Post RNY & Alcoholism HELP

I am really struggling with alcohol 1 year post op.  Despite all the issues I read and warnings I thought I could handle drinking. I never had issues before surgery.  Now I realize that I have a problem.  I am not part of a support group, but would love to find one in the Raleigh area that can also support me and help me with my drinking.  My husband and I are Harley bikers and enjoy going to events and such with our fellow bikers.  so much of that lifestyle (which I love) is around a bar enviroment. It is so hard to be in a social situation where everyone is drinking and not drink.  Any advice, but especially any one know of a support group that would be great!! I actually am in the Cary / Morrisville area so closer to home the better.

Thanks

 Drinking post RNY especially while you're still losing weight is NOT good for your liver. Your liver is working overtime while losing weight, so to tax the liver more with drinking is probably not a good idea. Plus of course drinking is loads of empty calories. Some RNYers replace eating with drinking. Is this what you want? Most of us had RNY to become healthier. And of course it's difficult (but not impossible) to hang out with drinkers when you're not drinking, but you can do it. It's fun to watch the drunks.

I write this even though I'll have two glasses of wine two times/week. I have to stop at two or I get crazy drunk. And I was a bartender for 14 years. So most of my friends are drunks. I had to find some new friends. They're not as fun as the drunks, but I'm not either. 

Figure out what you want with your life and then chase it.


Good luck.

http://www.aa-carolina.org/aa_nc_city-county.html


This is what I found online.  Please find help and treatment.  This is what killed my aunt after her surgery.  You can find help even if its talking to a preacher.  Praying for you.

Kelly,

I live in the Raleigh area and am having my RNY a week from Thursday with Dr. Bruce (who's also with the same practice your surgeon is in). I'm a recovering alcoholic (for several years now) and the BEST place I have found is a wonderful group in Cary. It's an AA meeting and Friday nights they have New Commers meeting. They are warm, welcoming and great fun and there's tons of people there so you will make SO many friends.  Here's the AA schedule for our area...the place that I love the most is in Cary and it's called the Triangle Alano Club.  The beginners meeting I was referring to is Friday night at 6:00...you'll love it and it will help you SO much.  Step 0 is acknowledging you have a problem and that can be the hardest so I'm so glad you reached out. Hang in there and good luck.
http://www.raleighaa.com/intergroup/current_schedule.pdf

Lisa

What about having a Non-alcoholic beer?  My cousin's husband drank alot for awhile and then switched to those, he likes O'Douls... I think that is the name of it....  She had the RNY about 5 yrs ago, so they both got healthy in their own way !  GOOD LUCK !!

I'm sorry, I don't have much to offer by way of advice, but would like to give you a verbal (written) hug and some applause for looking for help!  I am about six months sober and just had my surgery last week so I know that this is something I need to be aware of and appreciate you being a good example!  

Always keep your goals in mind.  You are stronger than you think!

 I think support groups are good but if you struggle with alcohol I'd suggest two things. 

1. AA - you can meet other's that have the same problem.
2. Counseling. There is a reason that you feel you "cant" not drink. It would probably benefit you to talk to someone. 

With that being said sometimes you have to change your lifestyle to suit your new lifestyle. ;)

Kudos to you for reaching out for help!

I concur on the counseling.  The reason many of us transfer our addiction to something else, is becase, well, we have an addiction.  Take away the food without dealing with the true cause of the emotional issues, and many people will end up drinking, gambling, whatever.  I was completely in denial about my food addiction - "I just love food, and I eat too much" - until after I had surgery.  Once I had to actually face my problems insteaqd of medicating them with food, I had an epiphany.

And if you are not ready to stop drinking altogether because you hate to lose those good times with your friends, here is a poem that I picked up from a friend who is a recovering alcoholic:

There Is a Hole in My Sidewalk
Autobiography in Five Short Chapters
By Portia Nelson

Chapter One
I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I fall in.
I am lost…I am helpless.
It isn’t my fault.
It takes forever to find a way out.

Chapter Two
I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend that I don’t see it.
I fall in again.
I can’t believe I am in this same place.
But, it isn’t my fault.
It still takes a long time to get out.

Chapter Three
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep whole in the sidewalk.
I see it is there.
I still fall in…it’s a habit…but,
My eyes are open
I know where I am
It is my fault.
I get out immediately,

Chapter Four
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.

Chapter Five
I walk down another street.

I hope things get better for you. 

AA is your best bet. And there are a lot of bikers who don't drink, drink diet coke at the bars or abstain all together. Get a water bottle and carry it with you on rides, and drink nothing else. It's hard to do but noticing the problem is half the battle. Check with your doc, local support group or other friends who have had the surgery for recommendations. I am also a Harley Biker, my closest friends ride, we do Sturgis yearly and they haven't had a drink in over 25 yrs. The AA chapter sets up their tent city in Sturgis near where I stay so bikers have a sober choice for socialization when they ride. Many events are dry and drinking discouraged. If you had a compulsive personality (most post op did with food) then you are a candidate for a compulsion for something after. When food isn't there we turn to other things to satisfy the cravings - some go for shopping, others gamble, drinking is a biggie but there are other outlets for a compulsive personality. Find what your triggers are, stay away from them and find a good group with a sponsor you can report to and get back on track. Good luck - you've probably helped a lot of people today with your post.
Jen 10+ yrs post op RNY

If you drink daily and experience physical withdrawal symptoms when you try not drinking, you may need detox treatment.

If you realize you have this problem I would recommend that you stop drinking all together.

Hope things are better for you soon.