Motivation

Someone needs to kick me in the head. Jill does such a good job at posting every morning, it inspires me while I'm here at work but once 5 o'clock hits, I just have so much to do that I can't seem to get in to my old routines. Volleyball just ended for the summer, so hopefully that will free up some time. I guess my head is just in the wrong place. I'm eating more carbs than I should, which keeps me hungry all the time. I'm definitely getting all my supplements, protein, and liquids in...just not motivated to exercise. I posted some new pictures on my profile, for those that don't read my MySpace or Xanga. I also started drinking those Tropicana Fruit Squeezes. I really like them! 7-11 now has Aquafina FlavorSplash on tap, which is cool! I love my lemonade, but it gets old from time to time, plus I hate going to Wendys to get it. Now I'm just blabbering. Sorry, just felt the need to spill the beans. My normies just don't get it.

I'll set my alarm to give you a kick at 5 PM!  Any chance of getting in a workout before you go to work? 

I have to be to work at 6:30am so it's kinda hard to get one in in the morning. If I wanted it bad enough I could, I just can't imagine trying to get up at 4:00 to get a workout in. Ugh. I'll figure it out. I walk around the grocery store at lunch everyday, so that helps, but I don't get any continous walking while I'm at work. I just need to find a way to make it work. Make more dinners in the crock pot or something. Like today. I have to be at a business meeting at 7:00 and will be there until 9:10ish. I get home around 5:30. That leaves me an 1.25 hours to make dinner, spend time with B, chores, etc. before I need to leave for my meeting. I'll try to bake something and while its baking go walk for 30 minutes. Tomorrow will be better. I don't think I have anything during the evening.  Thanks for being there, sweetie. Hope your pain is going away!

Amber you have came a long way kiddo, keep focused and do what you need to keep yourself motivated. Like Jen. said maybe getting a workout in the morning , Im one to talk lol you seen the only moving I did over the weekend was swiping the credit card lol. But your beautiful an you have came to far to get  set back, take a look at your schedule see where you can fit in the work out or something or some-type of exercise since the volleyball is over, for the next few month w/ a body like your id be at the pool everyday. : )

Thanks, Melinda, you've always been a good source of encouragement. Hey I did a lot of shopping myself and you do have to move those feet! Like I posted to Jen, I'm going to try and make a better effort of preparing meals ahead of time, that way I can use that time to get a walk in or something. I just stay so stinking busy! I will make the time though. Thank you for listening :)

Ok Girlfriend....... Now remember....this comes to you with lots of love, hugs and kisses.   Always remember that this surgery was to provide you with a tool that you could effectively use to lose the weight and to regain your health.  For many of us, as we were wheeled into surgery, our thoughts were that this was our last shot.  Our last hope to obtain the freedome we desperatly sought.  I suspect you were one of those, too.   We both know that being a yo-yo dieter was not only frustrating, but was also killing our bodies and self-esteem.  You are a fighter and this is your fight to win.  You know what you need to do, and how to do it.  We are here to help and support you along the way. I do not want this to sound witchy or anything like that.  I TRUELY understand that life does get in the way and that we are often the ones to sacrafice.  remember, my husband is in the Navy and has been gone more in our marriage than home.  He is NOT one of those that is always home (just seems like it laterly).  However, since starting this journey, I have learned that our love ones do not mean to interfer in our efforts - we let them, and they do not mean to be selfish with out time - again, we let them.  I know that you have one at home that requires constant attention.  So, why not have him join in?  Make it a family effort instead of an Amber effort? I can tell you from my own personal experience that for many years dieting around my hubby was really hard.  He was very resistant to change.  I mean, to the point where we got into a doozy of a fight because I refused to cook red meat and he did not want chicken.  So, I told him that when he had a heart attack, I didn't want to hear him cry.  I know....poor choice of words.  Now, here we are, years later and even directly after my surgery he had difficulty in budging from his ways.  NOW that my son is also watching what he eats, hubby is out numbered and has succumbed to my ways.  He does not need to lose any weight, but is following weigh****chers with my son and is exercising regularly with us as well. So...my point is...get everyone on board.  Would your son truely die without the carbs/snacks in the house?  Probably not....so don't buy it.  Do you really need to go to the store daily?  Is there are storage reason as to why you cannot go once a week? Do you have to spend time each day in the house, or running errands?  If not, well then, put him on a bike and power walk along side of him.  Or get some roller blades for the two of you.  I know that they can be a bit pricey, but they sure are fun and great exercise! I completely understand your schedule thing.  I work from 0700 until 430, and then have to commute from Fort Eustis (past Newport News) to Norfolk.  So, I truley understand.  But...you make it work for YOU!  Bring your meals to work, to avoid having to shop each day.  All that does is open the door to temptation.  If you bring your meals, you are limited to what you brought, and nothing else.  Spend the time during your lunch break walking outside in the fresh air, or planning your meals for the following week (with a grocery list). Planning meals has also been a great help as it takes out the guess work.  I cannot stand to think about it in the morning. In my house, meals have to be on the table in 30 minutes.  This means alot of grilled meat, salad and veggies or fruit (especially now that summer is upon us).  As soon as I walk in the door, I either workout and then do dinner, or do dinner and workout at 700.  It just depends on what is going on that day.  Point is.....put some structure into your afterwork hours and it will remove the "what are we to do".  So....for example, today I am running on the treadmill.  So, dinner will be after my workout.  But, tomorrow, we are going to the pool after work, so dinner will be after we get back at 700.  When we go to the beach during the week, we eat dinner before going to the beach.  Also, my teenager and I spend time together chatting about our day while I'm cooking or while working out.  This helps both of us. Then, after my workout, we either eat or clean the kitchen and prepare lunches for the next day.  He has to do his, because he has to become familiar with portioning (which he is doing VERY well so far - down 17 pounds and he is on week 11).  This is something that you and your son could do together - plan/pack your meals for the next day. My plan is by 800 we are settling in.  This usually works for us. Again....the point is...make a plan and stick with it.  I know* I know - it is so easy to change your plans because of something else.  But, if you choose to allow yourself to remain on the path you are on, (no exercise, carbs, etc.) then you must accept where you are at, and no more complaining.  But, if this is not where you want to be, well then.....get up and change it. Your motivation is simply looking at yourself each day and asking if you made a concerted effort that day. Now....ask yourself......why are you setting yourself up for failure?  Do you think that you are not worthy?  YOU ARE!!!!!  But, not doing what you know you should be doing is in fact setting yourself up for failure. I hope that I do not sound like I am perfect, because Lord knows that I am not!  Do I follow the rules all of the time?  Nope.  I struggle each and every day with head hunger and impulse snacking.  So...I do understand. Again....this was NOT to be witchy, cause it is hard.  I know it is.  But, you have to make the decision of what it is that you want.  Only YOU can get what YOU want. So....step away from the Teddy Grahams (you need a clear head - not one filled with sugar) and make your decisions. Love ya, and rememebr.........WE ARE IN THIS TOGETHER!

