. I had my first surgical consult last Friday and set my surgery date for March 6th 2012. I wanted it quicker so I wouldn't have to think about what I was doing, but that was the quickest I could get, due to 2 week liquid fast. So, this weekend I became some crazed, obsessive nut *****ad through 100 pages of RNY posts here. By Sunday night, I was totally freaked. Do I really want to know the bad going into this? Well, it's too late now, I know it. And I'm still resolved this morning to do it. Last night . . . not so much.
So, I got up at 4am this morning when I'm most inspired and wrote myself two letters for after the surgery. One for immediately afterwards, one for the months - 2yrs afterwards. I wanted to remind myself why I was doing this and why there is no other option. I wanted to caution myself against things that would make my recovery worse and remind myself that there is an end in sight, to just hold on. I really can't think of anything else to do.
So, my big worries . . . .
I'm a pretty highly strung, passionate, moody, quick tempered individual. But, I'm also warm, funny, and sensitive to others' feelings as well. I don't want to burn any bridges during my recovery - however long that may last. I have read about the hormones in the stored fat that get released and cause mood swings and this scares the HECK outta me! I'm moody without the released hormones. What is in store for me with a flood of hormones? I am unbearable to be around at work when it's that time of the month. What the HECK kinda disasters am I going to create at work over the next 2 years while these hormones overwhelm me? Other moody people's insights into the experience would be very helpful at this point.
Second thing is after the desolation and devastation of the FDA audit our research business was practically shut down. We couldn't do anything or bring in any money for 4 months and sponsors are wary of us even though we came out smelling like roses, with perhaps a little maneure in the fertilizer! :) LOL But that's okay. Since January of this year I have really cranked up the volume on our work and have brought in contracts that will garner for the business around $50k over the next 4-5 months.
That's just the beginning though. It requires constant vigilence and not slacking up for even a moment. I've got two great girls - one is now fully trained and can work - mostly - unsupervised. The other is brand new but is great at QA work, which is a staple in research. I can afford to remote monitor for a couple of weeks and not bring in any new contracts for a couple weeks as long as I return to hustle mode when I get back.
Do I really want to jeopardize what I have just gotten going again with possible set-backs? If I wait a few months, we will have more studies and they will be new and require tons . . . TONS of work that I absolutely cannot be away from because no one is trained to start a new study. So, it's now or never. But it may be the last study we do. There is a time limit as to when we have to meet quota - September - 16 patients enrolled. Last year we only enrolled 3 all year. This year so far we've enrolled 5. Still need another 8 patients and if we meet our quota before September we get more. I'm hoping the work pressures, which really drive me and fullfill me will be enough to get my mind off whatever I'm going through as a result of the bypass and make the time go by faster. Other people with this kind of situation going into the bypass could really help ease my mind about how mentally active and sharp and focused I will be in the months to come after surgery.
I have a great husband and great employees at work. They really are my family. My family I grew up with know nothing about this as they are incredibly negative, doomsayers, that never seem to want anything good to happen to anyone else. The last thing I need is their baggage. So, zipped lips with them. My husband is hiring someone to move in with us for a month to try to help me. I can be unbearable at stressful times to live with because I'm slightly OCD and deal with stress by wanting to keep to a very rigid routine. My husband has a joke about this. I'm not OCD but CDO (because it's alphabetical as it should be!). LOL
I'm also a 2 pack a day smoker, drink 3 glasses of wine 3x's a week (large glasses) and am required to attend business dinners 3 nights a week with other doctors and I don't get a choice as to where we go - Italian restaurant loaded with carbs and sugar. And the wine and food is how I keep myself charming and outgoing at these meetings. I can have maybe 2 meetings off (they occur Mon Wed Fri and my surgery is on a Tuesday), then I have to resume. How nauseous will I be 6 days after surgery and what should I plan as my emergency plan if I do get nauseous and how long will it last? I'm thinking go sit in the bathroom, regardless of what people think. Or perhaps go sit in the car. My husband will be in attendance as well and can make excuses that we've had a patient emergency or something. But he can't do these dinners on his own as I am the only one *****ally knows the business and can solidify the contracts.
So, help me brainstorm, please! I truly believe that with enough pre-planning - and what else will I be doing during the 3 week wait for surgery - that I can pretty much avert a lot of disaster from this surgery. You're probably asking what is my priority . . . biz or getting healthy (ie weight loss). BOTH! I don't want to sacrifice either of these things. Is it possible?
Whew! Okay. So that's what's going on and I feel better by getting it out. I'm not really worried about the surgical complications because I went through and Open Lung Biopsy when they told me I had metastatic lung cancer (and I didn't have it). I did fine with that, so how much worse can an RNY be? I've also been through a gallbladder removal and a band insertion and removal. I know those last two aren't that serious, but they didn't flare my AI up, so that's a good indicator, right?
