confused and upset

So i just learned about this procedure this past weekend, and I have been researching it ever since.  I have found absolutely no one *****grets having it done, I've reviewed all the medical data I can find etc.  I was really excited about this, until I went to work today.  I work for a Doctor whom I respect very much.  Naturally I wanted his medical opinion about this surgery.  Long story short recently I went on a program and lost about 26 pounds in a little over 2 months.  Which I might add is very much like all of the post op people eat on here already.  Anyways, he says that he likes the surgery much better than the band or the RNY, but then proceeds to ask why I was giving up on my program and thinking of surgery again.   He's like.. "what if you have this done and then don'nt like it, it's not reversible".  I don't know I guess he just kinda made me feel like a quitter, and I'm not.  I told him that I wanted this surgery to go along with the new program I'm on as a toole.  I'm confused, because what if he's right?  What if I do this and for whatever reason end up regretting it, what if I don't and regret not doing it?  I 'm upset because I let myself start to get excited again, and think OMG...finally a surgery for me, one that I'm not  so scared to have, finally it's my turn to get rid of this weight that is smothering me for good.  It's my turn to be on the other side looking back, and saying that I finally did it.  My head is racing with arguments of don't listen to other people do what you want, and what if they are right.  Anyone have any good advice?  Any inspiration?  How did you all finally make "the decision" to do this and not look back?  Thank you for listening to me. :-)  Sometimes it just helps to get it out. 

I really struggled with the "failure" feeling when deciding on surgery as well.  I had lost weight so many times on diets, only to gain it back.  I know I can lose weight on a diet - I just can't keep it off!!

One statistic that helped me was this:  Only <5% of diet and exercise patients are successful long term.  WLS patients (with the exception of lap band) have success ranging from 60-80% over the long term.

Why would I want to keep yo-yo dieting (because I've already proven that's what I do) and wrecking my metabolism?  If I had never dieted before - then yes, I'd say I should have given it the old college try.  This isn't a first resort - it is a final resort. 

You're right though - it is not reversible.  Do your research, read these boards, talk to surgeons and patients, read the stats, look over the diet requirements and exercise requirements afterward.  Be sure of your decision.  Then, if you still feel excited and happy, go for it!

I don't know why anyone would regret this surgery.  Sure I can't eat as much as I used to, but if I choose, I can eat everything I used to.  There is nothing I can't have.  I just know there is absolutely no way I would have lost 97 pounds on my own.  Years and years of dieting proved that to me.  This was the only thing that worked.  Sure you still have to put effort into it, but it's so much easier.  I've lost 30 pounds before, but the minute I went off the program, I gained it all back.  You can't go off this program.  Even when you "cheat", you can only have so much before you're full.  Now if I choose to have pizza I can maybe eat one small slice instead of 4 or 5 regular slices. 

You have to go what is right for you.  Don't let anybody else talk you into it or out of it.  All I can say is that I'm the happiest I have been in a really long time.  Nothing feels better than having people look at you cuz you're HOT and not cuz you're fat.  It's the greatest.  If you're going to do this, do it for you.  You deserve to feel good.

Regret the VSG? I think that would be tough - you're completely normal, just with a smaller stomach and less ghrelin. You won't be able to sit down and binge on 3 McDonald's meals at a sitting, but other than that, you'll pretty much still be normal, and without having to worry about anything slipping, eroding, needing fills, etc.

I guess I don't see his point - no it can't be undone, but why would you WANT to undo it?

Like you gachic76 I felt like a failure and a quitter for needing or wanting the vsg surgery until i talked to my nutritionist. She stated, you are not a failure and you have what is called metabolic syndrome.  In other words you have yo-yo dieted all of your adulthood and shot your metabolism to heck. I would watch what i ate, exercised only to have minimal weight loss. The minute you eat something you not suppose to the weight would come back with extra pounds.  I am an RN who works pre and post op surgery  so, i knew what was involved. I spoke to many people who had the vsg and no one regrets it. I did a lot of research on the MD's who performed this procedure and traveled 1 1/2 hrs. from home to get what i thought was a highly respected, skilled surgeon. I am 2 weeks post-op and doing great. I don't think i will regret this procedure because as a nurse i see very obese people who just can't take care of themselves and have alot of medical issues.  I surely don't want that for myself.  I feel people who have had partial gastrectomys for cancer or some other med. problems do very well and live a long life with no problem. I have a good friend who had this done due to CA several years ago. I also have a friend who had the vsg 2 years ago and has reached her goal plus and stated, i eat whatever i want it is in just much smaller portions so, that helps me alot.  Good luck, I was in the same shape as you before having my surgery and felt I just don't want to fight this weight problem for the rest of my life.

I thought very long and hard, every day, 24 hours a day about "what if I regret this?" for about 6 months.  Until I this conversation occurred:
 
little angel on my shoulder - "well, what exactly is it about the surgery that I would regret?"

  little devil on my shoulder - "well, stupid, that I won't be able to eat like a pig anymore!"

 little angel - "but why would I want to continue to eat like a pig?"

  little devil - "because it makes me feel better, moron!"

little angel - "but it only makes me feel better for about 10 min while I eat, then I feel ashamed and disgusted with myself."

  little devil - "so?"  (great comeback, huh?)

 little angel - "so, I'm tired of being tired, ashamed, and disgusted with myself, I'm tired of the pain that I am putting my body through, and I'm tired of losing and gaining, losing and gaining, and feeling like a failure every time that happens, and I'M NOT GONNA DO IT ANYMORE!  so what if i cant eat 5000 calories a day anymore?,  if the only thing i am going to regret is that i won't be able to stuff my face with as much food as i want especially when I'm angry, sad, bored, frustrated, etc...then there's nothing to regret, because i shouldn't be doing that anyway, surgery or not.  it's time to start eating in a healthy way, that's going to promote a healthy lifestyle, even if it is a little radical for others, I'm doing this to save my life, so that I can be around for my daughter, parents, husband, and for ME! 

then "poof" the little devil disappeared...

she still comes out every once in a while, when i see something i want to shove down my throat and can't,  just to say "i told you so" but then I think about how much better I feel, physically, and emotionally, how proud I am of me and how proud my husband and siblings are of me, and the little devil in me has nothing to say, and disappears again.

What a perfect anology for anyone that is strong and brave enough to have surgery!  I have been truly motivated by the board yet again this evening! 

I loved your "little angel/little devil" conversation. Good analogy! Makes my decision more concrete b/c I can totally relate...

Prin

funny little angel

GOOD STUFF...

the angel/devil advice...

youre my new hero...

well, for today...