Question:
Could I be grieving food even before I have surgery?
I am scheduled for surgery on Sept. 3rd. I have been trying to cut back and eliminate some foods. I have sworn off carbonated drinks. I am weaning off caffeine, down to one cup in the morning. I am an emotional wreck! I cry at the drop of a hat. I feel like my live-in boyfriend doesn't understand these mood swings. By the way, I take a mood stablizer and an anti-depressant already! Anybody feel this way pre-surgery? — Melissa_B. (posted on July 24, 2008)
July 23, 2008
Absolutely! Choosing a healthy path may be the best thing for you but it
sucks.
— Lauren003
July 23, 2008
Cutting back on the "bad food items" prior to surgery makes the
post op process so much easeir. If you give up these foods prior to
surgery, it will help with pre surgery wt loss, and make the adjustment to
post op eating that much easeir. I adjusted to decaf coffee for the pre op
and first 5 months post op. I gave up sodas, and sugary foods. You need to
lose wt prior to surgery to help the surgeon do a LAP procedure. Losing wt
just prior to surgery helps reduce fatty liver deposits, making the LAP
procedure much easier for the surgeon. I suggest you also attend support
groups--you'll learn information from the instructor and other post ops,
and you'll feel much better prepared for the first few weeks post op, when
most patients tend to feel more anxious. I was nervous just prior to
surgery--it was my first major surgery under general anesthetic. But I had
done my research and was happy with my chosen surgeon. He's done over 9000
Lap RNY's with only one loss of patient. DAVE
— Dave Chambers
July 24, 2008
Sure you can grieve before surgery. You have made the decision to change
your life. You will be sad for the changes but happy at the same time. I
love pasta! I would get nervous at the thought of never having it again.
I know now that I may be able to have some of it in the future but for now,
it isn't the thing for me. Loosing the weight means so much more to me
than ha plate of linguini with Alfredo sauce.
I had my lapband inserted on the 19th of May and have lost about 20 lbs
since then. I am happy about the decision I've made and I am certain you
will be too.
Keep your goal in mind and you won't miss the comfort foods and drinks so
much.
Best of luck and good health to you sister!
— mannecote
July 24, 2008
What you are experiencing is very normal. You feel like you are about to
lose your best friend- food. A lot of people feel this way both pre and
post surgery.
I recommend this book I just finished for the second time..."The
Emotional First Aid Toolkit" a guide for life after bariatric surgery
by Cynthia Alexander talks alot about depression with WLS both pre and post
op.
Good luck,
Dawn Vickers, RN, BLC, CLC
— DawnVic
July 24, 2008
You didn't say which surgery you are having but trying to cut back on
certain things before surgery is good......The onlt thing I was told to
never do againg was carbonation and I haven't touched it....if you are
having RNY then sugar will be a problem.......but you should be able to eat
most of what you ate in the past....you just need to make better choices
and you'll be eating smaller portions.....It's normal to grieve the food
loss....after all food has been your best friend for a long time.....one
important fact that I think you need to know is the surgery is being done
on your stomach ....not your head and all the food issues you had before
surgery will still be there after surgery.....so you will have to find
another out let for deprssion eating....emotional eating......they need to
be worked on all thru this process...Good Luck.
Pam / Ft Worth.....Bandster Bites [email protected]
— pphillips4720aol.com
July 24, 2008
OMIGOSH...yes! It's very normal. I was so sad to give up food...I tried
eating all healthy stuff, gave up all my favorites, like bread and pasta
and rice...POTATOES! AHHH! I wondered how on earth I would ever do
it...Was never much a sweet eater...but I loved my white carbs...So fast
forward 4 1/2 years...I eat those thing in tiny moderation about once or
twice a week, I might have a tiny 1/4 cup of rice or pasta...(but I have a
hard time eating it because it just won't go down...Eating pasta is like
trying to swallow a hose...EVEN 4 1/2 yeaar later!