Okay, I'm babbling at this point. But very much looking for any advice, ideas, comments, suggestions, etc.
Was always like 140-160 in my 20's but got sick with an autoimmune illness in 2000 - Sarcoidosis. When my mother died 8 months later, it mutated into Necrotizing Sarcoidal Granulomatosis (lungs). Went on 100 mgs of prednisone for 3-4 years and shot up to 350lbs at 5'3". Finally got off prednisone and was in remission and started Jenny Craig. Lost 150lbs and down to 200lbs. Went of JC and then gradually over the next year or two got back up to 260lbs. Decided on the Lapband in Dec 2007. Over a 4 year period, I lost 80lbs and got down to 180lbs. Not the success I had imagined. Throw in the having to sit upright because of acid getting aspirated into my lungs and constant 5 hr trips for fills and loosening and it wasn't really worth it. Finally in March 2011, I got Gallbladder disease and had had enough with the band, so I told them to take out the band when they took out my Gallbladder. I wasn't really considering another WLS, I thought I could keep it off.
Once the band came off, it was like I was a convict in jail for years and I was making up for lost time. Within about 3 months I rebounded back to 233lbs. At that point, I went on the HCG diet and dropped to 210lbs in 3 weeks. Massive mood swings and hot temper due to Phenteramine app suppressant, so stopped it. Then an FDA audit of my business began (I'm in Pharmaceutical Research) in September and I knew I was in trouble. So, I joined JC again, by this time at 222lbs. JC saved me from gaining a single pound during the 4 month audit, but I didn't lose either.
In January 2012, I decided to go hardcore with my weight loss. I resolved not to let this defeat me another year. I had a good friend of mine, deep into nutrition and exercise start to tutor me. Since then I've been gaining and losing 10lbs every week. I realized in early February that this wasn't going to work and it was my last option. Then I said, OK! Big girl panties now! Gastric Bypass!
So, that's where I am now. I had my first surgical consult last Friday and set my surgery date for March 6th 2012. I wanted it quicker so I wouldn't have to think about what I was doing, but that was the quickest I could get, due to 2 week liquid fast. So, this weekend I became some crazed, obsessive nut *****ad through 100 pages of RNY posts here. By Sunday night, I was totally freaked. Do I really want to know the bad going into this? Well, it's too late now, I know it. And I'm still resolved this morning to do it. Last night . . . not so much.
So, I got up at 4am this morning when I'm most inspired and wrote myself two letters for after the surgery. One for immediately afterwards, one for the months - 2yrs afterwards. I wanted to remind myself why I was doing this and why there is no other option. I wanted to caution myself against things that would make my recovery worse and remind myself that there is an end in sight, to just hold on. I really can't think of anything else to do.
So, my big worries . . . .
I'm a pretty highly strung, passionate, moody, quick tempered individual. But, I'm also warm, funny, and sensitive to others' feelings as well. I don't want to burn any bridges during my recovery - however long that may last. I have read about the hormones in the stored fat that get released and cause mood swings and this scares the HECK outta me! I'm moody without the released hormones. What is in store for me with a flood of hormones? I am unbearable to be around at work when it's that time of the month. What the HECK kinda disasters am I going to create at work over the next 2 years while these hormones overwhelm me? Other moody people's insights into the experience would be very helpful at this point.
Second thing is after the desolation and devastation of the FDA audit our research business was practically shut down. We couldn't do anything or bring in any money for 4 months and sponsors are wary of us even though we came out smelling like roses, with perhaps a little maneure in the fertilizer! :) LOL But that's okay. Since January of this year I have really cranked up the volume on our work and have brought in contracts that will garner for the business around $50k over the next 4-5 months.
That's just the beginning though. It requires constant vigilence and not slacking up for even a moment. I've got two great girls - one is now fully trained and can work - mostly - unsupervised. The other is brand new but is great at QA work, which is a staple in research. I can afford to remote monitor for a couple of weeks and not bring in any new contracts for a couple weeks as long as I return to hustle mode when I get back.
Do I really want to jeopardize what I have just gotten going again with possible set-backs? If I wait a few months, we will have more studies and they will be new and require tons . . . TONS of work that I absolutely cannot be away from because no one is trained to start a new study. So, it's now or never. But it may be the last study we do. There is a time limit as to when we have to meet quota - September - 16 patients enrolled. Last year we only enrolled 3 all year. This year so far we've enrolled 5. Still need another 8 patients and if we meet our quota before September we get more. I'm hoping the work pressures, which really drive me and fullfill me will be enough to get my mind off whatever I'm going through as a result of the bypass and make the time go by faster. Other people with this kind of situation going into the bypass could really help ease my mind about how mentally active and sharp and focused I will be in the months to come after surgery.