Thanks, Jill. I do know that everything you say is to help and support me, I would never take it out of context. Sometimes I just need a reminder. I know deep down that I'm not really doing as bad as I come off with, I think I just get in a funk and it takes over my brains. I definitely need to schedule better. I schedule EVERYTHING except dinners. I use to, but I had a hard time following them so I quit doing it. My son has done a great job at getting on board with this, the husband does okay, but I only see him one day a week as it is. I guess I buy the crap to treat him once in a while. Thankfully, I still have the will power to only have a few bites.  Cutting out the shopping at work would probably help the hunger issues and the random snacking. I only go there because its across the street and I can walk in the air conditioning. Maybe I'll plan to only go over there on Thursdays. All the new sales come out on Wednesdays and that will work for me. The rest of the week I'll try to just walk around the Municipal Center if its not too hot. I get really dizzy in the sun for some reason.  Okay. I'm off to plan my dinners for the rest of the week and to make it my personal goal to follow through! Tonight is turkey chili turkey dogs, its our compromise.  Thanks again, Jill, I do know I'm not alone and I'm glad I can call you my friend! See you soon!

I am SO glad that you did not take it out of context.  I really did not want it to come off witchy.

I completely understand the whole funk thing.  Right about 25 pounds left to go I felt like - this is it....I'm done.....DRATS!  But, hang in there. For me, structure has been the key.  Weekends are VERY difficult for me as there isn't much structure to them, so every Monday, I have to undo the damage from the weekend "Hi, my name is Jill and I'm a grazer".

As for your hubby, don't buy him crap.  Make him a decent meal using what you can reasonably eat.  You do NOT need to buy him food to make him feel worthy, welcomed or at home. (And yes I am guilty of this. I do this on occasion for my hubby, but the rule is it has to go to work) Write it down.  On whatever day you plan your meals, write them down and post on the fridge.  Definately makes the morning rush alot easier to deal with.  I do mine on notebook paper and post on the fridge like a calendar, so no one has to ask what are they having to eat.

I think you are right - cut out the daily shopping.  For me, a grocery store is a safe haven.  Can you belive it?  All of my friends are there - Ben and Jerry, Little Debbie, etc.  Right after surgery, I hated shopping, but went wondering through the stores anyways.  Now, I buy things that I do not eat.  Example, Coso had a box of Murray's Sugar Free cookies (about 6 months ago), I recently gave the box to my Mom (unopened).  So, the food is still an issue for me.  A grocery store for me, is like an ABC store for an alcoholic.  One of the hardest places for me to go to. Maybe there are other places you could walk at during your lunch.  Or, will your job allow you to leave early if you work during lunch?  Maybe you could work something out with your boss.  And rememebr, walking in the store really isn't doing much good as it does not get your heart up (unless you see a really good snack - haha).  What about walking in place at your desk a few times a day? Turkey dogs w/ chili sound good.  I'm having grilled salmon w/ asparagus and the guys are having grilled chicken w/ salad (too hot to cook). But, I'm glad you were not offended.

I am a list freak! I make lists of lists, hehehe. I found a Meal Planning Template for Excel and I've already filled it out and printed two copies. One for my office and one for the frig at home. I really hope this simplifies things and makes the difference. I already feel more at ease and less pressure of figuring things out.  The best part is the snacks, that is a huge problem because it causes a big grazing issue.  I've decided to only go to Harris Teeter on Thursdays to buy groceries for the whole week and walk outside the other 3 days of the week. We'll see how it works out. I'm stubborn enough, I'll make this work if it kills me! As far as little walks go, I do that all day long. I'll walk down the hallways to the other shops. I usually get 1.5 miles doing that. I have to check the fax machine down the hall all the time too, hehe!  I will get rid of these last 20 to 30 pounds!

There you go!  That's the fighter I know and love You WILL do it!  i KNOW you will.  You want it too bad. Like I said, i know it is hard.  Every day I have to struggle with this.  It is NOT easy, and I know 1st hand that it isn't.  I know that I could make this easy by succumbing to the temptations and eating crap, but that is not where I want to be in my life.  So, instead, I battle with the demons that often control my thoughts.  I know, I know...I do have food issues that I need to deal with, and I am slowly doing that.  Trying to divert my attentions to other things - today it is working out.  I just hope that in 1 year, it will still be working out. So...you know what you need to do and often it means slowing down a bit to re-group and remember that it is all about you. You are doing GREAT!