My lowest adult weight since college -- now entering uncharted territory!

You are soooo on target!  Who let you into my head?  I think the weird is a basic fear of the unknown.  An earlier poster indicated how cool it is that we get this opportunity to transform ourselves, and how rare that it.  So I am now inching out of fear and into determination to finish the journey!

Thanks for wise insights!  Based on your sound experience, all F***ing in my life will be limited to my husband, and not with any head games!  LOL!  That should provide more exercise anyway!

Unchartered territory sounds about right...but that's when the adventure really begins, right?  :-) 

You're doing great - keep working hard and following all the great advice on here and you'll figure things out. 

Thanks so much for the encouragement!  I get lots of great advice here -- now I just have to make sure I follow it!

Congrats on the SV!  I think I can relate to how you feel.  I am getting so close to the end and then what?  I am down to 176.5 this morning and I honestly can not remember being this low.  I was married 26 years ago and my wedding dress was a size 16.  I am wearing a size 12 now and they becoming lose.  I know I have worn a size 12 before because I found some in my closet but if I hit a 10 or below, this will definitely be new territory.

What I am struggling with is what my goal should be.  My original goal was to get to what my surgeon said which was 189 and that is where she thinks I should stay.  Forget that!  I have surpassed that by 12.5 lbs and still feel like I can lose more weight and comfortably maintain it.  The one thing that I do know is that I will never (yep I said the n word) let myself go above the 189 mark.  After hitting that goal, I thought there are a lot of people that are getting to a healthy bmi, so I have been shooting for 154 which is the top of the bmi chart for me.  That is only 22.5 lbs and again I am comfortable and not feeling deprived on what I eat.  Saw my PCP yesterday and she asked me what my goal was and I told her.  She thinks that is too low.  She thinks 165.  I just don't get why they all think I should not shoot for a healthy goal weight.  I will see her again in a month and talk to her about it again.  I just know at some time that I will have to add back more calories in order to maintain a weight but I don't want to quit to soon.  Once I hit that goal weight I will also need to focus more on my body fat %.

Then the fear sets in as to what am I going to focus on once I do hit my goal weight.  I have been focused on this goal and it has been an important part of my life but then what.  It is all scary to me!!!!!!!!!!!

Again congrats on your accomplishment!

Welcome to weirdness!  So glad to have company here!  My wedding dress was a size 18 -- more than 30 years ago!  Interestingly, when I met with my doc earlier this year -- he expects me to reach 100% EWL.  He's not saying things like, statistically VSG patients reach 60%, so your goal should be xxx.  His goal for me is 100% EWL or 30% body fat.  SCARY!

Hitting any of these goals is so far outside my realm of comprehension, that I have no fear of maintenance -- it's so far in the future that I can't even think out it!  Well except for when I refer to my stalls as "maintenance practice"!

Congrats on your success as well!  Off we go into the unknown!

First off, today is a day for celebration! (No, your 18 year old weight does not count! AT least, I did not let mine count for me. I got down to 155 and looked like a skinny kid. Not such a good look now...) You MUST, I repeat, must do something wonderful for yourself. I don't care what it is, but it needs to be wonderful for you. (Preferably not food related...)

As for working your way down, you know what to do. It is a matter of sticking to your plan with tenacity and unwavering commitment. AT times this can be very hard, but you have come this far. there is no sense in stopping now.

You may have hidden fears about stripping away these last pounds. Figure out what they are. These fears are a NORMAL part of the WL process. Fat is comforting and masking and it hides us from not only the world, but from parts of ourselves we don't wish to know very well. You may feel some emotional discomfort. That's okay. Sit with it. Figure out what is eating you. If you reflect on and acknowledge these fears/worries/discomforts you will be stronger for it. Frankly, I did not do this until maintenance because for me that is when things started to pop up. I am finding that I am knowing myself much better and feeling very confident and powerful about who I am because of the process I am going through on this journey.

As we get farther and farther out, those of us who are finding success also find that this process is about far more than losing weight and fat. It's about finding out who we are and what brought us to obese in the first place. Scary on one hand, but so worth it in the end.

Keep the path!

Thanks!  It is hard to figure out what the fears are -- I am working on that, and have found you are exactly right.  In order to address the fear, you have to honestly name it for what it is - then develop the strategies.  

I still end up at the basic "fear of the unknown", but I can't put my finger on what I'd be afraid of?  My husband has been great (after all he married me at 200 lbs!), my friends are super supportive, I have a good job, etc.  I've been scouring other posts from people at or near goal, seeing if they identify something that "clicks" for me.

So for now, I am focusing on sticking to plan -- which is harder than it sounds.  I've noticed that since I'm a stairstep loser, that after I have a good loss, my inner child will try to tempt me and rationalize it with  "You know you won't lose anything this week anyway!".  What's with that?  Those few bites here and there can be the difference between losing and gaining for me!

I don't comfort myself with food anymore -- and I am very aware when I'm bored, hurt, lonely and head to the fridge! 

Here's what I have in mind for a reward -- a BIG vacation next year.  My husband really, really wants to do an African Safari -- of course I did not want to do that at 260 pounds!  We are both avid photographers, so I'm saving up, and planning that for next year.  By then, I should be able to comfortably go everywhere and do everything -- so I keep telling myself, "Do you want to SEE the elephants or BE the elephant!" LOL!  Hopefully, that will keep me going while I figure this stuff out!

You've done all this hard work.......celebrate!  The unknown is always scary.......but you have shown how strong you are and how determined you are to get to whatever goal you set for yourself.  I know you can continue on and find the success you are seeking. 

I totally get what you're saying, too, as I haven't been this weight in something like 40 years, maybe longer.  Sometimes I look at myself and think "where did these bones come from?" or "holy crap, I'm verging on looking normal" or any of a number of similar comments I make to myself.  We have lost more than weight........we have lost the ability to recognize our thinner selves.  Obviously, I don't mean that literally, but I think you get my meaning.  Maybe what this is really about is learning to love our new selves.........we sure didn't do a great job of loving our old selves..........at least I didn't.

Rejoice!  Get a pedicure.  Plant some flowers.  Dance around the room and sing the songs you dance to.  But CELEBRATE!!!

Ree   

Thanks Ree!  I am thinking about you and keeping you in my thoughts and prayers as you venture into some unknown territory!  You are exactly right -- we don't do enough to celebrate and bring joy into our lives -- and into the lives of others!  

We can change that -- of course, being a Type A, I'll have to put a note on my calendar "Celebrate!"

Let's party!