Goal Weight and the Variables ???

That is true. Southerners tend to want to have a little weight on them. Size 10 is fat to a lot of the world, especially since they often say size 10 is plus size for models. I never liked that skinny super model look. It think that any woman looks better if she has curves and a little meat on her bones, but that is just my preference.

You bring up an interesting point about being African American and what is thought of as normal sized. I wonder if this perception is based on a simple intrinsic knowledge of what is healthy in different races. I read recently in Fat Chance, by Robert H. Lustig, MD, MSL that Metabolic Syndrome begins typically at different BMI levels in different racial groups. In Caucasian people Metabolic Syndrome diseases begin to pop up around a BMI of 30 (which is why in our Western Medicine culture that was the magic BMI number chosen for obesity). In Asians Metabolic Syndrome appears at BMIs between 25 and 30. However, in those of African decent Metabolic Syndrome diseases don't usually manifest until a BMI of 35 is reached.

Given this bit of info, it seems to me that as races we have developed over the millennia a sense of what is healthy and have adjusted our personal aesthetics to reflect that knowledge.

Maybe I'm crazy, but it makes sense to me!

I remember reading an article that mentioned this too. It makes a lot of sense to me too.

At 20, the insurance weight charts said 145 was normal so my goal was 145. At 47 the BMI charrts said 164 was normal so that was my goal. My surgeon said that I could expect to lose 160 pounds (77% of my excess weight) That would have been about 220. That would still be obese, so I set my goal for overweight instead of obese. So I'm still letting the BMI chart rule my decision. 

When I lost 240 pounds ten years ago, I got below 160. I honestly didn't feel any better at 160 than 180, though. My main goal is to get healthy this time, eliminate sleep apnea and other health problems. 

I found this website that allows you to calculate a better ideal weight based on age and I guess what the average weight of other women of the same age.

http://www.halls.md/ideal-weight/body.htm

I see a lot of responses to goal weights. They fall into categories:

1) Afraid to actually get down to a normal weight on the charts (or even just a healthy weight for that individual)

These are the people who self-sabotage, start to eat poorly once they lose about 50% of excess weight and make disparaging remarks about people who are at a "normal" BMI as being gaunt or anorexic or skeletal or complain that they will be that if they accept their surgeon's goal weight for them. Sometimes they get over this hump because their bodies won't stop losing and they have no choice in the matter but to accept their bodies were meant to be smaller. But often they are online making excuses for why they couldn't possibly be a smaller number than they are without really even trying to be that number.

2) Obsessed with being at a certain number no matter what

These are people who get down to a reasonable weight, one that looks good on them and is healthy. But it's not within the normal range on the BMI charts. Or maybe it's just not the number they picked at the beginning of the journey. Or maybe they got down to a lower number but then bounced back a few pounds and are now obsessed with getting back to their lowest weight even though maintaining that lower weight requires sacrifices they aren't willing to make on a regular basis. So then they start fighting. They are constantly on a diet and lose the same few pounds over and over. In some ways, they aren't in a different mental place than they were pre-op only instead of losing and gaining 50-100 pounds all the time, they are losing and gaining the same 2-20 pounds. For many of these, the 5DPT and other crash diets are a regular part of their lives.

3) People who are happy with where they end up

There are actually a lot more people in this group than you'd think but they don't tend to be posting about their weight so you don't see them. They eventually settle on a weight that is comfortable for them. That takes as much work to maintain as they are willing to put in and that feels good and they are happy with. It may be a normal BMI or it may not. If they get a little higher than they are comfortable with, they cut back on the sweets or make more of an effort to get to the gym so it's not like they are just accepting whatever weight they are no matter how high it gets. And it's not like they don't have their days when they freak out because they are no longer at that lowest possible weight they got to for 2 seconds in the first year pre-op or because their happy weight doesn't happen to fit into the "Normal" range on those charts. But most of the time they are at their "happy weight" and are okay with it.

For me, I don't go by the charts, but I don't completely reject them either. I also don't care so much about the actual number on the scale. I care the most about what I see in the mirror and how my clothes fit. I also care about how much effort I have to put into maintaining my weight. Those first two years I was completely obsessed with my weight and I'm just not in that place any more. My first 2 years I was at my "ideal" weight with 17-18% body fat and reaching some of my lowest weights ever and in a size 2 and flirting with a size 0. But it was a lot of work and it took a lot of out me mentally. 

I am at a higher body fat percentage now (estimated 20-25%) and a higher weight, flirting with a size 4 instead of 0 but mostly a size 2 still. But I have more energy for other pursuits and feel like I have more perspective on life and am less obsessed. (I do have a tendency to get obsessive so I have to watch that.) I consider myself to be at my happy weight now rather than my ideal weight. I still like how I look in the mirror and I'm still healthy. In some ways I actually look better now though in others I looked better than.  I have more of a spare tire around my middle now but I have more boobs and am less bony in the chest and hips. I think it's more of a personal preference which is better.