I have a great husband and great employees at work. They really are my family. My family I grew up with know nothing about this as they are incredibly negative, doomsayers, that never seem to want anything good to happen to anyone else. The last thing I need is their baggage. So, zipped lips with them. My husband is hiring someone to move in with us for a month to try to help me. I can be unbearable at stressful times to live with because I'm slightly OCD and deal with stress by wanting to keep to a very rigid routine. My husband has a joke about this. I'm not OCD but CDO (because it's alphabetical as it should be!). LOL
I'm also a 2 pack a day smoker, drink 3 glasses of wine 3x's a week (large glasses) and am required to attend business dinners 3 nights a week with other doctors and I don't get a choice as to where we go - Italian restaurant loaded with carbs and sugar. And the wine and food is how I keep myself charming and outgoing at these meetings. I can have maybe 2 meetings off (they occur Mon Wed Fri and my surgery is on a Tuesday), then I have to resume. How nauseous will I be 6 days after surgery and what should I plan as my emergency plan if I do get nauseous and how long will it last? I'm thinking go sit in the bathroom, regardless of what people think. Or perhaps go sit in the car. My husband will be in attendance as well and can make excuses that we've had a patient emergency or something. But he can't do these dinners on his own as I am the only one *****ally knows the business and can solidify the contracts.
So, help me brainstorm, please! I truly believe that with enough pre-planning - and what else will I be doing during the 3 week wait for surgery - that I can pretty much avert a lot of disaster from this surgery. You're probably asking what is my priority . . . biz or getting healthy (ie weight loss). BOTH! I don't want to sacrifice either of these things. Is it possible?
Whew! Okay. So that's what's going on and I feel better by getting it out. I'm not really worried about the surgical complications because I went through and Open Lung Biopsy when they told me I had metastatic lung cancer (and I didn't have it). I did fine with that, so how much worse can an RNY be? I've also been through a gallbladder removal and a band insertion and removal. I know those last two aren't that serious, but they didn't flare my AI up, so that's a good indicator, right?
Okay, I'm babbling at this point. But very much looking for any advice, ideas, comments, suggestions, etc.
Doctors often require patients to quit smoking up to six weeks before surgery, so now is the time to start quitting!
OK, the crazy hormonal stuff usually only lasts a short time. It's during the time weight loss is most rapid, so the first few months, not two years. Also in the beginning, you're still recovering from the anesthesia, and getting used to not being able to turn to food to deal with stress, and all that stuff. Try to remind yourself during that time that the hormones are wacky and it's not a good idea to make any major decisions, get in any big arguments, etc during that time. Save those things for a couple months until the hormones have evened out. You can also let people you're close to know you may be a bit moody for a little while. It reminds me a lot of how women can be right after having a baby.
You may not feel nauseous at all when you go to your first business meeting after surgery. If you are feeling nauseous, take some anti-nausea meds (make sure your doc prescribes some). Make sure you stick to your post op diet even at these meetings. So in the beginning that may mean taking along a protein shake and having that instead of ordering anything. If your clients ask you about it, say "Oh, I had stomach surgery recently, everything's fine but I'm not supposed to eat solid food just yet," and then change the subject. If you get too nauseous, going out to the car would probably be a good idea. Some fresh air might help.
OK, the crazy hormonal stuff usually only lasts a short time. It's during the time weight loss is most rapid, so the first few months, not two years. Also in the beginning, you're still recovering from the anesthesia, and getting used to not being able to turn to food to deal with stress, and all that stuff. Try to remind yourself during that time that the hormones are wacky and it's not a good idea to make any major decisions, get in any big arguments, etc during that time. Save those things for a couple months until the hormones have evened out. You can also let people you're close to know you may be a bit moody for a little while. It reminds me a lot of how women can be right after having a baby.
You may not feel nauseous at all when you go to your first business meeting after surgery. If you are feeling nauseous, take some anti-nausea meds (make sure your doc prescribes some). Make sure you stick to your post op diet even at these meetings. So in the beginning that may mean taking along a protein shake and having that instead of ordering anything. If your clients ask you about it, say "Oh, I had stomach surgery recently, everything's fine but I'm not supposed to eat solid food just yet," and then change the subject. If you get too nauseous, going out to the car would probably be a good idea. Some fresh air might help.
Kelly
Please note: I AM NOT A DOCTOR. If you want medical advice, talk to your doctor. Whatever I post, there is probably some surgeon or other health care provider somewhere that disagrees with me. If you want to know what your surgeon thinks, then ask him or her. Check out my blog.
