self destructive behavior - am i "better enough"?

Kim, I feel for you honey, I think the majority of us go through this.  Some earlier out than others.  Why don't you try the 5 day pouch test or better yet, come join us on the Texas Message Board.  We are doing what we call "Back to Basics", it really isn't a standard plan we are all following but a high protein, good carb eating style, posting what we ate for accountability (just like the Accountability on the Grad Board).....reminding each other to drink water, take our vitamins. I find being accountable and logging my intake into fitday I do way better.  It's like I go in denial mode when I don't log my food, then all hell breaks lose. Believe me you aren't alone. Hugs,

thanks dana i hadnt been logging what i eat because i thought that it made me feel like i was obsessing but, maybe i need to obsess a little =)

Kim, One thing I've tried is to substitute things for those bad carbs---I believe that all carbs are not created equal and that fruit, veggies, and whole grains are needed in a healthy diet. So I add whole grain bread, crunchy veggies (my fav right now is red peppers strips) or fruit. But sometimes it takes baby steps to wean yourself from the "bad" carbs. Some of my tricks are not perfect but they are a step--- salty snacks (chips):  protein pretzels, All-bran crackers, whole grain cereal measured out in a little snack baggie.  Those 100 calories/single serving bags of crunchies in a pinch but I try to avoid those. sweet snacks:  SF hard candy, one square of dark chocolate (I like the Ghiradelli squares--you can break them into four pieces and fool yourself), South Beach cookies or any of the SF cookies (Murray is a brand here that has several flavors).  With the SF cookies you can only each 2-3 because they have sugar alcohols---a real deterent to overeating. Whenever I have one of these snacks, I always try to have a cheese stick or slice of turkey or ham (HC lunchmeat) with them so I get a balance of protein and carbs and feel full longer. Good luck.

I have never seen or heard of protein pretzels, but I do love pretzels.  Where do you get those?

Thanks,

Melissa

 

very good ideas we all have to learn and do what is right for us and that's what you have done i am going to take your ideas for myself thanks so much for sharing kf

Melissa, They are Kay's Naturals which can be ordered from many of the bariatric sites.  My favorite is Netrition.com.  I think Bariatric eating also has them.

You have come a long way...don't give up...It is harder than I think many of us imagined it would be.  I know I thought I would barely have to work at my weight once I lost it.  Yeah!  I was wrong.  It's easy to let old comfort habits back. (CARBS!!!!)   The key really is "moderation"....When I eat something that is not weight loss friendly, I measure how bad it was for me based on how guilty I feel about it!  LOL If I eat a sliver of cake with icing...I give myself a pat on the back...If I eat an entire piece...I KNOW I did wrong...I get up the next few mornings and work out. HARD! If I eat mashed potatoes with gravy...No problem...If I do that all week...I got a problem... If I have a tootsie roll...or even five....no problem...If I keep buying bags of them to stock up...PROBLEM!   I recognize my destructive behavior and I think you do too...It's okay to settle for a little weight gain. Or your words "better enough"....I think it's a natural process with age.  But eat healthy good choices MOST of the time.  Plan your meals a day or two in advance so it's harder to stray from a plan and eat mindlessly (Oh...and when you buy chips and dip...that's a plan for disaster...so buy a healthier "planned" version)...have a mental idea of what you will eat and have good snacks readily available so when you do get that urge, you have something to munch on....I go pickles and soy crisps or nuts for crunchy...protein bars for sweet and filling...cheeses, sf pudding, yogurt for creamy....and fruits and veggies for sweet and crunchy fillers.  When I am really outta control...I get out the raw veggies and munch with peanutbutter, yogurt dips, or just plain.  Or I just give in a get a few cookies at the bakery! Sure I'd have the doritos and potatoe chips and cookies if I buy them...I buy a dessert at the bakery and serve to my family so I can have a taste without having a huge batch to get rid of...Or quilt or temptation.  I look forward to the times I allow myself a naughty treat...It's okay...The less quilt I place on myself..the less I work at trying to sneak and cheat myself...In other words...finally, less is more! I am so satisfied with a bite than I am the whole cake... If you have a carb monster right now...It's going to be near impossible to cut the carb cravings...You have got to cut out the white simple carbs and sugars for now and get control back and you will feel sooooo much better and sooo much more confident...Then you can begin doing carbs in moderation.  I do most of my carb binges at that time of month because i am always soooooo hungry and I have to work so hard at control, I just give in and to heck with it! It's only a few days!  You are different now and you can allow a little indulgence...but do it with confidence that you will make up for those times with eating leaner the next day and getting exercise.  You have to make a sort of deal with yourself...Look at your gorgeous family and BE THERE for their kids, your grandbabies!  I have a 21 yo and a 19 yo and I want to run around with their kids one day (They are still imaginary grandbabies...which I don't imagine anytime too soon!)  and play with them...That is always a great motivation for me.  When I think back to the year before WLS...I was just waiting to die and finally be put out of my misery and pain....NOTHING can make me go back there...not even this struggle to just give up and pick up the old ways.  Nothing good can come of that....You are sooooo worth the effort...You have to believe that...I see it in the smiles on your families faces...Dig deep...You'll find it.... Go pick up a 3 or four really healthy things you think you can munch on happily to replace the junk you've been giving in to....and give yourself a hug...because you look great and you have not totally lost all control...You've still got the prize....

you are so right  less is more thanks for taking the time to reply and help me i appreciate it kf

What's really important is that you are recognizing those destructive behaviors and addressing that. I don't know about you, but I used to deny deny deny that I was being destructive and making bad choices before I started this lifestyle.

It really is true that if you go through a simple carb "detox," you don't crave them as much. I actually kind of prefer my burgers bunless now....which is weird for someone who loves to bake.

There are a few little ideas on my blog about replacing certain "trigger" foods that might help you a little bit. Realize that you're taking a step though, and that first step is what will get you back on track. *hugs*

thanks neen i appreciate your input i will visit your blog i read a note that you posted to the burger and fries guy  you have some really good ideas kf