What do YOU turn to?

Ok so its no suprise that I've been a little upset these past few days.  Which makes me re-visit a topic that we have touched on before...  the psychological aspect of our wls.  In my former wls days, food was surely a comfort for me.  Last night, on the way home from work, my stomach hurt, I was upset and I kept thinking of what I was going to do to lighten my mood and make myself feel better. When I got home, I asked the dear bf  what we were doing for dinner...  he asked what I wanted and I said, "Pizza, lasagna, hot fudge cakes, pepsi."  He immediately responded that IF I ate that, then I was going to Mike's house to spend the night!  He did not want to see the after effects of that kind of meal...  and really, it would have produced an episode to larger proportions than when I ran around the living room naked and screaming, "Gimme food!"  The high carb content alone would probably send me sailing down the street like a mad woman!  (dont ya love the visual?) Now I know there is no way in this world I could allow myself to eat this kind of meal.  But what I was doing was recognizing that desire inside me to turn to an old dear friend... FOOD.  After all, it surely brought me comfort for many years!  It was my friend when no one else in the world was my friend.  It soothed me, calmed me, made me feel like everything was going to be OK.  BUT!  This is such a lie!  I believed those nasty lies for so many years...  that little demon whispered in my ear and I just gave in and listened, then acquiesced to its commands...  But yesterday...  my reaction (has been and is) to ignore, reject, forbid myself to listen to that nasty little voice... it almost calls my name...  luring and enticing... right?  But if I recognize it for what it is...  a lie...  something that will hurt me in the end if I choose to endulge it...  then I can get on with things.  I ended up going to Subway and eating a chicken breast which we don't normally go there, so I felt like I gave myself a special treat.  But what calls your name?  What do you turn to when you are upset?  Are there patterns and tendencies that you need to deal with in this stage of the wls journey? I might add that there is a big problem after wls for "transfer addictions".  This basically means that instead of looking to food for comfort, the wls patient turns to something else that can become unhealthy for them.  Some get into a heapful of debt because of spending, others turn to sexual addictions (contrary to popular belief, NO this is not my transferrence addiction!  ROFL), and others turn to alcohol.  We've had some people on the board in the past (some may not remember because you may be "new") who have shared that alcohol has become a problem.  Just thought i would throw that out there to bring awareness that it can and does happen...  sad but true... 

 I have found myself turning to exercise to both relieve stress and try to stay away from habits such as grazing and turning to food. Whenever I find myself bored and want to eat I just find something to do to keep active and My mind busy. I don't drink at all hardly so no alcohol, no boyfriend so no sex addiction.. A girl has to have something.. so why not excercise ? I am the last person who would have thought I would ever enjoy exercise. Before surgery I never exercised, getting off the couch was a ordeal for me so I have come a loooonnnng ways .

Mike got a little concerned, as did my mother, that I would resort to spending money as a transfer addiction.  But, now that I have reached a weight that will remain, and I can buy a wardrobe that will last for awhile, the spending has cut way down.  And, when you have been heavy for so long and can't get into pretty clothes, I think just about any gal would say 'WOO HOO!  I CAN WEAR PRETTY STUFF!'  Now when it comes to the alcohol part, my father was an alcoholic and I am very cautious to limit my intake to once or twice a week, AFTER all of my protein requirements are met for the day...  and I created my very own recipe for a sugar free margarita...  I am very controlled in drinking, I do like the taste of the salt and sweetness of the drink together, but other than that, its the only drink I enjoy and let myself have.  Tried pina coladas. But I now have a great protein drink with that flavor...  and I know how to make my own pina colada shake too with protein, no liquor. I think we need to be self aware and ask "what are my problem areas? Do I have a problem with a transfer addiction?" And even ask others in our family who know us best. 

I'm not sure if I have turned to anything, well unless you think me going nuts in Wal-mart and buying clothes, but hey now I can buy in the stores and not off of the Internet....LOL But I did go in Wal-mart yesterday and didn't buy any clothes what so ever. I will say that I do turn to this board oh so much for inspiration and ideas. It makes a differnce when you talk to someone and you know for a fact that at some point they have been where you was and or are now. I don't know what I would have done with out this board, the Lunch Bunch, Dinner Club oh and of course I do have to mention my DH......I Love You  Honey!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Love ya folks, Cheryl

Well...when the server for the income tax preparation site I use crashed at 8:30 pm on April 15th while I was trying to finish a return for a client, I turned to ice cream. My "binge" consisted of a 4 oz cup of Haagen Das so it wasn't as bad as it could have been. And, God knew I needed the stress relief because He kept the dump fairy from coming and kicking my butt. Is this something I will do on a regular basis? NO!!!!! Aside from this episode, I have been turning to needlework to help control the urge to snack. It's hard to munch when you are doing counted cross stitch. As some of you know, I have been under a great deal of stress lately. This week has been the worst so far and I don't see it getting better for a while. The temp assignment I was working has ended and I have reopened my unemployment claim. They will now file against the temp agency as this is my most recent employer so I will be surprised if I get another assignment from them.  Also, this Friday is the 5 year anniversary of my one and only biological grandchild's birth and Saturday is the 5 year anniversary of his death. This time of year is always hard but this year the dates fall on the same days of the week too. If Bill and I also have to work a prom Saturday night I don't know if I will be able to keep it together. This weekend is always the busiest of prom season and everyone who can hold a camera works.  The night we lost Mattaeus, Bill and I had just left the hospital to go work his assigned prom. We had just gotten to Fort Campbell when our son-in-law called to let us know the baby had just died. Bill's boss managed to get someone to cover for us and we headed back to be with our daughter and DSIL and say our goodbyes to our grandson.  It was the best and the worst weekend of my life.

Susan I am sorry to hear about your grandbaby.  Marilyn is going through a hard time this week as well.  She posted earlier and asked for prayers.  I do not know what that pain is like.  I cannot even begin to comprehend it.  But you are in my thoughts and prayers this week.  Thank you for sharing as I am sure it was very difficult. 

Praying for you and your family during all of these diffcult times. Cheryl

Mel...I turn to walking, gardening and crafting...when I get into something I want almost instant results and so I keep busy basically. Susan, I am sorry for your loss keeping busy is a good thing......So you're guy is a photographer? MY 17 year old is going to her first (and only) prom this Saturday. Any tips for super shots? Beth B. in TN

In times of stress...such as now...I hate to admit it, and please don't say much about it...but I turn to sleeping pills, or my anti anxiety med...I also turn into a raging b!(#, and occasionally the nabisco 100 cal snacks.  Other than that, I try to turn to exercise.  And turn to the support of my family and friends...which sometimes turns into more stress leading to the cycle that is listed above.  That's me, do as I say, not as I do.

Tell her to relax and have a good time. That will give a more natural smile in her photos. Also, have a friend check for stuff showing that shouldn't, like the hanging straps on her dress, wild hairs, etc. Bill and I make sure any necklace clasp is turned to the back, dress tags are in, hair is neat, collars are smooth on tuxes, and that the couple (or girl) is turned so her flowers show. While not all photographers do this, the good ones will. Also, if she will stand slightly turned with one foot a little in front of the other it will give a more flattering line to her lower body. We do enjoy photographing the kids at these events. It is a lot of work but we like to see the kids enjoying themselves. We do NOT however, like the music that is usually played. We are definitely too old because it is always too loud!!! LOL