I don't miss these things anymore because i allow a taste now and then of
whatever I want. I tend to be quite emotional over food...so rather than
totally deprive myself...I will take a sample and I have trained myself to
be quite content eating a small taste of naughty food rather than a full
or oversized portion. It's a deal I made with my self...This way I won't
cheat myself, lie to myself, begin old habits...and if by chance I do eat
too much junk food...I make an effort to work out the next day and start
each day new with good intentions. I think a good healthy mental view of
things makes having an eating disorder easier to maintain long term. You
have to decide to change...You have to be totally honest with
yourself...YOU know if you are strong enough to allow a taste or if you
must totally give up something because you know you cannot stop once you
start...It's a personal choice I think...But you decide what kind of person
you are. I am one that can eat one potato chip and not touch another. If
you are not...don't buy a bag. Get your crunch somewhere else...soy
crisps...pork rinds... veggies...Whatever...So...some foods you need
substitutions for...and some foods you can learn to enjoy just a taste now
and then. I can't buy bread...Bread is a trigger food for me...I smell
bread and it's all over for me! I gotta run away from the smell...But put
ice cream and potatoe chips and french fries or chocolate or candy in
front of me...and I'll go get a yogurt and be quite content...Get rid of
the really bad foods that you can't say no to and find a healthier
version...So...yes...fod separation issues are real...and it's so
hard....but dealing with it now is a good way to learn what you have to
live with...But...It does get easier...and the restriction of rny makes it
100% easier...By the end of a year...you learn to eat right and then you
are on your way to a normal, healthy sized person...I'm still slightly
overweight by BMI...I lost 150 lbs and I feel wonderful...I wear a size 8
and maintain my weight...I'm not one that allows myself to be rated by a
number on the scale or a BMI chart...I like how I feel and look and this is
where I want to stay...Me and my pouch have our struggles with food...Like
any other addiction...but RNY is the tool that keeps me in line,and being
totally grateful for this healtier thinner version makes me strong enough
to keep trying...If you allow yourself one guilt free favorite every few
days...you will have something to look forward to...When i want something
sweet...I buy a chocolately covered protein bar! WLS candy! I eat that for
a meal...Another neat trick is to fool yourself with low fat, low carb
recipes that taste fattening but are a perfect disquise...Look for low carb
recipes...Do google searches...go sit in a book store and look at the
recipe books for ideas to make healthy tasty changes...Start looking at
labels...Look for high protein and fiber and low carbs and sugar. compare
your old version with healthier ones...It's so much easier once you learn
how to do it...Try ground turkey rather than ground beef...or veggie
burgers...Eat on a half a whole wheat bun rather than a white flour
one...LITTLE changes like this make enormous differences. Eat fish a few
times a week rather than spaggetti or fatty foods...Make your own pizza on
low carb wraps in the oven...It's like a thin crust pizza! DELICIOUS! Use
turkey pepperoni slices! Hormel makes them...See? This is how you do
it...Need a quick sweet fix...Berries and other fresh fruit! SF pudding and
jellos... Or Chew gum..Drink lots of water...add lemon and stevia or other
sweetener...Drink Tea rather than coffee. I use a natural no sugar
sweetener...I love (non-alcohol) Stevia drops...Tastes just like sugar and
it's a plant...no cals, no carbs nothing fake about it. I grow it in my
herb garden too...Get excited about NEW food and you begin to forget you
are morning the old food...Move forward...You don't have to go backwards!
It's easier than you think...So get outta that funk and look at some of
these low carb WLS recipes to start!
http://theworldaccordingtoeggface.blogspot.com/
Good luck...Learn to LOVE healthy food...Old favs don't feel this good!
— .Anita R.
July 24, 2008
I just got my surgery date yesterday and it is for Aug 4. I also have to
do a pre-op surgery diet and let me tell you it is so hard. I never knew
that giving up food would be this hard I never really realized that I have
an addiction. I am a wreck as well I am not to the point of crying but I
am very grumpy. I don't think that quitting smoking was this hard. I am
just looking forward to the long term payoff. I am also glad that there is
someone else going through what I am.
Jessica
— anxious247
July 24, 2008
For depression take a powerful liquid vitamin/mineral like VEMMA. Go to
TrySomeVemma.com
— [Deactivated Member]
July 24, 2008
VERY NORMAL. You are giving up the thing we all love best. Food. I was
grouchy, moody, sad, depressed, and kinda mad that I have to give this
stuff up. Hang in there. Sorry your boyfriend doesn't understand.
— azoreangal
July 25, 2008
Oh boy do I know how you feel! I'm just hitting the 2-month mark on my
pre-op eating plan. (I REFUSE to use the "D" word!) I was
miserable the 1st couple of weeks. Now this is just me restricting fat,
sugar, and attempting to restrict caffeine intake. I had already (about 2
years ago) stopped drinking carbonated drinks & had cut way back on
pasta, bread, & potatoes so I have only 1/2 the battle you have right
now. I was hungry, cranky (okay--nasty!) and I cried, as you say, at the
drop of a hat.
<p>
I got some really good advice from some people here. I increased my LEAN
protein by adding some protein shakes. That helped with the hunger which
made all the rest just a little easier.
<p>
My hormone levels are all over the map because of my weight and the fact
that I'm hitting menopause (or it's hitting me is probably more the truth!)
Even if you are younger than I am, you have to consider that. Make sure
you keep your blood sugar low and level by eating something healthy every
2-4 hours. High protein, low fat, high fiber stuff. Low blood sugar REALLY
messes with the moods.
<p>
And yes, if you're anything like me, you are probably thinking this is like
all the other grim, restrictive, deprivation diets you've ever been on so
you probably ARE grieving. If you're like me, you might have been using
food as a comfort medication for many years. To suddenly stop doing that is
going to cause some HIGH ANXIETY. It sure does for me. I find myself pacing
around the apartment, trying to pick fights with my husband, or yelling at
the TV or.....crying!
I think this is something we have to work through. Before we have the
surgery which will FORCE us to not east like we did before, we need to be
aware of all the things we have been doing unconsciously all these years
just so we know what to look for and how to recognize the feelings.
<p>
I've been looking for other hobbies, interests to keep me out of the
kitchen and my mind. I've reorganized all the cupboards and closets in the
house--with the help of my new label-maker. I'm learning to sew. I'm
swimming as many days a week as I can. We're going to baseball games--about
2 miles of walking each way! I get my nails done. I go to the
library--anything I can think of to get me out of the house and away from
the kitchen.
<p>
One more thing: if you've lost any weight, please go back to your doctor
and insist he/she check your medication levels. Weight loss messes with
med levels.
<p>
Good luck.
— Tina G.
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