So I guess I'm in category 3. It's a nice place to be. 

I am having issues right now with this! I am officially a year out - plus 7 days - and I cannot get this last 10 pounds off. I keep hitting 167 and then backing up to 169 and I want to go to 160. I also know myself: I am content. I eat my protein (most of the time) and I drink my water. I struggle with the vegetable thing, still, but that's another day. I have great restriction. I refuse to give up almond milk lattes. I am undisciplined and unruly.

BUT - I started this journey last March at 292 and waving between 167 and 169 is okay with me right now. I haven't been able to exercise much, so that is my next goal for the summer - working out again. My knees are completely f*cked but hey, I CAN SWIM AND I CAN BIKE. So, for what it's worth, if I don't hit 160 between now and August - with my new exercise regiment - then I won't be heartbroken. At least I will have some muscle filling me out a bit.

There really is no point to this story other than a)I am not giving up and b)It is nice to keep saying "I have 10 pounds to goal" everytime some jackass is like, "HEY! You are looking WAYYYYY TOOOOO SKINNNY" yeah right.

Suck it! I feel great!

Interesting topic...especially after adjusting my goal "weight" a couple of weeks ago and after some vacation realizations this past week.

I have a goal weight.  It's in the mid-normal of the BMI charts for myself and I'm not sure why I picked it other than that very reason.  

However, as far as the weight loss surgery goes, I've already achieved goal.  I realized that this week and it was f'in awesome!  My whole reason for the surgery was to live a more active, healthier life, participate with my children instead of watching from the sidelines, and being a part of things in general rather than hiding in a cocoon.  I've done this!  I have DONE THIS!  On vacation this week I hiked, I rode a waverunner, I was pulled behind the ski boat on an inner tube w/ my 6 yr old niece because everyone else was finished, I didn't run from the camera but smiled when it was pointed my way, I ate on plan all week with not a single cheat bite, I cuddled on the couch for movies, I slipped in and out of some pretty cute outfits all week long, I took care of my skin and had no sunburn.  I was just a very happy and very healthy woman for the first time in many years.  So yeah - goal met.  The weight is sort of just there and I will continue to lose as long as my body loses eating on plan.  But I've shifted focus.  It's about the plan, not the scale.  Because the surgery did it's job.  I can't wait for my 6 month follow up next month!  

(Oh, and I came home a size smaller than I left.  Boom.)

For me, it's about finding balance. I am healthier and more fit now that I've ever been in my life. As a child, I was active (dance, figure skating, swimming, horseback riding) but do not remember ever being "thin" except for a brief time during junior year in high school. My tummy was never flat. Between two knee arthroscopies to clean out some arthritis detritus (haha) and the VSG, my life has made a complete 180. I'm eating healthier and exercising now more than I ever have before. I lift weights, I've begun running. This year I have finished my first ever 5k, then went on to finish my first obstacle course race. There will be more (I'm signed up for the Spartan Fenway in November). At the moment, I am relegated to the couch while I recover from an extended abdominoplasty (now I really DO have a flat stomach, which just blows my mind ever time I look down, lol) but once the doc clears me, I'll be back to what I was doing before.

Anyway, back to the point of the post. I always thought I should be in the 110-115 range. I'm 4'11" so that shouldn't be an issue. OTOH, I have a large bone structure, and a body composition analysis showed my lean body mass was 110. So if I got that low, I'd probably look like I was dying. Add a few pounds there. Also add the effects of weight lifting. I've developed some pretty good muscles in the process of lifting to lean down some more. Add a few more pounds there. You can find stories of lifters who are healthy and look utterly amazing, but their BMI is in the overweight range because that unit of measure is so skewed. It doesn't consider muscle mass vs. percentage of fat, or lean body mass vs. the amount over that, so my focus has now turned to percentage of body fat, and that is what I'm working to reduce. Where my own weight in pounds will fall when I get to where I want to be body-fat-percentage-wise, that's where I'll be happy.

For anyone else, I think it depends on what you're comfortable with, where you feel healthy (mind and body), where your DOCTOR is content with your weight, and what you can reasonably maintain. Cultural, religious, ethnic, and other factors like that...they can make us feel differently about where we are, but for people who were MO or SMO, I think we have to go by a different set of measures. We had major metabolic issues that we have overcome, but the effects may be with us for the rest of our lives, and that sets us apart from the population who were never obese to begin with.

Very cool topic. :)