feel like such a loser

I feel like such a failure tonight. And as my husband wisely pointed out its wrong of me to have risked my life to go under the knife because I wanted to lose weight so badly and make my family worry I might die only to cheat on my diet. Well my patients had a potluck tonight and I ate 3 half cookies. Not at one time because I was stuffed after I ate half a chocolate chip cookie, then hour later I ate half a large peanut butter cookie, and then guilt did not deter me as i went back a 3rd stinkin time for half of a icing cookie. WTF is wrong with me?? I'm just sick, sick, sick. I told myself on the way home tomorrow I will start anew but man I really am ashamed of myself. And to be so persistent about going back for more-I dont want to let this become a way of life for me. Anyhow I think I will drink a fat protein shake before the Monday night potlucks in the future (they are at work & I must work this night so its not like I can dodge them) and maybe I'll be so stuffed I can resist the crap. Thanks for listening everyone-I recognize I'm not the only foodaholic on this site but after surgery to have such blatant disregard for my sleeve-well I feel like the only one to do that.

     I don't have any wisdom filled answers for you, but possibly a couple of suggestions.  First of all beating yourself up over a cookie and a half will not really accomplish anything. If anything it is likely to undermine the things you are doing well.  Of course you wish you had not done that right now, but my guess is that in the past if you had stopped at  that you would have been pretty proud of yourself. 
      In my opinion  after having this surgery, there is the potential to feel like a failure with very little cause in the grand scheme of things.  I would write down how you felt about it and come up with a plan for what to do next week and seal it in an envelope.  If you learn from this than it isn't a huge deal.  If this is a Monday thing where you work then plan what you can take so that you will be able to eat at the same time...even if it is different food. 
      I can not really eat much at all when I go to potlucks because I have been sleeved and have celiac disease too.  I had a major pity party after the first one I went to, but now I take ham slices, a laughing cow cheese and a couple of pickles and just sit there and make my own ham wraps.  I usually take a few grapes or something to end on a sweet note.  I am able to enjoy people's company without feeling deprived. 
      Once you handle it sucessfully and avoid the cookies next time, then shred up the envelope and toss it away.  When I do that I feel I have gotten one more part of this lifestlye under control.
Best of luck...sorry this got so long.

Hey quit beating yourself up for being human! This weight loss journey is a lifelong thing, not a fad. So if you treat yourself once in a while and then jump back on the high protein train guess what.. your just like everyone else! Even those skinny *******s eat junk food and cookies sometimes right! Enjoy your life and tell your husband to drop the Jewish guilt. Your doing a good enough job of beating yourself up!!! ...Craig

Well said!  P.S. I chuckled at Jewish guilt comment..lol

I would stop with the guilt as well.  This journey is as much about weight loss as it is about learning to eat a new way for the rest of our lives.  You are going to have to deal with potlucks and holidays and every day cravings.  Having a bit of a cookie is not throwing yourself under the bus. Would you have stopped at a cookie or two before the surgery? I wouldnt have! 

A protein shake may not keep you full long enough to deter eating something over the course of a lengthy social event. Some dense protein is more likely to stick with you throughout the entire period of temptation. Since you are only about one month post op, I'm not sure what you are able to tolerate in the way of dense proteins, but in my experience for that time frame, something like tuna salad, or tender grilled chicken were much more likely to keep me full for a longer period of time. You may not be tempted to eat any treats at all, or if you are, may be that 1 or 2 bites would satisfy.
Good luck to you as you plan strategies to make wiser food choices for future social events.

Sonya,

As the others have stated here, you are only human! Don't beat yourself up over this. Instead use it as a rallying point and be stronger moving forward. As everyone here knows getting sleeved is not a quick fix, but a lifestyle change.....that doesn't mean it's overnight or over a week....it is over a LIFE time. Follow your plan to have a shake before your next potluck and then look at those cookies and tell them that they WILL NOT stand in the way of Sonyagettinghealthy!

Good luck and God bless!

OMedic

I completely disagree!
My whole point was that there's no urgency to always stay on the diet. Enjoy the Potluck, Enjoy Easter, Enjoy Thanksgiving, Enjoy Christmas, ..Birthdays, etc. What's the urgency to never vary from the diet plan? It's not a F'ing prison sentence, it's a lifestyle change. It's not all or nothing so eat a couple bites of food off the program, who cares (besides your husband)???

My $.02 ... Craig

I hear you and your guilt trip. Yep I think it is normal. We all have food addiction habits to overcome and most of us beat ourselves up for minor failures along the way. Now get past that because it was yesterday and today is a new day. A suggestion for next time...drink, drink, drink.  I find that I can't eat as much if I keep myself full of liquid.  Also be careful around those nasty carb foods that seem to go down too easily,like cookies or crackers. If you need to munch grab a piece of cheese or slice of cold meat so that you are getting good protein. When the occasional cookie jumps into your mouth..ENJOY it...a cookie once in a while won't ruin your success in dieting. I am LOVING my sleeve and an occassional cookie too!

I occasionally slip up, too!  But for me, the beauty of the sleeve is knowing that the restriction is there and even if I do make a bad choice, not much of that bad choice is going to get in!  If I thought I could never have a cookie again, or worried everytime I ate something I shouldn't, I don't think I could be successful with the sleeve.  Just get right back on track and move forward and try not to over think things and feel guilty!  You will be just fine!

Beverly