Now THIS is stupid!

So as you all know and have experienced as wls patients, we get constipation.  Sometimes really bad, don't we, Shelia B?  Anyway...  I've been "c" and thought, drastic times call for drastic measures...  I told Tim, "tonight at Longhorn I am going to make myself sick.  I have to make myself use the bathroom.... I am going to drink, eat, and have dessert.  That should make me GO."  Over the next few hours, I drank two margaritas.  THAT made me forget the pain I had from constipation, for sure!  And then, I ate lettuce in my salad (usually I say I want a salad, but hold the lettuce, please)...  that would help speed things along, thanks to no gallbladder....  then I had a portion of Tim's ultimate brownie, with ice cream. With fudge topping.  Surely that would make it happen! OH YES!  HALLELUJAH!  Oh yes I did go...  I made him step on the gas pedal to get me home in time! What I had failed to factor in to this equation is:  the way my body reacts to carbs.  So I come out of the restroom in my bathrobe...  yawning, sleepy, get on the sofa with the huge furry blanket...  and go to sleep.  This is at 8 pm. I wake up about 30 minutes or so later...  like a madwoman, tearing off my robe...  pacing the house in the nude..  yelling at Tim saying "That picture made me sick!" I have no recollection of saying these things, but he says he asked, "What pictures?  How did they make you sick?"  (I had downloaded some pics off the internet previously... Maybe thats why the pics were on my mind?)  I do remember shaking all over, a low blood sugar episode.  I kept yelling for him to give me some food RIGHT NOW!  Give me food.  He stares at me in disbelief, and asks, "What?"  I want to scream JUST GIVE ME SOME D*** FOOD! But I scramble to get milk, two thin mint cookies and drink them up and gobble them up as fast as I can.  It took quite awhile for this to take affect.  I will never try that stupid stunt again! 

Oh my goodness, Melinda!!!  Are you okay?  It sounds horrible!!!  I will certainly try to learn this lesson from your awful experience rather than having to go through it myself! Bless your sweet little heart! Freddie

As Bill Engvall would say, "HERE'S YOUR SIGN!".......just kidding, glad you are better now and I can definitely put that on my list of things NOT to do after I have my surgery........thanks for being our little experimenter but DON'T DO THAT AGAIN!!!!! Wendy

Oh my Melinda that sounds really painful!!! Bless your heart. Be careful sweetie. MyHotComments
Barb

Hey I'm glad your all concern for Melinda and I'm glad she's (you) are alright too.  But how about Tim!  Gee Cybil I mean Melinda are we going to read about you in the paper! Just Kidding.  But maybe you could post a current picture of Tim maybe holding todays newspaper to confirm the date?  He must Love you cause lets face it you eat his desert (which is sacred) your all bound up, then your not, then your screaming at the poor guy. I got say from a mans point of view your not a fun date! Not that I want to get on your bad side. C' Ya Bob

Can I just say next time take some MOM or fiber and see if that may work better. Hope your feeling better.

Bob You r post cracked me up!  Tim just stood there like "duh... what now?"  I was saying "Get me some food!"  And it was a  deer in the headlights look.  I told him later, "If I ever do that again, get me something to eat!"  And he wanted to know what I wanted to eat... I said, "Milk, peanut butter, cookies, anything that can hurry up and get my blood sugar level up fast!"  I was pacing from the kitchen to the dining room, to the sofa, not knowing what to do.  I was so confused.  It was awful.  I bet he stood there like a deer in the headlights is cause I was naked! That's a man for ya. haha

Melinda I certainly know the confusion low sugar can cause, glad your OK. But I do have one question?? I just went to Kroger's and picked up a carton of  Hood's Milk and Tim's picture was on it! Whats up with that??? C' Ya Bob

You just made me squirt Crystal Light through my nose! Man...lemonade burns!!!!!

Sheesh Mel...I use MOM, the "kinder and gentler" laxative. You hit it with a triple whammy!!