I don't have any words of wisdom about the medical questions you have. I'm going in for surgery on Friday. I may know more after that.
However, I am an attorney with my own law firm, so I might have some idea of what it's like to prepare for a major surgery when you are trying to support a business. I started preparing for my absence last month by advising the Courts I practice before that I would not be available the last two weeks in February. Honestly, I can see needing an extra couple weeks off, but I intend to try to work at least part time after the first two weeks.
Then, I worked on trying to trying to plan my time out by working ahead on a few matters. My biggest pre-op challenge has been that last week, as I reached the end of weaning off caffeine and starting my pre-op diet, I was feeling awful, so a few extra things got pushed off to this week, including an appeal brief. (Appeal briefs are second only to trial preparation in stressful, time sensitive matters). I'm feeling much better today, and I anticipate that I will be able to complete my work this week.
Last Thursday, I drafted an email to my clients about my upcoming surgery, and I made contingency plans for my absence. Today, we are sending that email out. We scheduled our surgery to correspond with a court holiday, and the office will only be closed for four business days spread over two weeks. We should be okay.
To prepare for the surgery, I preordered my vitamins and unflavored protein powders. I ordered some samples of protein shakes for the full liquid portion of the diet. To mentally prepare, I read books about weight loss surgery and decided to list my commitments to myself. Before I obtained my date, I contacted my prescribing psychiatrist, and made adjustments to my medicine regime. Today, I'm making an appointment for hynotherapy on Wednesday to promote healing and control cravings.
All that being said, my preparations have not been completely without some problems. The pre-op diet and diet coke withdrawal was pretty brutal. I was anticipating having an extra week or two to complete that appellate brief I spoke of earlier. And I just received news that my niece is in the final stages of her battle with Batten's Disease and could go anytime. My step-children are quite worried about this surgery, since they just saw their mother go through surgery.
But, I'm doing this so that I can live longer and stronger, so that I can serve my family and my clients better, and so that managing all the balls in the air will not be quite so miserable to me.
However, I am an attorney with my own law firm, so I might have some idea of what it's like to prepare for a major surgery when you are trying to support a business. I started preparing for my absence last month by advising the Courts I practice before that I would not be available the last two weeks in February. Honestly, I can see needing an extra couple weeks off, but I intend to try to work at least part time after the first two weeks.
Then, I worked on trying to trying to plan my time out by working ahead on a few matters. My biggest pre-op challenge has been that last week, as I reached the end of weaning off caffeine and starting my pre-op diet, I was feeling awful, so a few extra things got pushed off to this week, including an appeal brief. (Appeal briefs are second only to trial preparation in stressful, time sensitive matters). I'm feeling much better today, and I anticipate that I will be able to complete my work this week.
Last Thursday, I drafted an email to my clients about my upcoming surgery, and I made contingency plans for my absence. Today, we are sending that email out. We scheduled our surgery to correspond with a court holiday, and the office will only be closed for four business days spread over two weeks. We should be okay.
To prepare for the surgery, I preordered my vitamins and unflavored protein powders. I ordered some samples of protein shakes for the full liquid portion of the diet. To mentally prepare, I read books about weight loss surgery and decided to list my commitments to myself. Before I obtained my date, I contacted my prescribing psychiatrist, and made adjustments to my medicine regime. Today, I'm making an appointment for hynotherapy on Wednesday to promote healing and control cravings.
All that being said, my preparations have not been completely without some problems. The pre-op diet and diet coke withdrawal was pretty brutal. I was anticipating having an extra week or two to complete that appellate brief I spoke of earlier. And I just received news that my niece is in the final stages of her battle with Batten's Disease and could go anytime. My step-children are quite worried about this surgery, since they just saw their mother go through surgery.
But, I'm doing this so that I can live longer and stronger, so that I can serve my family and my clients better, and so that managing all the balls in the air will not be quite so miserable to me.
Thanks so much for replying. So you are kinda flying by the seat of your pants too. Kinda just hoping that all the prior planning addresses any possible disasters that could happen. I'm a worry wort and I feel like if I worry enough and imagine every possible bad thing that could happen I'll be better prepared.
by the way, my surgery date was moved up to Feb. 28th. So . . . . more nervous, about planning. I feel like I'm running out of time but it can't be postponed, so . . . well, taking what comes at this point.
Good luck with your surgery. Let me know how you did. I will be looking to see how things are going with you.
by the way, my surgery date was moved up to Feb. 28th. So . . . . more nervous, about planning. I feel like I'm running out of time but it can't be postponed, so . . . well, taking what comes at this point.
Good luck with your surgery. Let me know how you did. I will be looking to see how things are going with you.
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