I think I may be going insane..

Hi Kim, yes, I waited until I got through my surgery..but apparently didnt' wait long enough. i should just accept the fact that I will always need to take these drugs. I just hate being tied to them.. but being tied to them, sure beats wanting to dump my whole life and run.  jess

Jess, I just wanted to say I am glad that you are planning on getting some help to get through this. It is not something to be ashamed of. So many of us think that losing all this weight will take care of all our problems, but we find out that is not the case. Acknowledging there is a problem and addressing it with the appropriate help from a thereapist, doctor, medication if need be and just talking about things will help you get back in action. Take care Sher

Thank you Sher, I really appreciate all the support I recieved today. I feel 100% better than I did this AM. I was so down this morning. I hate when the depression hits me like a freight train. I am always the first person to nag at my baby sister when she drops off her bi-polar meds...because she feels better..and I just did the same thing... I am going to have to start practicing what I preach..and eat some humble pie and be a better support for my baby sis.  thanks.  Jess

Thank you for posting this I've been feeling exactly this way for awhile and just know if I was just going through a stage or what, It's like I dont feel like myself, I've had the blues  before and could always get myself out of it but this just wont go away, now I kinda know where to start, I just want to run away sometimes to and things I used to be able to shrug off Im not able too.  I've never seen anyone before could you recommend where to start, cause I have started to self medicate and will do anything to stop. I really want to get to the root of the problem,  I have an idea of some of the things that cause this but dont know how to get passed them or heal from them.  thank you again, I feel so much better.

You are not alone, that is for sure. I am so surprised by all the response I got to my post. They do talk about your psychicatric health pre-op..but not to the degree I think they should. Not that I would have decided not to have my surgery, but I probably would have been better prepared for this and would not have gone off my medication for depression. I do think you should go talk to your physician and see what your options are. I've gotten some good advice on here and I am going to take almost all of it. When I first started noticing my "mood swings" It was years ago and I showed up at my doc's office crying and angry..I almost deliberatly took my car (a car I worked hard for and LOVED..I'm a car person.some women are shoe or purse women..I'm a car person..and for me its mustangs) and plowed it into the side of another driver who pissed me off during morning commute. I was so angry, i could barely breath, actually was probably having a nervous breakdown.  I had no idea it was depression, I thought I was nuts. I had been crying sporadically for weeks and my boyfriend (now my husband) didn't know what was up. The doc put me on Prozac..and while that mellowed me out, it also made me into "zombie" and I also had massive sweating as as side effect. As a 230+ lbs woman, sweating at the smallest exertion is very embarrassing..I"d literally stand up from my desk and I'd be pouring sweat..it was bad.. then I switched to effexor, zoloft, celexa and some hybrid of Celexa that I can't even remember the name of.. anyhow, they finally put me on Wellbutrin and that works well for me.. no side effects, other than quitting smoking..which is a great thing. So, I had last night to think about it..i'm filling my prescription and have appointments scheduled to meet w/ my therapist..  thats just my story, and I'm not sure I took the right avenue, but as someone else on here mentioned..perhaps its a vitamin deficiency or a thyroid issue..so get checked first..but my prayers and best wishes are with you. I can only say.. you will feel better...and this will all seem like a fuzzy, bad dream. :) Speedy healing to you.. Jess

Depression can also be caused by things like hypothyroidism. Please be sure to have your labs checked, especially your thyroid. And not just the TSH but the T3 and T4 and the antibodies. Dr. Lowe has a very good website www.drlowe.com that explains about different problems that can be caused by the thyroid being out of balance. I too suffer from depression and did not quit my Effexor when I had surgery, I just changed to the tablet form. I'm in the process of having some more tests for thyroid because my thyroid is rock hard and has a lump on it. I'm sure it has quit working all together because when I upped my dose of Armour Thyroid, the depression I was going through went away and I'm not so tired all the time.  I would get on some antidepressants until you can figure out what is going on. Also different vitamin deficiencies can cause depression or anxiety so be sure to have your meds checked again! There was a post a couple days ago with a list of the labs to get checked that you might want to check out. Good Luck! Diona

Thank you so much Diona. I am going to have that tested again, because my mother and sister both have thyroid issues. I never had them...ironically..LOL. Thanks for your input, I'll have it checked.  Jess