Need to vent..

Hi, welcome back and glad that you have shared your story with us. Like everyone has said go back to the basic and start again and you will be amazed at what it will do for you. At lease you know what is going on and just take it one day at a time. Do not listen to the downs that some people will do and say just stay strong and know that we are all here for you and will support you in anyway that we can all you need to do is ask. I will be praying for you and ask God to take care of you and heal your body.

Wow Randy!  I was not expecting to sign on this morning and see such an inspiring, strong & courageous post.  The strength you are showing by sharing your story, reaching out for support/guidance, and admitting that you can't do this alone is outstanding & definitely shows me that you will push through all of this. Yes you have a tough road ahead but you have the means to get through it.  You are not alone.  Between your partner, your ex-wife and friends here on the board you have a great level of support but you also have God.  I agree with Christina that counseling may be something that would be very helpful right now.  Maybe one that specializes with HIV clients or one that specializes in food issues.  Talk to the health dept, or your doctors to see if they can reccommend someone.  Going back to the basics and using your tool is also a big thing.  You will feel a lot better about yourself and your situation by taking care of yourself.  Being healthy will make a big difference on your everyday life.  Arm yourself with knowledge.  Knowing all you can makes such a difference when you are facing a struggle.  The idea of researching more into the mental aspect of the sexual experiences after surgery and gathering more information in order to lecture & share your story is a great idea.  There is so little information out there about some of the mental issues that come after surgery, the "transfer addictions" and such.  It can be a hard road but could help so many others in so many ways. My thoughts & prayers are with you, your partner & your family as you begin this part of your journey. 

Hi Randy, I am so sorry that you are dealing with all of this. I so admire you for reaching out for support. I will keep you and Allen in my prayers. God Bless,

Randy, isn't our board awesome?!!!! The VA folks are the best. I want to extend my prayers to you and Allen and your ex wife. You know now that you can come to the VA board for support on anything. I hope you can get back to the eating basics and find a professionsl to help you through the emotional eating. Best wishes to you. Take care.

Wow there you are my MIA friend I wondered where you had been. Im so sorry to here this news, but you know we are always here for our family and you are our family!! Dont ever forget that! I am always here even if you have to pm me. you have my cell# and can call when you need to. Please stay positive and as others have said go back to the basics w/ your water, protien and exercise. Check into some professional help w/ your needs to help you if you need there is nothing wrong with getting help we ALL need it from time to time. I know myself I at times use food as a crutch and its wrong I know it as well as others but as you have said its a bad habit we need to get over, and there is help out there for us so use it. You keep your head high and stay up and come here to vent when you need to we are here for you. God bless you and prayers going up for you and your friend hugs.....

Hi Randy, My thoughts and prayers aare with you and Allen.  I know it is a scary thing but you can get past all of this..just concentrate on getting back on track with your weight loss.   You can do it and you look great. Hugs, Betsy

Hi, Randy: I am relatively new to the Board, and though we have never met, your story inspired me and I wanted to write you to tell you that you and yours are in my thoughts and prayers during this challenging time.  One of the board members mentioned knowledge, and how powerful it is.  I would like to second that...the more you know, the better off you are.  Read, ask questions...it's all good...you'll be so much better off for it. Now, more than ever, is the time to get back to basics...build your body up and take good care of it.  Protein...water...healthy choices....all good stuff. Best of luck to you...stay strong! Cindy

Hi Randy.  Ok, you don't know me from Adam either, but so far quite a few of us have shown you that not all people judge negatively.  Those that do are either ignorant of the facts, or, if they are knowledgeable, then they choose to be stupid.  Those are the ones that you don't need in your life.  Remember that they only have as much power over you that you choose to allow. I'm curious about something.  Even though you were unsure about posting your "story," how do you feel now?  Sometimes seeing your feelings, your thoughts, your fears, your admissions in the written word can help to put things into perspective.  Maybe journaling, if you don't already do it, would be an added tool for you.  As for getting some counseling, I have a theory...95% of the world's population should be in therapy...the other 5% are in denial!!  Take comfort in knowing that you have a lot of people in your corner & this is one walk you don't have to walk alone. I want to thank you for posting your situation...you are very brave person.

You have all made me feel much better today...like i said before i was skeptical about posting....but did need support...it has helped alot....i just got in from walking 5 miles and that made me feel much better also...I mud\st admit i have had a few nervous spells today as to wondering who is reading my most personal feelings....but you know....we all must be vulnerable at some time...Thanks again to you all...its good to know that there are truly nonjudgmental people out there..im glad you have been here for me...also gonna try to post some new pics in a lil while....Hope you have all had a good day...and please keep me in your thoughts and prayers.. Huggs to all!!! Randy