how do your sig. others react to loss???

 My experience echoes that of most of the people replying to this post. I had yo-yoed up & down from 150 to 311 and back down to 190 (and back up again), so by the time my SO & I got together, the loose skin was already there to begin with. I was around 190 at the time, and gained until my pre-op weight of 275. He's been with me & attracted to me throughout the gain. I am now 3.5 months out & down over 45 lbs. He has definitely been acting more attracted to me. I agree with the other ladies that the biggest factor is how *I* am feeling about me. Being more confident, energetic and positive just makes you more attractive! Don't fixate on maybes a year down the line. Concentrate on reaching a healthy place and improving your quality of life. In all likeliness, that'll spill over into your relationship. 

GL!
Somayeh

 I've been with my SO for 15 years.  I had a child previously so I was already 170lbs when I met him and he liked that and he's gone through times early in our relationship that he hated my weight gain and was quite mean about it but now we're comfortable with each other and our intimate relationship is better than it ever has been.  We joke about when I'll have "national geographic boobs" but he did say once "It'll be weird putting my arms around you."   Which kinda made me sad but excited at the same time. He recently lost 50lbs (by drinking coffee constantly and starving) and is looking really good and I want to match him. 

He says -- as long as I don't turn into a **** (we've got a terrible sense of humor) then he's fine with whatever I want to do! 

I'm preop. I used to weigh 160lbs when we met. He suggested WLS. He is my number 1 supported. I can tell when he gets annoyed about me constantly talking about the new things I have learned. But overall he is being perfect. He is hoping that it will make me more confident as my jealousy issues have increased along with my weight. And he is already "saving" so I can have plastic surgery and new boobs. He has even "volunteered" to pick out the new size boobs.

More importantly we are prepay and this will take a huge chunk of our savings and he is all in.

 From a guys thoughts. If he loves you it does not matter if you are big small short or tall. He will be more concerned for your health. I had VSG 6-5-12 my wife had VSG 6-6-12. I made the decision to have WLS first and she has supported me all of the way. 345 my heaviest now down 85 lbs. my wife is doing well and is as beautiful as the day I met her some 25 years ago. If he is there for you it just does not matter loose skin, boobs or not he will always love you.

My kinda-sorta boyfriend was not supportive and objects to my smaller behind.  One more complaint, and he'll be my kinda-sorta former boyfriend.  Life's too short.

OTOH, my ex-husband loved me at whatever size I was, and never complained about it.  During our marriage, my weight went from 140 to 340, with tons of ups and downs in between.  He's ex for a lot of good reasons, but I know that while he loved me, he loved me for who I am, not for what I looked like. Every one of you deserves to experience that.

I was with a guy for 4 years and we broke up shortly before my surgery. I stil "interact" with him and he's my best friend. While we were together I went up between 100 pounds. He NEVER mentioned it. Now I went back down 130 pounds and he says the sex is a lot better and that I look REALLY amazing. ONE time he mentioned the skin and it's because I pressed him about it. I asked him if I look like an "alien" and where and he grabbed my arms and then I cried. He told me that guys don't care about it and that my "stock" went up 1,000% because I look so much better. On another note, I've been seeing a guy for a few months and I showed him my "before" pics and he said he would have "messed" with me back then but he likes me like this too. He also said boobs are SUPPOSED to be LONG so I guess that works out for me! LOL! He doesn't mention the skin and he says he loves my body but he has mentioned things in a round about way saying that losing weight is only half the battle and that if people don't exercise then they will be flabby. He's also said that he's been with girls that have gone up and down in weight and he stayed with them because he loved them. My point is that when someone really cares about you, even if there are flaws on the outside it won't be a total deal breaker. You gained 100 pounds in 3 years... I guarantee losing that 100 pounds is only going to make the situation BETTER!

20+ yrs of ballet leaves me quite flexible & agile... however the gut still gets in the way... I want this sukka GONE!!! The husband says he doesnt care.... let's see how much he cares when it's gone....

I'll echo the sentiment of everyone here. My husband has known me since I was 15 and a size 10. He loved me all the way to size 24 and would have loved me beyond. I am back down to a 12/14 now and feeling great. He loves the "new/old" me and is happy that I'm happy. Yes, there are the occasional insecurities and wonderings that pop in his head: "is she going to be one of those women that dresses trashy and decides she needs a whole new life to go with this new body!!" He never says that out loud by the way, but after 21 years, I know what he's thinking. I give him all the gentle reassurances that I can that nothing was missing from my marriage before so I'm not looking for anything new and improved now. We are both closer as a result of this process. I get to be the girl I feel he fell in love with all over again and that is the best ego boost I could have asked for out of this whole process.

I do have a cautionary tale though. I have a friend who had WLS 2 years before me who had a rocky marriage at best. Her husband was attracted to "larger" women and wasn't supportive of her decision. He wanted to know why anyone else's opinion of her should matter, he liked her and she should stay the way HE liked. As you can guess, she got skinny, ran around on him and they are divorced. She did go the "****ty is my new name" route and it exposed the problems in an already bad marriage.

My advice is take an honest look at your relationship and inspect it through open eyes. If its good now, it will be even better later. If it's so-so now(at best), it might be an uphill battle.

Kind of hijack... Ohhh yeah, I've heard many stories of the "****ty is my new name" girls. I have a friend like that. I guess since ****ty was my old name and it was my name while I was big, I really have no reason for it to be my name again. There's no new found freedom now that I'm getting smaller. Good thing you put that out there though, I forgot all about that.

Well, I've always been "****ty" for my husband, even back in the dating days, so that was never a "new" itch I needed to scratch either.